‘Sister Wives’ Season 17 Episode 5 Recap: One Final Brown Family Bash & A Sister Wives Clash

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. I never OK’d any sort of party, guys!”

The Ashley is well-aware that this recap is more outdated than Kody’s man visor, but she is trying to catch up on her Sister Wives recaps, so here we are with a recap of last week’s recap. 

We start of this episode, it appears to be a few months after Christine told Kody she was kicking him, his toxic personality and his poodle perm out of her damn life! 

Kody tells us that he feels very “separated” from his family— from Janelle and even Robyn and the kids. (He doesn’t even mention Meriwho has been chillin’ solo in her belltower like Quasimodo since Obama was President.)

Unfortunately, there’s not much time for “poor Kody” footage to air because Janelle went and bought herself a trailer longer than a list of Kody’s bad traits. Kody complains about how he has to somehow get this beast over to Coyote Pass so Janelle can live in it. 

They recently bought a new truck (that, unlike Kody’s “wussy” truck can pull the trailer), so Kody begrudgingly goes over to Janelle’s house to discuss  the process of getting the trailer home.

Meanwhile, Robyn has drawn her eyebrows on to look very judgmental today because she’s making it clear that she is not happy that Janelle purchased this trailer and truck without her Kody’s permission.

“I’m sporting Revlon’s newest shade ‘Cynical Cinnamon!'”

To be fair, the Browns have literally rented just about every house in the Southwestern United States, yet they had to buy a whole truck just to pull a trailer? WTF?

Robyn tells us she’s heard “funny stories” about how Janelle sucks at driving big vehicles and whatnot. What a laugh riot. 

Kody tells us that the truck they bought to haul actually used to belong to his late brother, so that gives us an idea of why Kody wanted to buy it. He still manages to complain, though, telling Janelle he doesn’t like to have “equipment” that he doesn’t use.

“I can think of some other ‘equipment’ of Kody’s that he doesn’t use…nevermind.”

Janelle tells Kody that she, too, loves that truck and offers to drive it so that it can get some use after it pulls the RV.

“I don’t want to wear out this truck on a soccer mom, OK?” Kody snaps.

OH NO HE DID NOT!

If I were Janelle, I would have slapped him until my hand hurt for that remark, then slapped him for making it hurt!

Sadly, though, Janelle just tells him to stop complaining and doesn’t address the fact that his comment to her was totally unnecessary and just mean. 

“If your visor suddenly ends up on fire, you’ll know who to blame…”

Janelle tells us that it is currently May 2021 and that she’s moving in one month. She hopes to start building her house on Coyote Pass by winter.

(Um…isn’t Kody going to be freezing off whatever balls Robyn hasn’t taken from him if he’s living out there in icy temperatures? There’s no way he lasts even one autumn night in the trailer with Janelle. After all, the only thing more “wussy” than Kody’s truck is Kody himself.

“I don’t see Kody doing well in this fifth wheel,'” Robyn tells us of the trailer. 

“I love that man but he’s softer than Meri’s buttery leggings!”

The Sister Wives all know that Kody’s going to see the slightest bit of frost on the end of his Top Ramen curls and go crying back to Robyn’s warm mansion (and gentleman greeter). But, they don’t want to discourage Janelle so they try to be positive about her idea. 

Christine does mention that Kody will have nowhere to put his crap now because Janelle is basically living in an outhouse, and Christine already kicked his stuff out of her house, and of course, he doesn’t want to keep anything in Meri’s belltower because then she may take that as a sign that he wants to start banging her (or at least talking to her) again. So it’s off to Robyn’s mansion for all of Kody’s hair gels and assorted man-visors. 

Kody is making it no secret that he’s not looking forward to bunking up in a tiny trailer in the middle of nowhere with “Number 2” and their daughter Savannah. But he knows the Polygamy Gods will revoke his Heaven Pass if he doesn’t do it. 

“Oooh! What if I just drove past Janelle’s trailer every other week or so? With Robyn’s permission, of course.”

Janelle says this is “typical Kody” that he’s on-board with something one of “The Others” proposes then he goes away for a few days and comes back with a list of issues. (Gee, I wonder where he is going when he “goes away” and who is “helping” him come up with those issues?) 

