Roger Mathews Asks His Estranged Wife Jenni Farley for Truce in Their Public Battle: “Peace. Let it Begin Here. For Two Amazing Children”

“I’ll stop if you stop, K?”

Roger Mathews is begging his soon-to-be ex-wife Jenni Farley to put an end to their very public divorce battle.

Roger fired back at the Jersey Shore star with a very lengthy letter that was a response to the infamous “Message to Roger” letter Jenni posted on her website on Thursday that accused him of unsavory things such as getting physically violent with her, attempting to work with her exes to extort money from her, and endangering their two children.

On Saturday, Roger posted a very lengthy “Message to Jenni” on a website that looks like it was created specifically to post the letter. In the message, Roger explained each and every accusation that Jenni made against him in her infamous letter, offering his side of each story.

By mid-afternoon Saturday, though, Roger had deleted the entire letter from the website and his Instagram. He replaced it with a simple message on his Instagram that reads, “Peace. Let it begin here. For two amazing children. They deserve it. Please.”


View this post on Instagram


A post shared by Roger Mathews (@rogermathewsnj) on

In the letter he deleted, however, Roger gave his side of each of the events and actions Jenni discussed in her letter. He also addressed the video that Jenni posted to her website in which he is shown getting physical with her in their kitchen.

“You painted me as a woman beater,” Roger wrote. “I take responsibility for that night in question, and one other night that I can think of that, I pushed you. You edited out your actions and violent behavior prior to me pushing you which I knew you would do.”

However, he told readers that they did not see that Jenni had allegedly gotten violent with him but she chose not to make that part of the alleged clip public.

“You have punched me in the face, you have always been the aggressor…You are always the aggressor,” Roger wrote. “I want to say right here, and right now that did not give me the right to push you, and for that I am sorry, and I apologized at the time too.”

“You now have deliberately used your platform to destroy my life,” Roger wrote. “That’s exactly what you have done.”

“Can’t we all just get along?”

Roger also made several accusations against his soon-to-be-ex-wife, including that she is currently addicted to the drug Adderall; that she frequently smokes her “weed pen” in front of their daughter; and that she had previously tried to stab both of the ex-boyfriends– one of whom is Tom Lippolis— and then accuse them of physically assaulting her.

Roger told Jenni that she is “habitual offender and abuser of both men and the legal system.”

“You are not the person you claim to be,” he wrote. “How can three men in a row have the exact same experience and you claim all of them are violent and malicious…You’re a master manipulator who must be stopped.

“You painted me as an absolute monster…I am a hated man right now and if I read and saw what you put out there, hell, I’d probably hate me too but it is the furthest thing from the truth,” Roger wrote. “Your reality world has now made a crossover into our personal lives and this is not a game Jenni.”

He also claimed that Jenni posted her letter about him to her website because he and his legal team rejected her divorce and custody terms.

On Friday, Roger attempted to clear his name in an Instagram video, that also included a copy of the legal letter he sent to a judge asking that Jenni be required to take down her letter on her website. That post has also been deleted and, as press time, Jenni’s letter remained up on her website.

In his letter, Roger begged Jenni for a truce for the sake for their kids, Meilani and Greyson.

“Two very precious children who we both love very much have both been damaged…” Roger wrote, adding that he and Jenni look stupid for airing their relationship’s dirty laundry publicly.

“I do not hate you,” he wrote. “If I can forgive you and you can forgive me, certainly the world can try and forgive us. Please let’s stop the madness. Let’s both get help. For our children. We owe them that. I am not an abuser Jenni and you know it. We look like a**holes to the world. We are. We are both a**holes.”

“Let’s raise our kids better,” he wrote. “I want to help you. Please try and help me. We need each other. Not in the way we once did but this madness has to stop. Own your truths as I have owned mine. Work with me and I will work with you.

Roger, Jenni and their daughter Meilani in November…

“A part of me will always love you. I had to clear my name,” he continued. “I can help you clear yours too. I know all the good things you’ve done in your life as well as knowing the bad. Let’s make the necessary changes for our children. I will if you will. I want you to be happy and I deserve to be happy as well. Happy parents make for happy kids. We owe them this. I would be willing to give you a hug at the end of the day today as a truce offering.”

