‘Teen Mom OG’ Season 5B Premiere Recap: Butch (and Those Broads) are Back!

"Freedom tastes a lot like fried breakfast meat!"
“Freedom tastes a lot like fried breakfast meat!”

Well, friends, here we are again. It’s been more than half a decade since we watched Maci, Amber, Catelynn and Farrah shoot a kid from their teenage loins (that sounded unintentionally creepy, sorry), and yet we are still here, invested in what’s going on in their lives.

The new season of Teen Mom OG premiered this week with a double episode spectacular. While viewers are excited to watch two episodes instead of one, The Ashley is overwhelmed! That’s a lot of Farrah ugly cries and Ryan yawns to recap, y’all!

However, one thing has motivated The Ashley to push on and recap as much of this crap as possible: Butch is free! Yes, kids, everyone’s favorite jailbird grandpa has finally been released from the clink, so it would be wrong for The Ashley not to celebrate his freedom with a recap.

Let’s get things started before Butch violates his parole by whipping someone with his salty mullet!

The episode kicks off with a recap of last season: Amber and Gary fighting, more illegitimate pregnancies, Maci pretending to quit ‘Teen Mom,’ and Farrah being generally terrible.

Now that we’re caught up, we start with the new footage. All of the girls have gotten snazzy new intro photos to showcase their various new hair colors and styles.

We start off with Amber, who is excited to see the ‘Teen Mom’ crew. She explains that she and her Insta-fiance Matt have moved into a new house, and that things are still rocky with Gary in regard to custody over Leah.

Gary comes over to Casa de Portwood to pick up Leah for a vacation. Later, Amber is saddened by the fact that she doesn’t have the same rights to Leah as Gary does. Matt (who is clearly a model citizen when it comes to dealing with his own child custody cases) suggests Amber get a lawyer to fight Gary for custody of Leah.

That face you make when you realize you'd have a bigger house if you'd gotten pregnant at 16.
That face the producer makes when she realizes she’d have a bigger house if she’d gotten pregnant at 16.

Meanwhile, in Tennessee, Maci has shot out another kid in the off-season. She’s also moved into what looks like a mansion. (It’s amazing what MTV money can buy, y’all!)  She explains to Bentley that she’s over the whole “don’t put my kid on the same show as Farrah’s backdoor” thing, so he gets to be filmed again.

She and Ryan are still struggling to get along. (Ryan is apparently still struggling just to stay awake long enough to yawn and spit a few times on camera so he can collect that check!)

"Y'all think you can just push me in a rollaway bed through the race course?"
“Y’all think you can just push me in a rollaway bed through the race course?”

Maci has invited Ryan to do a mud run with her, Taylor and their friends. Ryan agrees, but doesn’t look too thrilled about having to get out of bed and go splash around in the mud with his ex and her new baby-daddy. Go figure.

Over in Michigan, Catelynn and Tyler are dealing with parenting Nova, their infant daughter. The producer, ever-anxious to drudge up the past, asks Cate and Ty if they would have completely lost it if they had chosen to parent Carly as teens. They agree that they would have been crappy parents.

The producer then starts talking about what we all really care about—Butch! He’s getting sprung from prison in two days, after spending four years behind bars. The producer asks Tyler how he feels about Butch getting out, given that Butch wasn’t supportive of Carly being adopted.

"I wonder if I can sell clippings of my dad's mullet on eBay to pay for the wedding?"
“I wonder if I can sell clippings of my dad’s mullet on eBay to pay for the wedding?”

Tyler brings up how weird it is that Butch was fine with stealing crap and getting doped up (but ‘member kids, he “ain’t no juicehead” as he told us many moons ago), yet he was totally against anyone giving up their children. Still, Tyler and Catelynn are positive that Butch can make better decisions and turn his life around. They are also excited that Butch will be able to attend their upcoming wedding.

Finally, we check in with Farrah. She’s just split up with her boyfriend from last season, Simon, but is now regretting it because… well, think of all those pregnancy scare and wedding stories she’s missing out on being a part of!

She goes to meet Simon, and Sophia demands that Farrah take her along. Farrah denies her request, but Sophia basically tells her mom to screw off. She runs and gets in Farrah’s Backdoormobile and refuses to get out.

"I wanna go see your fake boyfriend TOOOOO!"
“I wanna go see your fake boyfriend TOOOOO!”

She’s eventually pulled out of the car kicking and screaming. (Oddly, I have a feeling that’s how the crew of ‘Teen Mom’ is taken out of their cars when they know they have to work with Farrah.)

Anyway, she meets up with Simon at some random park (because…it is ‘Teen Mom’ after all…where else would these people go to talk?)