“Yeah…I wonder…”

Kody wants Janelle to “ask her Sister Wives” if she can put her trailer on the land but Janelle doesn’t understand why this has to involve Robyn and the Others.

And, of course, Meri has to object to Janelle’s plan…even though Meri couldn’t give a flying fig about Coyote Pass…or Janelle. Meri says that maybe she won’t want a RV pad out there in a random spot.

What the actual f**k, Meri?! You can put your outdoor wetbar in another location. 

Um…the land is currently being used as a coyote poop patch. Have a damn seat, Mer.

Kody tells us that, of course, this is Janelle’s fault because she doesn’t act like a woman who is married. 

“We do things separate,” Kody tells us. 

UMMM.

Kody says that Janelle should have asked her Sister Wives if she could park her RV on ‘their’ property. (Why doesn’t she just park it on her property? Oh, yeah, because Kody can’t make up his mind on where to draw the property lines on this wretched land.) 

Janelle is just over it. OVER.IT. She says they’ve been “talking about” the property for three years now and no one has done anything with it except set their Lysoled lawn chairs out on it on occasion to film a scene for the show. She wants Kody and the Sister Wives to finally get moving and do what they said they were going to do three years ago.

She says she doesn’t give a hoot what the other Browns do with their plots of lands because she’s ready to build on hers.

“Not gonna lie, I’m kinda loving the fact that I don’t have to be part of the Coyote Pass circus anymore. You can burn it for all I care!”

Janelle reminds us that, again, no one cares that she and her teen daughter are going to be homeless in six weeks unless they make this RV situation work, as there are no rentals available. Meri reminds us that she and the rest of these knuckleheads have still not used their TLC paychecks to pay this stupid property off so they can build on it. 

“I think it’s time the family prioritizes paying off the property,” Janelle tells us.

“Well…Number Two has certainly become demanding, hasn’t she? This will be discussed. Um…KODY?!”

Later, Meri heads to her bed and breakfast in Utah, where she tells us she’s trying to figure out how to run it, now that her mother has passed away. Meri’s mom had been running the inn and now Meri is stumped as to how she will continue to run the business in Utah while living in Flagstaff, Arizona.

The ever-helpful Kody suggests to Meri that she just move up there and run the inn. Not only will that solve her staffing problem, but it will also put about 300 miles between him and Meri (and her cobwebbed loins). Kody was probably so proud of himself for coming up with that plan.

Of course, Meri thinks Kody is trying to get her away from him. (Um…ya think?!) Robyn defends The Curled One’s actions, stating that Kody wasn’t trying to be insensitive and this was probably just him “thinking out loud.” 

Meri then gets all high and mighty, stating that she was here at the beginning and that she helped start this family.

Um, Mer? I’m not sure that’s something I’d be bragging about if I were you.

“You’re not gonna pull the leggings over my eyes, Kody Brown! I see what you’re doing here!”

Meri reminds us that, at one time, Kody actually loved her and wasn’t trying to pawn her off on the State of Utah. Meri says that Kody’s not going to get rid of her that easily!

Kody tells us that he wasn’t trying to be mean by suggesting Meri move, but he says he barely sees the lady now so who cares if she’s living in her Flagstaff or in Utah? He will ignore her no matter where she is. 

“She can stay nearby! As long as she stays away from me, of course!”

Meri assures us that she’s not going anywhere and is determined to try to save this “family.” 

Back in Flagstaff, Kody and Janelle are going to look at “their” RV. It’s Janelle’s birthday, so Kody is considering this RV (and I guess his presence?) to be Janelle’s birthday present.

Janelle then makes it clear that she bought the RV herself and that The Curled One had nothing to do with the purchase whatsoever.

“I did get a present from Kody, though: a framed portrait of him and Robyn.”

They arrive at the trailer, and Janelle tells us that the trailer is “massive” while Kody calls it “small.” (Usually it’s the other way around, eh, Kod?) 

