Teen Mom 2 Season 6 is over, guys. Gone are the nights of watching Jenelle Evans call the cops on her booooyfriends, witnessing Nathan Griffith‘s gym-sesh tantrums, or seeing Jo Rivera complaining about being broke (before climbing into his brand-new BMW, of course). All that is left is the Season 6 Reunion special, where our birth-control-challenged heroes will be berated by good ol’ Dr. Drew Pinsky, who can barely contain his disdain for these people after six seasons of hosting this crap.
This week’s episode features only Kail and Jenelle’s sessions, so we’ll have to wait until next week to bust out our banjos for Leah‘s turn on the couch. (Oh…and Chelsea will be there too, apparently.)
The Ashley will be recapping only what is shown on screen during this episode. If you want the real juicy gossip of what happened behind-the-scenes of the ‘Teen Mom 2’ Season 6 Reunion taping, you’ll want to click here.
Anyway, on with the show!
The episode starts off with all four moms on the couch opposite of the “Docta.” We get a quick flashback of this season, including clips of Jo talking about his time machine, Nathan doing his trademark “Jeneeeeeellle!” scream while being shoveled into a cop car, and Leah screaming at Jeremy for making fun of her trashmobile. Aww…memories!
After watching the clips, Dr. Drew basically tells the girls that he can’t believe that their lives are so ridiculous.
“I get emotional when I watch that, and that’s your lives!” he tells them.
Dr. Drew is literally cringing as he talks to Leah about her, um, stress issues. He then congratulates all of the girls for having a direct effect on dropping teen pregnancy. Who would have thought that watching Jenelle scream at her mom, and Chelsea peeing out her IUD would help teens?!
Soon they haul the other three girls off the stage so Dr. Drew can talk to Kail alone. He brings up what a disaster Kail’s marriage to Javi was for a while, and how Rappin’ Jo is giving her a hard time.
We watch clips that illustrate these points, and Kail says that she and Jo have let the whole child support thing go for now. She says it’s not worth going to court since Rappin’ Jo has been rolling his coins to make his child support payments on time. (Surely that CoinStar in Jo’s new ‘hood is getting a lot of use these days! But you know what they say– pennies buy kids tennies! Wait, what? No one says that? Oh, well.)
Kail also reveals that she and Javi had already drawn up divorce papers and they were about to go their separate ways at one point. Of course, they wheel out Javi to talk about all their fights about concerts, hamburgers and cell phone passcodes. Dr. Drew seems determined to prove that Javi’s jealous and Kail’s neglectful, but he keeps getting shut down by both of them. Drew seems disappointed that he’s unable to stir up unnecessary drama. (Just wait a few minutes, Drew. Jenelle is next and she’ll provide all the “WTF?” moments you desire!)
They next bring up the fact that Rappin’ Jo is unemployed, and Javi seems angry that Jo can’t be bothered to take a job, since he’s more than capable of asking if someone wants to supersize their drive-thru order. Drew seems puzzled as well so he brings out Jo to tell his side of the story.
Jo is sporting some luscious locks these days. His hair is literally shining bright like a diamond under the stage lights, due to the bucket of gel (or whatever styling product he borrowed from Vee) he has dumped over his head before coming out on stage. Drew is trying not to look at Overgelled Jo’s wet mop, but he’s having a hard time.
Anyway, Drew comes down hard on Jo for missing a bunch of Isaac’s events. Jo says he made a mistake, but Drew keeps drilling him about his leisurely lifestyle.
“I mean…what do you do with your time all day?” Drew asks Jo.
Jo claims he goes to school (“School of hard knocks, yo!”) but Drew asks why Jo doesn’t have a job.
“I don’t currently work a 9 to 5 job,” Jo says. (“Because I be rappin’ 24/7, yo!”)
He claims that he doesn’t want to work because Isaac comes over eight nights a month. Um…don’t blame Isaac for your joblessness. At this rate, Isaac will have a part-time job before Jo does! Maybe 16-year-old Isaac can hire his Dear Ol’ Dad down at the McDonald’s? Isaac can be his McBoss!
Drew’s not buying Jo’s excuses.
“Do I need to work?” Jo asks.
Drew then asks how the heck Jo survives without having a job. Um…Drew? You know that piece of paper that comes in your mailbox every so often that says “Viacom” in the lefthand corner? Well, Jo gets one of those too. So, there’s your answer.
Oh, and obviously, his mixtape sales are helping him keep up his balla lifestyle. Obviously.
Kail is actually trying to be kind to Jo and even lets a few of his comments go without calling him out on his ridiculousness. To really stir that pot, Drew brings out Javi and a pregnant Vee to get their opinions on things.
Javi insists that he’s not worried that Rappin’ Jo is gonna steal his woman. Drew is really trying to stir up trouble, and keeps bringing up the fact that Kail isn’t interested in Jo and Vee’s new baby. Since she’s already addressed this subject about four times in the last 20 minutes, Kail looks livid.
Again, Kail explains that she doesn’t hate Vee’s baby, and Drew still isn’t satisfied. When Vee reveals that she’s having a baby girl, Drew legit leans over to Kail and goes, “Jealous?”
Seriously, Drew, why you gotta be such a seventh grade girl? Let it go, man!
He finally gives up on Kail & Co., hoping that Jenelle will bring the heat in terms of hot mess-ism.