Upon arriving, Farrah immediately complains about 1) how low the bench is 2) how stinky the park is and 3) everything. After shooting at the park for one minute, Simon demands his MTV-paid-for meal. (Hey, if this dude is willing to talk to Farrah, he at least deserves a free bloomin’ onion for his troubles!)

"I've made a huge mistake."
“No free meal is worth putting up with this crap. Sorry guys.”

Before they go, however, Farrah enlightens us as to why she and Simon are not together. She says that Simon’s immature, selfish and doesn’t think about anyone but himself.

I’m sorry…what?

We have just entered the Twilight Zone, folks.

Simon tells Farrah she has an “attitude problem” and Farrah denies that.

Seriously, though, no one has a worse attitude than Farrah. Literally, she makes Mussolini look like Mother Teresa.

As she and Simon are walking away, Simon wonders what kind of fish could be caught in the lake they are at.

Obviously, Producer Heather was not able to secure a hairbrush in the off-season...
Obviously, Producer Heather was not able to secure a hairbrush in the off-season…

“I don’t know,” Farrah replies curtly. “Dead fish.”

No lie, I’d rather splash around in a lake full of dead fish than have one meal with Farrah.

On the way to the restaurant, Farrah calls up a show producer to whine about how immature Simon is. She does this by calling him every name used on a third grade playground. As you do…

He's like the hillbilly George Clooney!
He’s like the hillbilly George Clooney!

Back in Tennessee, we see that Ryan has legit turned full-on gray-headed in the off-season.

OK, let’s stop right there for a sec. Hey, MTV—don’t you think this “Teen Mom” thing has gone a little too far? You have now legit followed these people so long that their hair has literally turned gray! Will there be future episodes showing Catelynn buying her first cane? Maci plans a wild party at her new senior citizen home? COME ON!

Anyway, back to Ryan and his gray hair. It should come as no surprise that he didn’t bother to dye his hair when he noticed it turning gray. I mean, this is a man whose mom probably has to come in and turn him every 12 hours so he doesn’t get bedsores from napping so much. What makes you think he’d take the time to dye his hair!?

Miraculously, though, on this day, Ryan is helping his dad do yard work. Again, I’m convinced this episode takes place fully in the Twilight Zone.

"I mean, if he drowns in mud pit, they can't blame me, right?"
“I mean, if he drowns in mud pit, they can’t blame me, right?”

Meanwhile, Maci is hanging out with her friend. She tells her friend that while she and Taylor are mud running, Baby Jayde will be at Ryan’s parent’s house. Maci explains that Jen and Larry are like her second parents, so it’s not weird. Maci also explains that she invited Ryan to do the mud run with them because she wants to make her co-parenting relationship with him stronger.

Maci’s friend seems surprised (mostly that Ryan is actually willing to use his legs), but is supportive of that idea. They do joke that they plan to drown Ryan in the mud at some point during the run, though, so there’s that.

Back at Catelynn and Tyler’s house, the phone’s a’ringin’ and it’s Butch, calling from the clink. Butch is excited about his release and Tyler is…being really weird. He’s talking like he just inhaled a bunch of helium or something. Perhaps he’s making his voice so high on purpose, in hopes that he can get work as a voice actor when this whole MTV thing goes to crap?

"If he waves his mullet around me, I might swoon!"
“If he waves his mullet around me, I might swoon!”

While Tyler’s happy about his dad’s release, it will cause some trouble for Catelynn and her mother, April. As we all remember, April was once married to Butch. Their relationship, of course, was just a blur of Budweiser, bad tattoos and domestic violence (naturally), so they eventually divorced. April has since remarried, but she is still nervous about seeing Butch, who was once her knight-in-shining-mullet.

The next day, Cate is watching all of the random kids in her family (most of whom I actually have no clue who they actually belong to), while Tyler hits the road to go collect Butch at the prison. The kids are all making “Welcome Home” signs for Butch. (Surprisingly, no one wrote “Try not to f**k it up this time” in puffy paint on the sign.)

Oh my God. It's better than I could have ever hoped...
Oh my God. It’s better than I could have ever hoped…

Tyler arrives at the prison and a few moments later, out comes Butch—wild haired and wild eyed. (With all that gray hair, I at first thought Tyler was picking up Ryan!)

While The Ashley is thrilled to see Butch, she’s sad that he has chosen to grow the sides of his hair out and thus, lost the salt-n-peppa mullet we all know and love.

“You look like damn Einstein!” Tyler tells him.

After telling the cameras that he’s now “free and single!” Butch is treated to a meal at Michigan’s finest greasy spoon diner. Over fried breakfast product, Butch tells Tyler the rules of his parole. He’s not allowed to leave the state, have drugs or alcohol or, you know, beat anyone up.

Butch is most excited to meet Nova…and apparently, smell her diaper. (Prison has turned you weird, Butchy.)