Kody tells us that, despite Christine peacing out, he still plans to build five homes on Coyote Pass (someday…) He wants one house for each wife, and two houses to use as rentals. (I guess he’s given up his dream of owning his “Papa Polygamy Pad?”)

He says that the rentals will help them survive their retirement.

“Um, Kody? Are you meaning to tell me I’ll be bunking up next to STRANGERS on Coyote Pass? A word please…”

Kody keeps saying that his life is in limbo because Christine’s leaving and he doesn’t “know what that looks like.”

Um…it looks like her throwing her crap into her car and leaving so fast that the brakes squeal and dust comes up, bro. 

He says he’s still in the “anger phase” of the divorce and is happy to have this Coyote Pass project to distract him.

“And not the good kind of tying up that comes during me and Robyn’s sexy time, either!”

Later, the entire family is going to Christine’s house to throw Ysabel a graduation/18th birthday party. (Surely, Robyn will have every family member blasted with bleach before they are allowed to go near her or her offspring.) 

Christine’s busy setting up the party when Kody calls out Ysabel out of the blue (he must have wrestled his phonebook out of Robyn’s claws somehow). He wants her to come hang out with him, even though Christine needs Ysabel’s help with the party set-up. 

“So…you want to hang out with me now, but not when I’m recovering from major surgery? Cool.”

Christine’s gnawing on her arm to keep herself from torching Kody on-camera. She says that it “might” have been more helpful had Kody called to ask if he could help with the party, “you know, because she’s his daughter.” 

Christine is excited because they’ll actually be allowed to “touch people” at this gathering, thanks to everyone being COVID tested or vaccinated. (My money is still on Robyn bringing a fire extinguisher full of anti-bacterial soap that she just casually sprays on people when they’re not looking.)

“Any chance I can get one of those full of Kody-repellent?”

Christine says that she wanted to have this big party because she knows this is probably that last time they’ll all have to play “happy family” before she hauls ass out of Flagstaff.

Robyn tells us that she went ahead and told all her kids that Christine was abandoning the happy family and kidnapping Truely to Utah leaving, even though Christine hasn’t even told her youngest Truely yet. 

WHAT THE ACTUAL F**K MA’AM?! Once again Robyn has overstepped the boundaries and done whatever she could to make things harder.

She says that her older kids DaytonAuroraBrianna are sad and confused, while the younger two are “so sad.” 

Speaking of Robyn’s spawn, Kody hauls King Sol and Queen Ari over to their older siblings and makes a big thing about announcing each older kid’s name. (Anyone else think he did this because Ari and Sol have no clue what their siblings’ names are and Kody didn’t want that to be obvious on camera?) 

“I’m shocked you actually knew their names, Kody.”
“Honestly, me too!”

Robyn’s kids seem insanely thrilled to be at the party. Honestly, they look like hostages that were just set free and handed a cupcake. (I mean…they kind of are…)

Ysabel actually has to come up to Robyn to ask for a hug. Robyn seems incredibly uncomfortable with all the Sister Wives and germy kids running loose.

“If you breathe near any of Christine’s kids, you’ll need to be dunked in Lysol when we get home, Sol!”

Ysabel tells us later that she saw her parents’ divorce coming. Mykelti says she’s happy that Christine and Kody finally threw in the towel on their miserable marriage. (She says this in an interview in which her husband Tony is seated next to her, looking like some sort of Fraggle.)

At the party, Kody reflects on how many of his adult kids hate him…as you do. He tells us this has made him lonely and bitter at the entire family. 

Christine prepares the birthday cake for 18-year-old Ysabel. She talks about how Ysabel, now 18, can travel and go live her life…as an 18-year-old. 

Here comes Kody, though, asking her if she is turning “sweet 17.” 

THIS DINGALING DOESN’T EVEN KNOW HIS DAUGHTER’S AGE WHEN IT’S PUT RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF HIM.

I swear, the only thing Kody Brown is worse at than being a husband is being a father to adult children.

Christine, actively trying to keep herself from using the candles to light Kody on fire after that comment…

The Happy Family Day is about to become even more of a trainwreck because now these people are adding music to their awkwardness. Aurora is going to play the guitar and–Jesus God!– CHRISTINE IS GOING TO SING a song to Ysabel. 

