‘Teenage Newlyweds’ Season 1 Finale Recap: Everyone Needs Counseling (And New Storylines)

We just...can't...
We just…can’t…

Well, gang, we’ve made it to the end of Teenage Newlyweds! We’ve watched as these youngsters got married, moved in together, had horrible birthday parties and fought over who’s going to do the dishes. It’s time for the season finale!

When we last saw the Newlyweds, Emma was being accused by her husband Joey of being a (and we quote) “naggy nagster.” George was unsure how to handle his wife Halie‘s constant longing for her family , and Brenda and Travis were still fighting over an abortion that Brenda never even had! It looks like not much has changed this week.

"I wish I had one of your new skate shoes to throw at you for bringing me here."
“I wish I had one of your new skate shoes to throw at you for bringing me here.”

In California, Travis and his pro-choice wife drive through a pro-life rally at Planned Parenthood. (Of course, this wasn’t set up by the show’s producers or anything…Nooo way!) Travis tells his wife that he thinks women should be prosecuted for having abortions. Brenda staunchly disagrees, but Travis insists that their punishment should at least be more than what they’d get for a parking ticket.

At the rally, they encounter graphic posters of aborted fetuses. Brenda is not swayed by Travis’ fear-mongering. Afterward, he reassures her, “I still love you.” Oh okay, Trav.

The face you make when you realize your hubby's idea of a date is going to an anti-abortion rally...
The face you make when you realize your hubby’s idea of a date is going to an anti-abortion rally…

While they’re in the car at the rally, some random protesters come up and start taking pictures of them. We’re not really sure what the hell is going on here. Are the protesters taking photos because they think that Brenda is about to have abortion? Or are the protesters part of the two dozen people who actually watch this show, and they’re fans of Brenda and Travis?

"Maybe if I pretend to be asleep she'll stop talking?"
“Maybe if I pretend to be asleep she’ll stop talking?”

Over in Oregon, Emma wants to go to marriage counseling, but Joey doesn’t. It doesn’t sound like fun to him; besides, he’s too busy working at the Feed ‘n’ Seed and buying double cheeseburgers at McDonald’s. He says that he doesn’t want a random stranger telling him how big of a lump ‘o’ uselessness he is.

Emma wants to talk about her parents confronting Joey about his lack of effort in the marriage, but Joey just says that Emma’s mom is “always naggy” at him.

That’s the way to your mother-in-law’s heart, Joe! Call her a nag on national TV!

"Wouldn't it be fun if you guys moved into the basement with us?!"
“Wouldn’t it be fun if you guys moved into the basement with us?!”

Over in Utah, it’s time for Halie to say goodbye to her family, who had been visiting her in Utah.  After the family leaves, Halie’s more upset than ever. She may be regretting her decision to get married and move far away from her family.

Halie calls her parents once they get home and they tell her that it’s normal for her to be distraught, given that she went from a high schooler living at home to a married woman living far from her family in a short amount of time.

"I'm gonna have to move her parents into the basement, aren't I?"
“I’m gonna have to move her parents into the basement, aren’t I?”

Meanwhile, George is complaining to his dad about Halie. He says Halie wants to move back to her hometown because she misses her family. George’s fedora-wearing dad throws down some life advice.

“We live in a world of convenience and it’s easy for people to quit and say they’re done with this. But when you marry, it’s a commitment to one another that this is not going to end,” he says.

Back in Utah, Joey takes his parents out to a sketchy pub to talk about life. As you do.

"It's awful! She's trying to make me take out the garbage and everything! When will I nap?!"
“It’s awful! She’s trying to make me take out the garbage and everything! When will I nap?!”

Joey’s decision to take his parents to the bar becomes even more questionable when we learn that his dad is a recovering alcohol. (Maybe he’s just there for the creepy-looking soup Joey was eating the last time he and his friends went to this place?)

Joey tells his parents about the little talk he had with Emma and her parents recently. They encourage Joey to consider doing the counseling that Emma is suggesting. They tells Joey that counseling saved their own marriage at one point.

We find out that Joey’s parents had their own marital issues due to Joey’s dad’s drinking. When Joey was a teenager, his dad passed out drunk while driving and hit another car head-on. No one was killed but the accident and the drinking did a number on the parents’ marriage. They separated for about a year, but eventually reconciled. Joey seems to be taking his parents’ advice to heart.

"But wait...when does the stork come into play? Biology is confusing...and stuff..."
“But wait…when does the stork come into play? Biology is confusing…and stuff…”

Over in California, Brenda gets Travis back for making her go to an anti-abortion relay. She takes Travis to meet with a pro-choice minister. Is that all these two have to talk about? Is this going to be their whole storyline? We get it, already.