Butch shows the kids how much his hair has grown since he entered the clink.
Butch shows the kids how much his hair has grown since he entered the clink.

Finally, Butch and Tyler arrive home, and the litters of children are all thrilled to see Butch. (Also…just how many kids does Tyler’s sister have these days? Just sayin’…)

There are kids, dogs and gray hair flyin’ everywhere while Butch reunites with everyone.

Butch, a regular jailbird Santa Claus, has brought gifts for all the little girls and boys. Yes, folks, he’s made stuffed animals out of his prison socks for all the kiddies.

You can’t make this stuff up. (But, to be fair, the gesture was sweet and…the sock stuffed animals were damn cute.)

Later, Tyler reveals that Carly, Brandon and Teresa will all be at the wedding.

"Kids love me!"
“Kids love me!”

“So I get to meet Carly?” Butch asks.

You can almost see it in Tyler’s face that he wants to keep his jailbird pop as far from Carly as possible, but he tells Butch “yes” anyway.

He does, however, give his dad a few tips on how to deal with Carly and her parents. For instance, he tells him not to bum-rush the Whitebreads, and perhaps not to tell anyone about his four years in the pen. (Sorry Butch; No one wants to hear your story about what happens in the prison showers.)

In Tennessee, it’s time for the mud run. Maci and Taylor arrive at Ryan’s house to drop off Jayde and pick up Ryan. Unfortunately, though, Ryan is still asleep.

"Don't he wanna run in the mud?"
“Don’t he wanna run in the mud?”

I’ll give you a minute to get over your shock…

Maci and Taylor decide to leave, sans Ryan. He eventually stumbles out into the living room and Bentley tells him that Maci is leaving without him. He goes out to their truck and tells him that even though he “feels like ass” he will meet them at the run.

It’s time for the run to start and, shockingly, Ryan is nowhere in sight. They start the run without him, and finish before Ryan’s even been turned over in his bed.

Back in Texas, Farrah has arrived home after being rejected by Simon. Farrah’s “friend” Paola (which is pronounced “Pay-ol-a” which is convenient given that MTV probably had to pay her to hang out with Farrah) comes for a visit.

"I'll need payment up front, please."
“I’ll need payment up front, please.”

Farrah is shocked that Simon hasn’t asked to see Sophia. Um…the dude doesn’t even want to see you, Farrah, why the hell would he want to see your child?

Sophia comes outside so the forced conversation about Simon has to stop. For some reason, Sophia is speaking like some sort of alien/robot and can barely be understood. She’s whining that Farrah didn’t bring Simon over to play with her. (Meanwhile, Simon’s jetting away on the first flight out of Texas.)

Later that week, Farrah goes to San Diego to attend the wedding of a friend. Simon will be there too, so Farrah’s brought along Sophia and her dad Michael to keep her company.

Unfortunately for Farrah, the friend refused to allow her to bring her great big ol’ camera crew to the wedding. (Farrah’s backdoor, however, was invited.)

"That's weird. The card reads, 'To my best friend and bridesmaid.'"
“That’s weird. The card reads, ‘To my best friend and bridesmaid.'”

The next day, Farrah shows off all of the rose bouquets that were supposedly sent to her by Simon. (Anyone else think it’s a bit suspicious that he sent multiple bouquets that look exactly the same? Did he, like, mug all of the bridesmaids at the end of the night and demand their bouquets?)

Farrah says that she and Simon reconnected at the wedding and they had a great night. (See what living life off-camera can do, Farrah?!) She says that there may be a chance of them getting back together. Simon invites Farrah to go to dinner with him.

They meet up at a restaurant and Farrah immediately asks him what he wants to do with their relationship. It can’t be all flowers and fake fights on camera, after all. Simon says he’s in no rush to be in a relationship, and Farrah gets super defensive, of course. Simon’s trying to shovel in as much of his free salmon meal as he can before he storms out on this lunatic.

"Must.Eat.All.Free.Fish."
“Must.Eat.All.Free.Fish.”

Farrah starts cussing at Simon, yelling at him and being hostile, and Simon checks out. He says that he’s tired of Farrah interrupting him. She denies doing this (while interrupting, of course) and calls Simon a bitch. As you do.

Simon tells the production crew he’s done, and Farrah storms out. Simon tells the crew that Farrah’s crazy.

Oh, tear out the front page!

Over in Indiana, Amber’s gone to see a lawyer about getting joint custody of Leah. She explains to the lawyer that, yeah, she was in prison and was a great big ol’ drug addict and stuff, but she’s since changed her life and wants her daughter back. The lawyer says that this is a completely possible option for Amber.

Matt is the original "Lazy Boy."
Matt is the original “Lazy Boy.”

