On Sunday’s episode of Sister Wives, Kody Brown revealed that he was left “so broken” in the wake of his divorces from wives Christine, Janelle and Meri Brown, that he considered “walking away” from his marriage to wife Robyn Brown at one point. 

During a conversation between the former husband of four and his only remaining wife, Robyn admitted that while she and Kody are not currently living plural marriage, the idea of doing so makes her “very scared,” given that her sister wives left their respective marriages to Kody within a span of 14 months. 

Despite Robyn’s concerns, Kody assured his wife that he was “at peace” with their new life as a monogamous couple, though he went on to reveal that he didn’t always feel this way following his trio of divorces. 

“Because I’ve been in plural marriage for so long and it was a sole focus of marriage for me, when we failed at it, I was sabotaging myself,” Kody told viewers, as reported by People. “There were days [that were] unfair to Robyn that I thought about just walking away from our relationship, too. And that was just because I was so broken, I became self-destructive.” 

While Kody apologized to Robyn for being in a “dark space,” claiming that he was aware that it not only “harmed” his wife, but was unfair to her, he also noted that he was angry because he believed Robyn was “withdrawing” from him, too. 

“ … And because you were withdrawing from me, I was experiencing not just the anger from the rejection and the anger from the failure of our failures in plural marriage and everything that I was experiencing there, it was causing me to literally have bad thoughts about us,” he added. 

As The Ashley told you last week, Kody also expressed regret on the latest episode of ‘Sister Wives’ for publicly stating that he never loved his first three wives. 

“I thought from my myopic perspective [plural marriage] was just hard on me, but I failed to recognize what a struggle this would be for my wives,” he said. “I’m trying to move on, but I’m kind of arrogant and cocky about how I do it in order to fight the emotions. 

“Like all that s**t I said about not loving my wives and stuff, my exes, was just like, me trying to dial in how I felt about it,” he continued, later telling viewers he was “bulls**tting myself” by claiming he never loved Christine, Janelle or Meri. 

“I was like, ‘Oh yeah, I’m not affected by this. Those mean women, they’re gone. I never loved them anyway.’ I mean, this is really the crap I was spewing because that was [the] only defense I had,” he said. “Divorce just does that to you.” 

While Kody admitted that his past comments about his former wives came from a place of anger, he maintained on Sunday’s episode that he’s not interested in living plural marriage again. 

“I don’t want to pursue another woman because I don’t want that headache, the questions, the struggles, the wonder about trust,” he explained. “I’m not in that space.”

Kody, who is estranged from many of his children, did state during the episode that he “can’t deny” the fact that his 18 children– 13 of whom he fathered with his ex wives– are a “blessing” that came out of plural marriage.

New episodes of ‘Sister Wives’ air Sundays on TLC. 

RELATED STORY: ‘Sister Wives’ Star Kody Brown Claims He Regrets Saying He Never Loved Ex-Wives Christine, Janelle & Meri: “I Was Bulls**tting Myself” 

(Photos: TLC)