Did we not suffer enough when we had to endure the “Let Me Call You Sweetheart” nightmare during Mykelti’s wedding? I still shiver whenever I hear anyone call anyone “sweetheart” because it reminds me of Christine’s screeching.

Anyway, after Christine sings, everyone is going to sing. (I’d imagine Robyn won’t be singing because, naturally, she will be breakdancing in the corner during this time.) 

“If you ever need someone to make an awkward party even MORE awkward, I’m your gal!”

The music starts playing and Christine grabs the mic. DEAR GOD.

She begins singing the theme song to The Hills for some reason and everyone starts crying. I’m assuming that’s because their ears are all bleeding but who knows?

The only thing that could save this scene is if Christine suddenly breaks into a rendition of “One Minute Man” while looking right at Kody…

To be honest, it does warm my cold heart to see the whole family actually trying to do something nice for one of the adult kids, who have been the true victims in this mess that Kody has created. It was nice to see one of the older kids getting some attention.

The party goes well and everyone has fun, which causes some of the adults to wonder why Christine would want to leave. After all, it’s quite a hoot over there….other than the fact that one wife is in exile, another is about to be homeless and the third hasn’t had a pickle tickle for a decade. But you know, other than that…

“How does this not work for everybody?” Robyn asks. 

Even Meri (who is probably just happy to be invited to something with actual humans) wonders why Christine can’t force herself to stay in a miserable marriage for the sake of the family. 

Christine says that Kody’s sad because he’s realizing that he missed out on most of his daughter’s life and now it’s too late to get to know her.

“OK, just one more time. Ysabel’s the daughter that made me pay for tacos for 400 people, right?”

He tells us he’s now starting to wish Christine wasn’t divorcing him and that Ysabel wasn’t leaving.

“It’s a weird thing to be getting left,” he tells us. “The message that we had to the world about functional polygamy seems so dysfunctional now.”

Well that’s the understatement of the century…

That’s all for this episode of ‘Sister Wives’! To read The Ashley’s recap of the previous episode, click here!

(Photos: TLC) 

58 Responses


  1. what can a self centered ass expect and who wants a little boy 53 to raise. his ego is hurt yuk and he will miss them earning money for him. he is being kept like a mistress and frankly i think he likes it. robyn is a brat and a narcissist


  2. Well sorry but Kody had 4 wives,
    It was not all about him & Robin,
    He had several children,he should of interacted with them,
    Kody better look in the mirror as he is losing it all,
    About time ,the wives stood up to him,
    They have a life too,


  3. You couldn’t be more spot on with your description of this awful man and his manipulation of the family.
    Laced with humor and just the right amount of sarcasm!


  4. Your hilarious recap of the Sister Wives had me laughing and you are a pro at comedy and writing. You described this dysfunctional family so well! Keep updating us. You write exactly what we think. Thank you


  5. Kody Brown is a lier and just a jerk. He will not take responsibility for any wrong doing. He puts the blame on one of the wives. HE is the one that drove Christine away. He never says ROBYN (favorite wife) is to blame for anything. He makes me sick to hear his voice or see his face. He says Janell and him bought that RV, no she bought it herself. Of course he has to take credit for it. He literally makes me sick. I would love to be able to bounce his head off the counter or any hard object. He needs to realize he’s NOT ALL THAT and he’s not that good looking. Thanks for letting me vent.


  6. Oh my goodness!! This is the best laugh I have had in a long time. You put Kody in his place. You should be the narrator for Sister Wives.


  7. This is one of the best articles that I’ve read in a long time! Well written and entertaining! Absolutely loved it!


  8. Enjoyed your recap. What does kody do for a living? I never see him work so I have to ask how he can purchase/rent homes and Coyote Pass. Do Jannell and Meri the only two who work in order to support the entire clan?
    I hate when Kody refers his children as the individual wives children; I.e. Christine’s children.
    I read some time ago Kody was looking or was courting a younger women but Robyn shut it down.
    My hope is that the children don’t follow in their parent’s footsteps.