A few days later, Leah is home from vacation is going to spend the night at Amber’s house. Matt and Amber are, of course, lounging on the couch when Leah and Gary arrives. Unfortunately, Leah doesn’t really want to spend the night at Amber’s house. She tells Gary that she wants to go home with him, which disappoints Amber. Still, she lets Leah go with Gary.

Amber’s confused why Leah is acting like that. Leah, however, explains to Gary’s wife Kristina that Amber “makes her upset” because Amber is “not fun like” them. Leah also reveals that all Amber wants to do is hang out with Matt.

“She sleeps longer and she’s always at the house all the time,” Leah says of Amber.

Amber's lamp needs some Viagra...
Amber’s lamp needs some Viagra…

Meanwhile, Gary and Amber are inside chatting about what just happened. Gary thinks that Leah should be forced to stay at Amber’s, and Amber argues that this is why she needs to have 50/50 custody of Leah. Gary says there are plenty of reasons why he shouldn’t let Amber have custody, but he won’t get into specifics.

I’ll say it then: one big reason is that giant lump ‘o’ mooch on your couch, Amber.

They are luckily both trying to avoid an argument, which is good. (No one is throwing TV’s, so there’s that!)

Meanwhile, Maci and Taylor talk about how Ryan’s a big pile of loser for missing the mud run and basically crapping on their attempt to be friends with him. They decide, however, to keep trying to be nice to Ryan, for Bentley’s sake.

New season...same ol' show...
New season…same ol’ show…

“It’s like seven years later and still the same,” Maci says.

That’s essentially the best description for this episode, actually. To be honest, this whole damn show!

There’s a second episode but…The Ashley won’t be recapping it. She will be back for Episode 3 though!

(Photos: MTV)

92 Comments

  1. Every time I see Farrah, Sophia and Debra together I can’t help but picture poor Michael hiding in a dark closet, rocking back and forth and mumbling to himself.


  2. To everyone on this thread who expects Caitlyn to be pursuing a nice body and be happy and career oriented: she grew up with addiction and no role models for delayed gratification and self discipline. Like her, I grew up with addiction and a experienced regular sexual abuse. In my teens and twenties I really wanted a nice body. I found I could do that but I was not able to handle men looking at me so I gained weight. It was easier on me. I stay healthy but keep the weight. I have been in therapy for years. It happens.


  3. Ok…..is it obvious to anyone else that Leah has become a compulsive manipulator as a result of her parent’s immaturity? All season she has been telling Amber she wants to stay and live with her, and then telling Gary and his wife she wants to stay and live with them. I feel like she’s pitting them against each other – only six so she doesn’t know its bad, I think its legitimately the coping strategy she’s developed as a way to feel like her parents care about her, by pitting them against each other. She’s probably learned the only time when she’s the absolute center of attention is when those cameras are there. Even on the Being Amber special, she was so happy to see her Mom, but in the same episode asked Kristina if she could call her Mom


    1. I totally thought this too! Especially after Leah told Amber that Gary did nothing with her in Disney; that it was only Kristina and the new baby with her at the parks.


    2. I got the same impression. I really do wish Amber, Gary, and Leah would go to family counseling. Whether they like it or not, The three of them are still a family even though they aren’t together. They have never been able to co-parent in a healthy manner and it’s clear just how much that has affected Leah. Situations like this don’t just get better on their own. It will only get worse. They need to work out their issues now, just the three of them, without the biased opinions of SOs, family members, and friends.


  4. Sophia makes me cringe so much. I know it’s not her fault but I could probably not stand being around her for maybe 3 minutes top.


  5. When Farrah cries about Daddy Derek o just cant. Didn’t she hide the pregnancy from him and change her number? And she won’t let his family see sophia? Niki Minaj is right about her


  6. Does anyone else find it weird how Farrah is trying to force some kind of relationship between Sophia and Simon. I just don’t get why she would think he needs to visit her daughter if they broke up. Forcing someone to take on a daddy role they aren’t ready for is a disaster waiting to happen. She’s going to have to get back into porn to pay for Sophia’s therapy


    1. LOL! Farrah is definitely trying to force this relationship between Simon and Sophia, but he doesn’t seem to really even like or have the patience for Sophia. One Farrah is probably enough for him and Sophia is nothing but a mini Farrah that will physically attack. And something is super off with Farrah and Simon as a couple. I feel like he is on her payroll, along with Debbie and Michael. He’s not very affectionate with Farrah or Sophia, and always looks like he’s super dazed and confused (which he probably is from him dealing with Farrah’s random verbal attacks and Sophia’s physical attacks on the regular). I don’t believe he is looking for fame the way Nathan or Matt are/were just from his body language on camera, and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t get paid THAT MUCH by MTV. The only explanation I can come up with as to why he’s even around is because she’s paying him a ton of money, or hes equally as bat shit crazy as she is….or both.