Jenni seemed to be responding to Roger’s latest post when she posted a quote by Jill Blakeway to her Instagram Story on Saturday.

“When a toxic person can no longer control you, they will try to control how others see you,” the quote reads. “The misinformation will feel unfair, but stay above it, trusting that other people will eventually see the truth, just like you did.”

Stay tuned…

RELATED STORY: Jenni Farley Blasts Estranged Husband Roger Mathews in Scathing Letter Posted to Her Website: “You Are An Abuser to the Core, Roger”

(Photos: Jason Merritt/Getty Images;Dave Kotinsky/Getty Images;Cindy Ord/Getty Images; Instagram)


  1. Getting a special needs diagnosis for your child can absolutely tear a marriage apart of you let it.. You end up taking everything out on the other person because you’re in pain and everyone “grieves” differently… I’ve seen it, and I’ve lived it. I truly hope these two can find a way to put the animosity aside for the two innocents involved.. Support groups, counseling – is a must for them. And stopping the public proclamations.

  2. He only wants truce because he wants to save whatever he has left of his public image. He doesn’t give af about those kids. Jenni tried to take the high road and he kept being a douche. If I was Jenni I would be petty af. He doesn’t deserve any kind of truce.

  3. Funny how before he wanted war, and now he wants peace because now he knows she has damning receipts. Posting all those crocodile tear filled posts on IG trying to make her seem evil. He should have stopped when she released that first response saying that she would never keep him from his kids, and that SHE wanted peace…but instead he kept going and started getting her psychotic ex’s involved, trying to further make her life hell…like a true abuser.

    This back and forth isn’t good for the kids, but I see why she did what she did. She really had no other choice because he was slandering the hell out of her. Her children could one day see and also believe his lies, just like a lot of people initially did. Maybe now he’ll finally stop, and they can handle this is private.

  4. The judge should issue a gag order on all parties. They aren’t going to stop publicly dragging each other and the kids are the ones who will suffer.

  5. Sometimes things are just too damn late.
    I don’t feel bad for him at all, this was all self-induced.
    I do feel bad for the children, they are the ones having to go through this, but, I also read a few posts people made about that this should be kept private etc… But. Domestic Violence is already something a lot of people keep private out of shame. I think with Jenni, being a public figure, being open about this, no matter how difficult, will help a lot of people. DV is a real situation for a lot of people, and often times, women do become so good at hiding it, you would never guess that they are going through something so painful. Hopefully things will start to get better for all parties involved. Love doesn’t hurt.

  6. Thank you, The Ashley, for making me aware of this statement: “When a toxic person can no longer control you, they will try to control how others see you,” the quote reads. “The misinformation will feel unfair, but stay above it, trusting that other people will eventually see the truth, just like you did.”

    As someone who is going through a divorce from a lying, cheating, gaslighting, manipulative, controlling abuser, it really helps just to read a simple truth. Even if no one in my life sees it, at least I saw that quote and I have hope. 🙏

    1. Jenni is the gaslighter here, but I wish you luck Lydia. The truth usually surfaces in the end. Stay strong! One day at a time.

  7. He’s asking for peace for the kids, which is what it seems like she had been doing with her silence. In fact, it’s the first part of her letter. None of us know what happens privately, but me thinks Roger doth protest a bit too much.

  8. That reads like pure gaslighting. He has made multiple public remarks, videos, etc. and he did it first from what I can see. The moment she goes public, he suddenly cares about privacy and tries to come across as the peacemaker and rational one. He didn’t seem to have any issues with going public as long as he was controlling the narrative.

    I don’t know whether Jenni is violent, does drugs, etc, but this latest statement from him is definitely gaslighting.

  9. I don’t know about this particular situation, but I was in an abusive relationship for a long time and there were a few times when I did fight back. I never initiated the violence, but my ex used my self-defense as a way to try to manipulate the situation into me being abusive. “What about the times you hit me?” “Remember when you did this/that?” It was how he justified his behavior.

  10. Ugh TheAshleys, I can’t believe you had to read and process that mile long letter. I feel for you. I tried but when I just kept scrolling and scrolling and scrolling I realized…Nope.

    It shouldn’t take that many words to prove you’re a good guy.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.