They listen to the minister, who tells stories about women dying from self-inflicted abortions and whatnot, but Travis’s mind is not changed. Travis tries to tell the minister that he believes life begins at conception, but he seems to be fuzzy on the details of how conception actually happens. Instead of talking about sperm frizzling an egg, he says something vague about “the two cells coming together”…or something.

Oh my heck...make this storyline stop!
Oh my heck…make this storyline stop!

Later, Brenda and Travis go and see their therapist to talk more about the abortion issue. Oh my god, again?!

Travis feels uncomfortable because he thinks Brenda thinks having an abortion is “totally cool” or something. Brenda denies that she thinks abortion is “cool” and states that she was only OK with having one if she had been pregnant because they are basically broke and would have to try to cram Top Ramen into their baby’s bottle in order to feed it.

Eventually, Travis tells Brenda that he is, of course, still staunchly pro-life but good news…he won’t leave her if she one day has an abortion. Phew.

Back in Utah, Halie is still being a sad sack, so George decides to cheer her up by taking her to see his grandparents.

Can we just make the next season all about Bert and Janet? They're the best part of this show!
Can we just make the next season all about Bert and Janet? They’re the best part of this show!

The best part of this episode is getting to meet George’s adorable grandparents, Bert and Janet. George’s grandpa said it was love at first sight when he met his bride of 65 years.

“You are the love of my life,” he tells her as they adorably hold hands. They offer George and Halie some good advice about sticking to their marriage.

Aww, Bert and Janet! We couldn’t love ya more!

All of a sudden, the doorbell rings. Grandma asks Halie to get the door. At the door, is Halie’s baby niece. George has arranged for Halie’s family to come to surprise her. Halie is thrilled.

"Sucks for you, Brenda and Emma! I got the best husband!"
“Sucks for you, Brenda and Emma! I got the best husband!”

How sweet is this guy?! He is really trying here. Joey should be taking notes!

“Oh my heck! What the heck?!” Halie exclaims.

Halie’s parents surprise everyone by saying they are seriously considering moving to Utah to be close to her. Even Halie’s older sister and her husband are considering making the move. Okay, this is weird. The whole family is relocating to be near Halie?

Over in Oregon, Joey goes home to tell Emma that he has decided that he will go to counseling with her. He reassures Emma that, even though she’s a “Naggy Naggster” he loves her.

"Please give us another season, FYI, so I don't have to get a big boy job!"
“Please give us another season, FYI, so I don’t have to get a big boy job!”

The season ends with one final montage of the couples hugging and talking about their marriages. George’s dad leaves us with some final words of wisdom.

“To the people who think that they’re too young to be married, I would say…it’s their story to write.”

That’s it for Season 1! FYI has yet to let us know if they will continue following the Season 1 couples, or if we will meet new couples if the show is renewed for another season.

To read our recaps of the previous episodes of ‘Teenage Newlyweds,’ click here!

(Photos: FYI)


11 Responses

  1. On the one hand, I really liked this show from the beginning, and was interested in this glimpse into teenage newlywed life. I certainly wasn’t expecting anything deep, of course, just amusing. But…looking back, basically after the first episode or so NOTHING happened. Or at least nothing that couldn’t have been covered in one episode after the weddings, maybe two. I guess props to the editors for stretching the drama so long with so little content to work with?
    All that said, Halie and George are going to be fine once they both grow up a little together, Joey doesn’t show much promise of growing up but if he doesn’t Emma better haul ass outta that marriage, and Brenda is crazy beautiful but the rest of their connection beyond conflicting beliefs about abortion remains a mystery.

  2. I really thought George and Halie were the best couple at the beginning, but bringing her family to Utah is so not the answer. They are obsessively close to each other and I feel like Halie will run to them for every little thing. The two of them really need to live somewhere without either family and find their own identity as a couple.

    1. I don’t think they need to live away from both of their families; I think they need to mature and get it together. I think their marriage will work out in the long run because of their faith not because of happiness.. I think Halie had this idea of what life would be like with George and it’s not that..

      1. Wow…great. So they’ll be miserable throughout their marriage, but at least they’ll have faith. Makes total sense.

  3. I didn’t watch this show (we don’t get the channel) but I read every recap. I felt like I watched every episode! Love your recaps! Thanks for taking the time to write them!

    Also, I’m totally rooting for Halie and George! There’s nothing wrong with getting married young and they’ll get it sorted ??

    1. I wouldn’t say that there’s “nothing” wrong with getting married young. There’s lots of things that can be wrong with it, but it doesn’t mean it won’t work out. It just means that the probability of it working out is extremely low. Good times.

  4. George has bugged me the whole season. And, he looks like a turtle when he cries. I just had to say that.

      1. As someone living at the edge of the ‘Morridor’ I can confirm this.
        Bonus points if they look like they feel simulataneously ‘CTR’ and ‘edgy’.

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