  7. What’s the point of recapping if you’re going to skip episodes? I’ve never understood that. “Oh I just don’t feel like it. We’ll skip one and just do the one after…. Maybe….. If I feel like it.” Lame.


    1. @Lola- It takes hours to do a proper recap, and there were three big shows premiering in one night. I refuse to do a half-assed recap; I’d rather not do it if I can’t give it the snarkiness it deserves. -The Ashley


      1. I was going through Ashley recap withdrawal when it took so long to recap… I’m just glad one was done!! I live for these!! Hahhah maybe not live, but looking forward to them sure does get me through the work day!! Thanks Ashley, I hope you recap all the episodes in the future, but I’m thankful for this piece of gold!! 😀


      2. I personally don’t care if you don’t have the time to recap every episode, I appreciate the ones you do have the time for. Between the hilarity of your recaps and captioned screenshots, and the fact that you take the time to verify everything, The Ashley’s Reality Roundup is by far the best reality tv gossip site. Thank you for all of the entertainment and laughs you have provided.


  8. I feel like Leah is playing both her parents – I can’t remember if it was in the previews or second episode, but she was seen telling amber she didn’t want to go to Gary’s for the same reasons. Seeking attention with all the changes?


    1. She is, and the sides probably encourage it. Obviously Gary and his wife were TOTALLY EATING IT UP when she was bitching about Amber being boring or a bad mom. Amber was actually more mature, IMO, to just let Leah go where she wants. But the thing is, at that age, they need boundaries and they need routine, she shouldn’t get to pick & choose. Can’t believe I agree with Amber. If she’d just ditch Matt, she could help herself and her kid have a normal, consistent life. INSTEAD, both parents are allowing Leah to start with duysfunctionality at a young age!


  9. Caitlyn has issues, Amber has issues, Maci has issues and boy, Farrah has a subscription! I always say that we all have our foibles, some are just more visible than others. If it makes you feel good that you are better than Caitlyn because you effectively manage your weight than I guess you can see not everyone thinks the same.


  10. Farrah is a hot mess. Everybody knows that she sent herself all of those flowers lol….and does anyone else think that Simon doesn’t really like Sophia? I get that vibe from him.


      1. pahaha!! Oh I know. It just trips me out that Farrah tries to shove Sophia down his throat…that blind person who can do a better job taking care of Sophia than Debbie, would be able to see that he doesn’t really like “the kid”. Sophia is a huge brat for sure…And another thing, I’m trying to figure out Simon’s motive. He seems pretty uncomfortable in front of the camera, so I dunno if it’s the fame hes after…maybe money? I think Farrah’s paying him to be her boyfriend.


  11. There is a petition on change.org to have Farrah kicked off the show. Last time I looked it had over 17,000 signatures.


    1. Did you see the twitter war between Nikki Minaj and Farrah? Haha! It was pretty funny. While I’m not a fan of either, Nikki really put her in her place!


  12. I would like to comment on Amber for a second. She was wondering why Leah was acting so weird and decided it had to be because Gary was saying negative things to Leah about her. Maybe the fact that Leah now has a new little sister is causing this behaviour? ( Yes, I am Canadian and that is how we spell it.) Leah might not want to leave Gary, because she is afraid that Emilee will get all of her love and attention while she is gone. Also Kristina and Gary form a stable family unit that Leah was part of during the years that Amber was absent from Leah’s life. She has sisters to play with and adults that actively parent all of them as a unit. They go to parks and Disney, Amber and Matt go nowhere.


    1. I felt like Leah was playing Amber and Gary off against each other. She told Kristina that Amber sleeps in and doesn’t leave the house, but then she told Amber that Gary ignored her at Disneyland.

      I don’t think Gary is behind the behaviour – I think Leah is deliberately causing trouble on both sides, probably for attention.


      1. For sure agree, Leah seems a little manipulative, but it probably does stem from all of the attention not being on her anymore with the new baby that Gary and Kristina have.


        1. I think it’s a coping mechanism from long before the new baby. I think she has no idea what she’s doing, it comes naturally to her because the best ways her parents show her they love her is by fighting over her, it’s what she’s used to. Also, it was probably sadly very easy to pick up emotional manipulation from her father


      2. that’s exactly what my husband said, leah’s playing them like a fiddle isn’t she lol. she should have been made to stay, it’s not amber’s job to entertain her 24/7 and she needs to get that. maybe amber should do more for her instead of letting matt do it (which i have a hard time believing as she’s always fixing leah’s hair etc.) i’m sure she has her reasons even she probably doesn’t realize lol. poor sophia is a head case. seems like she’s thinking act like a baby, talk cute, be funny, so mommy will like you. simon def wants nothing to do with her. farrah’s so dumb not to see how pushing it is just ruining everything. you finally found a guy willing to deal with you and you force your kid on him, physically, then berate him relentlessly! real smart farrah


        1. It’s no wonder she acts like a weird hybrid child baby, that’s how Farrah treats her. One moment she’s talking in silly voices and carrying Sophia around like a baby, the next she’s crying to her about relationships as if Sophia was an adult.