    1. Kody is a gun salesman. I’ve heard gun parts at one point or possibly actual guns, either way he goes to gun shows and has a table there where he sells his wares. Either way I suppose its not spoke about on TLC because they don’t want to mention one of their “stars” working the local gun show. ?‍♀️


  9. I noticed that this season and last season that the wives eye makeup was way over done! That makeup person should be fired! Well, I guess everyone is out of work now!


  10. Why doesn’t anyone just tell Kody that he is a great joke and that he needs to grow up and start treating his wife’s with the respect that they deserve. He is absolutely ? a dog.


  11. Your recap was awesome! Finally someone who sees this man and his wives like i do. Sad for the kids but so happy for Christine run girl!


  12. I loved this and was laughing at the comments and descriptions of all involved. Kody doesn’t know why his relationships with older kids is strained? Oh wait, if he took accountability for his actions or inactions, he might face what is happening. He feels bad being “left?” Hello…..Mary….he had no problem dumping her. Kids is someone who can dish it out but can’t take it. That whole mess is a mystery as to why the women are still there or why this is still on TV. Robyn is extremely passive/aggressive with her comments and constant crying. Oh please!
    Ladies who are left, get the #@&% out of there and regain self esteem.


    1. That was the best read I have had all year. I mean, I cannot stand this pig. And you tell the story so well I can actually stand it. You hit the nail on the head so many times I’m in stitches on the floor in laughter girl.
      Keep up the great work I can’t wait to read the next one.
      Man I hope he reads these.


  13. Kody is a manipulating control freak and an abuser. It would be in the best interest of the children for there moms to keep him far far away. Restraining order away would be best. A father he is not. The only one that loves him is Robyn. The other sister wives should call child protective services to come and investigate both parents and there parenting but especially Kody. Those kids could go and live with any of the other sister wives and be very happy and even better away from Kody.Janelle is finally getting more of a back bone. She too should leave Kody.


  14. Love your interpretation so so true can’t stand Robin, m e r i is nauseating, Janelle’s in a cloud and thank God Christine is on her way out keep running Christine run Christine run


  15. I love your candid hilarious view on this family!..myself I can’t stand Robyn she is the reason the whole family fell apart.!t Started before they got married.robyn owns 57%of that property..smh..I’m glad Christine got out and away from kody.i feel for the children..and the other wives.


  16. I truly enjoyed the update of sister wives and your slant on the story but my favorite was your description of cody mine wouldn’t have been as kind or funny ps keep it up!


    1. Wow. Absolutely spot on with your observations! And Krazy Kody is such a poor excuse for a human being. All those Covid precautions… Arizona did not enact those! Numbnuts Kody should have gotten vaccinated! Not being there for that extremely serious surgery of Ysabel’s is inexcusable.
      You’re awesome Ashley! Couldn’t have said it all better myself.


  17. Please, please, please TLC! Shitcan this mess of a show, and give us a much better one, getting rid of Meri, Robyn, and Kody (along with their respective spoiled kids!)

    Great recap, and right on the money. The shambles that Kody and Robyn have created is just awful. Along with Meri, they are toxic, narcissistic people that need to get the boot in their asses, and GET REAL JOBS!


    1. I would LOVE to watch a show without Meri, Kody, and Robyn – if they’re smart, TLC will beg Christine to do her own series. Unlike those three goblins, Christine is easy and pleasant to watch, and she could genuinely inspire so many women who feel powerless and stuck in their own lives.


  18. OMG I loved this recap!! I’m new to THE ASHLEY site and I adore her writing. Sisters Wives has been a train wreck that I haven’t been able to stop watching—now I can’t wait to read all the recaps!! Kudos!!


    1. Glad you’re here, Chrissie! I swear, every recap is better than the last – I don’t know how the Ashley does it! Enjoy!


  19. Thank you for the funny content! You are a very funny woman while reporting the obvious. You should do stand up comedy, truly! Good job at breaking it down!!! I really enjoyed it!


  20. I can see why Robyn is commenting on Janelle not ‘asking’kody for permission to buy the trailer she sees that everyone is doing what they want and she can’t


  21. Looks like Robin finally won, she’s got Kody all to herself! Meri’s out, Christine’s gone and Kody clearly doesn’t want a relationship with Janelle anymore!!

