On this week’s episode of the More Life with Carl Radke podcast, Ciara Miller gave her Summer House castmate some insights into what she’s experienced as a Black woman on reality TV since first filming for the show in 2020.
“I was so nervous and I was like, ‘How long do I keep my mouth shut for? How long do I just grin and bear it and be whoever, or just kind of assimilate into the space?’” she said of joining The Hamptons-set show as its first Black castmember.
Ciara shared it wasn’t until Mya Allen joined the cast the following year that she became comfortable talking about race on ‘Summer House’ because of various incidents that had happened in the house, including Mya being called by Ciara’s name by more than one housemate. The two shared their experiences in a house meeting that aired in season six.
“I remember I called my mom before that conversation, ‘I just don’t know what to do, like Mya feels this way, she’s right, I know she’s right, but, like, how do we have this conversation?’ and, also, I’m not going to have this conversation for it to not make the edit as well, and I remember fight with, like, kind of the behind-the-scenes of, like, OK, who’s editing this conversation, like, how is this even going to play out, because I don’t want people to think we’re pulling the race card,” she said.
Though difficult to have, Ciara shared she believes conversations like the one she and Mya initiated on the show are essential.
“[I]f you’re having interracial and intercultural friendships, like I want to know what you go through, I want to know what makes your culture different from mine, I want to know so that I don’t make these mistakes and I don’t make these assumptions about you and vice versa, and I think that’s the true intimacy in friendship, like we can come over to each other’s side and see it, you may not be able to understand, you might not have gone through it, but for you to step in and at least tap inside my head and see what my thoughts are and even just allowing me the space to vent and be honest, that is so important,” she said.
Last December, Ciara took that conversation to TikTok in a series of comments on a post by content creator @joshtherhonystan defending Southern Charm star and close friend Venita Aspen. Prior to production beginning on the current season of ‘Southern Charm,’ star Craig Conover (who used to date Ciara’s close friend and former costar Paige DeSorbo) allegedly refused to film with Venita, a threat @joshtherhonystan posited in his video could have prevented Venita from being on the show at all.
“Imagine being the only black girl on a predominately white cast in the SOUTH,” the first post began. “No one ever sees Venita’s side. And her cast only expects her to be submissive to their opinions and limelight. If a main cast ‘refuses’ to film with another main cast member; that’s code for trying to push them out. So yes, your entire analysis of the situation is correct.”
“For some ‘odd’ reason, black women/people are held to such an insanely high standard, we are rewarded less grace, and we must always be the bigger person in every situation wronged or not, while our white counterparts can be as diabolical and disgusting and still remain fan favorites and don’t have to encounter 1/4 of the hate that we get simple [sic] for existing,” the second post read. “Not to mention getting paid more, and getting to reap opportunities we have to quite literally jump up and down just to get noticed for.”
“Audience: Talk s*** about someone else, but don’t ever let it be Venita,” began the third post. “And bring AMPLE reasons if that’s the case and also compare her to your favorite white cast mates. I’ll be she’s an angel.”
Ciara shared that the similarities and differences in their experiences on reality TV led her to publicly come to Venita’s defense.
“[S]he’s by herself, and, like, at one point in time I had Mya, I had Gabby [Prescod on ‘Summer House’], we could kind of explore some of these conversations, but it’s really hard to be one person in a group full of white people who think that they know, like, what racism is when they quite literally have no idea what it feels like,” she said.
With her close friend in the cast, Ciara admitted that ‘Southern Charm” is “a really hard watch for me,” citing the different expectations placed on Venita — and that she’s experience herself — versus the rest of the majority white, majority male cast.
“The things that their white castmates get celebrated for — having an opinion, being bold — as a Black woman you could never be, I could never be promiscuous, I could never have sex on TV, I could never talk about, like, certain things, I could never do all of those things and then be able to come back from it and think that I can have a career after the fact,” she said. “Like we have to watch every single step that we do because we know that we don’t get the same opportunities to mess up, we don’t get the same opportunities to make mistakes, we don’t get the same opportunities to say the wrong thing and come off a certain way, we don’t the same opportunities to express our anger the same way as our white counterparts.”
Per a tease from Carl during the interview, Ciara and new castmates Mia Calabrese and KJ Dillard had a conversation about race that will air later this season on ‘Summer House,’ giving her another opportunity to give the people in the house, and the people watching, into her lived experiences.
“To exist in a space where you feel you might not fit in but, like, you do it anyway and to, like, even just like little s*** as in how I’m wearing my hair where it’s, like, giving this Black girl like the freedom to experiment, like how special because I didn’t feel comfortable for a long time either wearing my hair in braids or, like, you know, wearing certain clothes out of fear of being, I would be assumed to be a certain way and I’m constantly fighting against people’s stereotypes that they’re already going to have with me so I have to actively try 10 times harder to be something else or more acceptable or more digestible so no one’s making these assumptions of me,” she said.
Watch the full interview here:
(Photos: YouTube; Bravo; Instagram)