          I quite like Amber but she’s another one who is bad for the baby voices – I wonder if being away for so long she just doesn’t realise Leah is grown up? I hate when she calls her MyLeeeah constantly… or worse, BooBoo. We know she made a BooBoo when she got pregnant, we don’t need a reminder every episode!

          Speaking of accidental pregnancies and inappropriate conversations with children… I wonder if Leah remembers that time when Gary told her that Emilee was an accident. That’s a sharp weapon to give to an older sister.


          1. lmao, indeed, my sister never let me forget she had the good life with her own room before i came along and ruined it. yes, farrah and the ‘my little coconut’, ‘my little booboo baby’ etc etc is SO beyond annoying, right on par with amber’s ‘ooosky booboo!’ like, really? they’re 6 years old, cut it out already and maybe they’ll act a little more mature.


        2. You can’t blame a 7 year old for her behaviors. No one is correcting them and teaching her how to act properly. It’s not her fault. She’s just developing really bad life skills..


      3. I kind of felt like she was trying to not hurt Amber’s feelings, so she said that she didn’t get to spend time with Gary. Also, not being mean at all, but Gary is too large to cover the whole park, and possibly too large to ride most of the attractions, so that is more than likely why he “didn’t walk with them or ride anything” He has a scooter/wheelchair lift on the back of his vehicle, and was recently papped with a handicapped tag, so I’m thinking that was the reason for this scene. Not saying she isn’t or wouldn’t pit the two parents against each other like that, but in this specific case, I think she was trying to save hurting her mom’s feelings.


    1. If there is one thing you can count on in this world, it’s the comical antics and one-liners of Butch and Babs


  13. When is Maci going to stop trying to control Ryan? For someone who has another man in her life; she sure worries about Ryan…and I dont think shes doing it purely for Bentlys sake. You cant make someone do something they dont want to do Maci. Stop being such a nag and focus on your new man. You’re a very controlling young lady. Move on Maci


    1. That has to do with Mtv. When they film the show, the producers tell them what to talk about a lot. Its not like they have a script but they’ll say something like, “Can you guys talk about Ryan and what he’s been up to? What’s been going on with him lately?”


      1. Disagree. I think she still loves him but she’s moved in to Taylor because Ryan will never be anything more than a mooch in his parents house.


  14. Farrah is a NIGHTMARE!!! I cannot stand her and have no idea why she acts like such a giant bitch to everyone! Supposedly her parents were abusive to her (I don’t know that I believe her). However, unless they kept her locked in a dungeon there is no reason for her anti-christ attitude. Seriously, wtf happened to her?!? She can change her outside all she wants, but she will always be a miserable person. Sorry end rant…I just can’t stand her!


      1. Probably Farrah or her family…I can’t imagine that she has many fans (at least outside of the porn industry).


    1. There was a time where I was actually somewhat proud of Farrah. I know it makes me throw up in my mouth a little to admit that now, but it’s true. I think it was season 2 of teen mom. In that season she was working at a pizza place and going to school. She had her own apartment and it was rough but she was actually trying to “pull herself up from her boot straps.” I mean there was actually a scene of her trying to see her own clothes to save $. Then when she got scammed out of her $ and had to move back in with her parents that’s when it seemed like she turned into the mega b*tch we all know now. Don’t get me wrong her attitude still sucked back then but at least she was trying to be independent in a way her, her family and Sofia could be proud of.


  15. I’m honestly discusted and shocked at how fat Caitlynn has become. And go ahead and down vote me and lecture me on how I’m “fat shaming.”. I’m not going to be politically correct here. She looks absolutely horrible. I’m the scenes of her from 5 years ago she was gorgeous and vibrant looking. She looks aged, haggered and like the life had been sucked out of her.

    Tyler – he’s not hot but he’s not a bad looking guy. Two individuals who never experienced anyone else in life is a recipe for disaster. I think they will always love one another in a codependent way but I do think at some point down the line once the cameras and fame disappear they will crave and fantasize another life. After all they are in their early 20s and have been bound to the hip. They are codependent.

    My husband and I dated from the time we were 17 until 20, broke up to focus on our education and for back togtehrr when we were 23 – we spent 3 years focusing on ourselfs, dating other people and experiencing life so I do believe high school sweethearts can make it but experiencing life outside of each other is one of the most important things being so young.