Jenelle comes out (wearing some sort of dress-like thing that looks like something you’d find in a Halloween costume package emblazoned with “Hottie Naughty Housewife” on the front). Drew isn’t distracted by Jenelle’s blatant cleavage, however. He gets right down to business, confronting Jenelle about the mess she’s made of her life.
We watch some clips (once again getting to see “Jeneeeeeellle!“) which make Jenelle emotional. Is Jenelle crying over the clips about her not having her son, Jace? Nooo. Is Jenelle crying because her relationship with her mom is in turmoil? Nooo. She’s crying, of course, because her nitwit ex-fiance found another girl’s back to hitch his boner to.
Drew brings up that Jenelle and Nathan have been doing this back-and-forth dance (as well as the occasional Horizontal Mambo) for years now. She announces that she and Nathan are giving things another go (mind you this was taped back in July and they have since broken up). Drew questions her decision to get back with a neanderthal who cheated on her and at one point, ran her over with his truck (or something.)
Jenelle states that it’s strictly a medical issue for her; after all, when she wasn’t with Nathan she was having panic attacks while taking patients’ blood pressure. (Maybe don’t put that on your resume, Jenelle…)
Although they are back together, Jenelle admits that things haven’t been all sex romps and strawberry protein shakes in their relationship. Nate’s been “standoffish” and they still argue constantly.
Drew literally says that listening to Jenelle talk is “traumatizing” him. He is just getting started though. He next calls Jenelle out for popping out so many kids.
“So…two kids already? And you’re 23?” Drew asks. (Just wait til ya get to Leah, Doc!)
Jenelle insists that no more spawn will be birthed from her loins for at least three more years.
Next they bring out Nathan, who got all dressed up for his appearance. While he does have sleeves on his shirt, he is wearing red bathing suit trunks, flip flops and a baseball cap. Never before did I think I’d long for Nathan’s lime green wetsuit top, but even that would be more appropriate than this outfit!
Jenelle and Nathan don’t even get a chance to start filming. Before they even go “on air,” Jenelle gets mad at Nathan because he’s not sitting close enough to her (or something?) and she storms off set. We get to go behind-the-scenes to watch Jenelle throw a tantrum to the producers and refuse to film.
We next get an onscreen message that says Jenelle has refused to return to the stage, after 10 minutes of Drew, Nathan, the crew and the poor shivering audience members waiting around for her. Nathan says that Jenelle is mad because Nathan said she was playing “the victim card.”
Since Jenelle is MIA, the producer comes on stage to beg Nathan to beg Jenelle to come back and fulfill what she’s contractually obligated to do. Nathan agrees (he was probably promised a week’s supply of supplements for his efforts). Finally, Nathan convinces Jenelle to come back out. The audience freaking claps for Jenelle as she walks back on stage. Seriously? SERIOUSLY?!
Drew seems to have a hard time understanding why the hell Jenelle is being such a baby. The doctor encourages them to go to counseling, especially because Jenelle is so insecure about Nathan having the other girl around. Jenelle tells Drew that she’s going to hurl. (By all means, don’t throw up on Nathan’s fancy outfit! That would be a tragedy to lose such fine frocks!)
Drew then asks the lovebirds if there has ever been any physical violence between them.
Drew looks like he’s one minute away from throwing up his hands, yelling “Eff this! I’m going back to my HLN show!” and walking off set (Jenelle style). Instead, he presses forward. He encourages them to see a therapist–STAT!
At long last, they finally bring Barbara out! Babs is looking spiffy in her “caaaaareer woman lookin'” sweater set. They bring up the Jace custody situation, and Babs says she’s afraid of putting Jace into Jenelle’s madhouse. Jenelle insists that Barb kept Jace from her because she didn’t like Nathan.
“Nathan does not like me, Docta Drew!” Barb says.
Nathan insists that he does like Babs and even offers to lay one on her.
“You wanna kiss right now?” he asks her.
Ew. Also, Ew. Keep your nasty cold-sore-stained lips off our Babs, Nathan!
Nate insists that, because he’s a Christian (?), he doesn’t hate anyone. Babs is quick to point out that His Holiness Nate is very Christian when he is cheatin’, fornicatin’ and drinkin’. Oh, and chokin’ Jenelle when she was pregnant.
Things start to get tense on stage. Dr. Drew tries to straighten things out, but Barb isn’t buying Nathan’s crap.
Barb says that she gave up her own life to raise Jace and keep him out of foster care. Jenelle, of course, takes this as an attack.
“Look at you!” Jenelle shouts at her mother. “You work at the Walmart deli, while I’m going to be a medical assistant and save people’s lives, while you serve f**king food!”
Oh.No.You.Did.NOT just say that to our Babs!
Honestly, I half expected Dr. Drew’s girthy paw to come swinging out from the side of the TV and smack Jenelle across the face. The Ashley’s blood is a-boilin’ right now!
Jenelle storms out again, screaming that Babs is putting her down. (Um…wasn’t Jenelle the one that was making fun of Barb’s job?)
Jenelle plows through the stage doors and refuses to come back out. MTV busts out the classic ‘Teen Mom’ line, “I’m done!” and lets her go.
Next week, we get to watch as the Docta takes on Chelsea, Leah and all of their crews!
To read The Ashley’s recaps of previous ‘Teen Mom 2’ episodes, click here!