    Robyn has offically gotten what she wants. She’s a good actress though.


  22. THANK YOU for this wonderfully smart and very funny review. I laughed and nodded my head all the way to the last word. Kody is so full of himself and Sobbin Robyn can’t wait until all 3 wives leave and she gets the egomaniac all to herself. PLEASE let Christine, Meri and Janelle have their own spin offs and let Kody and Robyn disappear from the airwaves.


  23. I don’t know if it’s conscious or unconscious, but Janelle buying the small cramped trailer that Kody doesn’t want to stay in means that Janelle is really leaving Kody too. Just leaving him in a different way than Christine.


  24. Robyn getting fat.

    Be careful , Kody will be finding another and you will be on the bottom of the pile.
    All yoy girls should get a move on and get Kody out of your lives.

    That would be a smart move

    You go Christne !
    Run free , run free.


  25. Definitely enjoyed this recap. Too funny!
    Kody is such narcissistic loser. I think its pretty sad, and pathetic that meri and Janelle don’t leave this nightmare.
    Especially Meri. Her situation is awful. Why doesn’t her daughter/son talk to her into leaving, and having self-respect.
    And Janelle. I think she actually is the only one that works so she actually pays for Sobbin’s nanny. Etc… I wish she would leave as well. She’s wayy too good for kody.
    Okay, I’m done. Haha


  26. Does Kody do anything else but whine? I, for the life of me, do not see what these women see in Kody. He has no personality, not good looking, a major hair problem and a total narcissist.


  27. Robyn is so sickeningly fake with pretending to care about Kody’s relationship with any of the other “wives”. I can barely tolerate her scenes. Also, it’s sad to watch Janelle continue to pretend that her and Kody have any kind of meaningful relationship. Did you see last night when he walked up to the trailor and she’s like “hey honey!” Just pathetic. We all know better. Stop pretending already.

    Again, I would love a spinoff with Christine, Janelle (not that I’m much of a fan) and their kids.


  28. I know it shouldn’t be shocking at this point, but every week I am surprised at Kody’s audacity.. Janelle needs to drive that RV away into the sunset and away from Kody and Robyn.


  29. The recaps are sometimes better than the show.
    The show is literally painfull to watch.
    I yell at my TV and my eyes and eyebrows hurt from being stretched up when Kody speaks.

    Meri was just being difficult about the RV to suck up to Kody.
    She bought a whole B&B, in Utah, just in her name and didn’t plan on sharing the income from it, while everyone always puts their money in the shared basket.
    She’s the one that started the F Kody, f the family thing and she makes Janelle out to be the disobedient wife?


    1. Good call on Meri! Kody probably wouldn’t even notice is she fell off the earth. Years would go by and then one day he’d be like, “Hey, I wonder what ever happened to Meri?”


  30. I loathe Kody more with each episode. I about jumped through the TV when he made the soccer mom comment and again when he got sweet Ysabel’s age wrong.


    1. He’s making me sick with pretending to GAF that Christine is moving. He’s just trying to make himself look better but it’s making him look like a schmuck because we all know she means nothing to him. Also, like Christine said, he didn’t care about spending time with Truely before, so she doesn’t seem to matter either.


    2. And he got Truely’s age wrong on last night’s episode. Christine corrected him ?. She also demanded that he make sure that Truely have her own room at Kody and Robyn’s house because she is done having her children play second fiddle.

      Kody really does manage to out do himself every week. He’s competing against himself for biggest jackass.


  31. If I were Janelle, I would have drove that truck right up Robin’s ass, and brought it back to Kody on empty, covered in shit.


  32. Let’s move on to tonight’s Shit Show (10-16-22) of Kody’s (consistent) Delusional reality! He is so full of (himself as always) his life with Robin, he doesn’t even know how ridiculously he looks with all of his “Covid” excuses! I just wonder where they all would be if covid wouldn’t have happened. He has rode this train to the fullest extent possible. Kody you are fouling no one! #kodysucks

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