      1. I sound like a great person because I’m not being politically correct. Caitlyn is fat. No ifs, ands or butts.

        Head over to teen mom junkies – when every person is replying saying the same thing – I’m certainly not the only person expressing that opinion.


        1. So what if she’s fat? I’m fat too. I wish I wasn’t fat but dieting is a lot easier said than done. Being fat doesn’t define me as a person and it doesn’t define Catelynn as a person. Nobody’s perfect. Everyone has flaws. Being overwieght is just a flaw that is visible to the naked eye. I applaud Tyler for accepting and loving Catelynn despite her appearance.


          1. Being overweight and obese is unhealthy regardless of personality. No one should ever be on a diet. It’s called eating healthy, portion control and exercise.

            People can comment all they want, it doesn’t change the fact that she’s fat, looks haggered and isn’t taking care of her body


          2. Well, it sounds like you really have something against fat people which is fine. That’s your choice. Being overweight is not a good thing, I never said it was. You are not in Catelynn’s situation though. You don’t know if there has or hasn’t been effort on her part to get healthy. There are people that actually do try to lose weight but it’s a struggle for them.


          3. I like you.
            And Catelynn seems to accept and love Tyler despite his helium-voiced Jim Carrey-ness, let’s not forget that she deserves some applause.
            And Geniebeanie, if it’s not *just* excess adipose tissue that bugs you, let’s hear about your take on Macy’s what sounds like binge-drinking. Because that sure as hell isn’t a healthy decision.


          4. Geniebeanie ~ You have NO clue what health issues she has. *As an example* I used to be 130 soaking wet (5’6). I was then diagnosed with Graves disease and had my thyroid removed. I now eat better, control portions and exercise more than I ever have. I am still at 170 because of this. How about you know what’s going on with people before you straight up judge what their lives are like behing closed doors? Too much? Tough shit.


        2. Exchange “politically correct” with “insulting” and that’s what you are. It’s OK to point out that she gained weight, if that bothers you so much. It’s NOT OK for you to complain, bitch, whine and criticize her over it. It’s NOT OK to judge someone by their looks. You want to be offensive, not non-PC, there’s a difference.


      2. You’re overly obsessed with this issue. I read The Ashley’s page religiously and I’ve noticed you commenting on Caitlyn’s weight every chance you get, even on articles that have nothing to do with her! It’s weird and annoying, you’ve said what you’ve had to say about her, now move on!


        1. Some people are just naturally thin. I used to have that body type, but as I have gotten older my metabolism had slowed down. It is easy to think everyone should be thin, but Catelyn does not seem to have that body type.


        2. I think she’s obsessed out of jealousy – in her own words she said she and her husband were high school sweethearts, broke up then got back together, I think she’s jealous Cautlynn made it longer than she did, probably her man cheated/dumped her at some point and she still harbors anger over that, needs to convince other people that ‘her way’ of dating is correct. Caitlynn being overweight probably is more salt in the wound.


          1. Yeah, she strangely seems to imply that overweight women don’t deserve to be loved by attractive men? Tell that to my fiancé? He loves me just the way I am, and it makes me want to work even harder to lose weight, knowing I have that support and love from him unconditionally is ESSENTIAL. To believe that women don’t deserve that because of looks is honestly just really sad.


    1. I don’t know about you but when I popped out a kid, all the weight I gained didn’t magically fall off 6 weeks later. I am also sure you would have been horrified by the dark circles under my eyes for the next 6 years, until mine learned how to fall asleep and stay asleep consistently. Caitlyn may have postpartum depression. They may discuss this on the next episode. Also, breast feeding is exhausting and it is a full-time job. I didn’t run to the gym as soon as the bleeding stopped to work on my glutes and abs. I am glad I wasn’t in the public eye in those days having to hear about my “flaws” from people online. Women need to build each other up, not tear each other down.


      1. I’m gonna have to agree with geniebeanie on this. Caitlyn doesn’t seem happy in life in general and marrying Tyler was simply her clinging to someone who would give her love. I don’t think either of them are happy and are simply going through the motions. Reading comments in other threads (teen mom junkie) most people agree it’s not a healthy relationship.


        1. Some of you grew up in a household where you had self-discipline and delayed gratification as behaviors modeled for you on a regular basis. Caitlyn more than likely did not see this at all, as she grew up in a household with rampant addiction and all that holds. Please don’t be so judgemental because you have no demons that keep you from pursuing happiness and health.


      2. Some of us actually took care of our bodies during pregnancy. Caitlyn didn’t take care of her body during pregnancy and clearly doesn’t now. I’ve had 3 children and had 10 lbs on me after the birth which fell off within 8 weeks. If you have more tune 15 lbs of weight on your body during pregnancy then your the problem. pregnancy I’d not a reason to gorge. One should only be consuming an extra 200-300 calories a day during pregnancy.


        1. Congratulations. I was on bedrest. It sucked. I don’t judge people for their bodies because everyone’s got his or her own issues. I don’t need a flat stomach to be happy and healthy. Some of the best people I know are overweight.


          1. Being a good person and physical health are completely different things. Obesity is linked to an entire host of other issues – one of which caitlynn experienced during pregnancy. Our society really should judge st some point, our obesity epidemic is getting out of control.


        2. I developed gestational diabetes during my first pregnancy. I was not overeating, but I had a high risk pregnancy to begin with. With the diabetes, you carry a lot more fluid as well. It is not as easy to lose the weight as you seem to think.


          1. Gestational diabetes occurs when ones glucose levels are high. You don’t need to be overweight to develop diabetes. It’s called overeating the wrong foods. I think catelynn clearly showed that on the show.


          2. While Catelynn was certainly doing her best to check off as many diabetes risk factors as possible, genetics play a large role in the development of type 2 diabetes. A friend’s dad who was probably 5’8″, 145 lbs and who’d never liked soda because it made his teeth hurt had type 2 diabetes.
            These were the sort of people who non-sarcastically referred to fruit as “nature’s candy”. As well as some vegetables. They’d have been sickening if they weren’t so damn likeable.


          3. Yuppiemom- “Overeating the wrong foods” is a gross simplification of gestational diabetes. Gestational diabetes is actually caused by hormonal changes during pregnancy. The process of digestion produces glucose. Glucose is released into the bloodstream and your pancreas produces insulin. Insulin is a hormone that removes the glucose from your bloodstream and into the cells of your body to provide them with energy. During pregnancy, a woman’s body is subjected to profound hormonal changes. The hormones released into your bloodstream from the placenta actually impair the function of insulin in your body. Insulin becomes less effective at removing glucose from your bloodstream and into cells. This impairment, called insulin resistance, happens to all women during pregnancy. During a healthy pregnancy, a woman’s body is able to produce enough insulin to make up for the decrease in efficiency. Most women don’t even realize their blood glucose levels increase during pregnancy, especially in the 3rd trimester. When a woman’s body can’t produce enough insulin to make up for the insulin resistance, they develop gestational diabetes. Each woman and each pregnancy is different. There are many women who eat a healthy diet throughout their pregnancy and still develop gestational diabetes because more hormones from the placenta are being released. There are also many women who eat a poor diet throughout their pregnancy and never develop gestational diabetes because less hormones from the placenta are being released. While a poor diet makes women more susceptible to gestational diabetes, it is not the cause of gestational diabetes in and of itself


        3. Oh god, YuppieMom is here now too?? Her posts on Starcasm are bad enough! For those of you who don’t know, she enjoys being rude and combative because SHE KNOWS EVERYTHING and the rest of are just always wrong and have no valid thoughts!


      3. Your 100% right
        I’m worried Caitlin might be depressed. ….. I was and gained a ton of weight…… it’s hard to get over it……. plus it’s not like she had a wonderful childhood. ….. She seems so sweet….. sucks she’s stuck with Tyler and april….. too bad Theresa couldn’t also adopt her


    2. Additionally, the word you are looking for is “disgusted,” not discusted. I may not be perfectly proportioned, thanks in part to that darn kid, but darned if I can’t spell.


    3. So you are in your 20’s and can’t spell disgusted…
      Maybe less focus on Teen Mom reruns for you hun and more study on proper spelling as well as less replying to people you don’t even know. That’s just weird!


    4. You’re less than 30 and you speak like that about weight loss and how it should be easy to lose weight.

      LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I’m dead.

      Just wait till you hit 40 kid, then tell me how easy it is to keep a fit body.


    5. & everyone knows darn well that she is not happy with her weight. But she is too lazy and complacent to achieve anything.


      1. exactly. she has excuse after excuse. when the doctor told her she was gaining too much and being pregnant wasn’t a license to eat, it was, i’m not going to not enjoy my pregnancy. i was like, um, you Won’t enjoy it if you develop diabetes and push out a ten pounder! then, it was, tyler’s making me not want to do it by asking all the time, or i just want to clean when the baby sleeps. she used carly as an excuse for 5 years so i guess she has a lifetime excuse now. tyler’s trying very hard to not say anything but come on, he’s a young guy, she’s the only one he gets to see, he wants her to lose weight. it’s not healthy at all and most of all, she’s not happy. she’d feel so much better if she’d just get off the couch and do it.


    1. Rate of pay would also be lower so although COLA is lower, so are peoples take home pay. A nurse in TN could be making 40k while a nurse doing the exact same job in NY would be making 50k.


    2. Catelynn realizes this is her life. She was forced to give up her child, and had to beg a man to marry her. She’s miserable being stu

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