‘Teen Mom 2’ Season 7B Episode 7 Recap: Beach Yoga & Baby Announcements

“Y’all stretch yerselves out now, ya hear?! This lesson ain’t cheap!”

Welcome back to Teen Mom 2, where the uteri work overtime, but the show’s stars well…don’t.

When we last left off pregnant Chelsea and Jenelle were struggling to adjust lives to accommodate their unexpected bundles of joy, while Kail and Javi were trying to figure out a way be around each other without throwing Drake CDs, “Yeezys” and Starbucks cups at the each other’s heads. Leah, meanwhile, is preparing to go on vacation.

The episode kicks off in the good Ol’ WV, where Leah had been trying to get her and her girls to Mexico, but,–ding-dang it!–their passports aren’t going to be completed in time for the trip. Leah decides that she will instead take her kids to a family resort out in The Cal-i-fornia.

It is, of course, not yet known if Grandma Sandy will be traveling with Leah and the girls to California while riding atop of their rental car in a Barkalounger. It’s like the “Beverly Hillbillies” y’all!

Swimmin’ pools…movie stars…

“We aint’ goin’ to Mexico no more because of the dang-gone passports!”

Leah calls up Jeremy, who is thrilled to hear that his daughter won’t be taken to that heathen haven (otherwise known as Mexico).

Later that day, Leahs’ youngin are splashin’ ’round the swimmin’ hole. (Leah has all that MTV money so they done got one of them “above ground” swimmin’ holes like you see on The TV!) They girls did not have any adult supervision, though, so they get into trouble for swimming. (And, as Leah says, “MTV don’t count” as adult supervision!)

Soon there are wet youngin’s splashin’ and cryin’ everywhere.

That face you make when you realize that your formerly immature ex– who once wanted to be a rap superstar– is now more mature than you are…

Over in Delaware, Jo comes over to Kail’s place to talk about the verbal brawl that went down between her and Javi in front of Isaac. Jo tells Kail that Isaac was really upset about Kail and Javi’s fight, and Kail apologizes for having Isaac around all the havoc. Jo is being totally mature about the situation, and doesn’t even yell at Kail for her actions.

“We’re all adults,” he says. “We should all be acting like adults.”

“And I’m not even going to mention the fact that you’re wearing sweats right now….”

You have to give it to Jo. He could have acted like a real dick here, but didn’t.

Jo tells Kail that Isaac was kind of traumatized by the fighting, and Kail feels really bad about upsetting the kids.

Meanwhile in South Dakota, it’s Aubree’s first day of first grade. Chelsea gets Aubree up and ready for school, pins a giant bow on her head, and shuttles her off to school.

Ho-hum.

Finally, we check in with Jenelle and her Lurch-esque soulmate David. They’re heading off to get a sonogram of their baby (but, of course, at this point Jenelle is “totally not pregnant” or anything). They still haven’t told anybody that Jenelle is knocked up, despite the fact that you can basically see The Spawn of Lurch jutting out from her midsection.

“When she’s older we can share hair feathers, Ke$ha CDs and defense attorneys!”

Jenelle, of course, is hoping for a girl this time around, since she’s already squeezed two boys from the waterslide ‘o’ illegitimate children that is her loins. Jenelle said that she’s been looking at both girls’ and boys’ names, just in case. (I still vote for Lurch Jr. or Lurchette, personally, but that’s just me!)

They head into the doctor’s office, and an hour later come out and announce to the producers that they are having a Lurchette! That’s right: Jenelle will finally have the little girl she’s always dreamed of. Just think of all the fun that mother and daughter will have as the years go by: Wearing matching court-required ankle bracelets, carpooling to the local jail to see their respective beaus; oh, the fun will never stop!

Since Jenelle is finally having a girl, she tells the producer that she no longer needs to continue to shoot out babies. She declares that Lurchette will be her final child.

Somewhere at a North Carolina Walmart, I think I heard Barbara snort in disbelief.

“Gather ’round all y’all kids and slurp up this here soup! Heatin’ it takes all the nutritious-ness outta it!”

In West Virginia, Leah’s fixin’ a nutritious meal for the kids. She divvies up a can of soup swill among the youngins, legit just dumping it straight into a bowl. The kids slop it down happily. (Hey, even cold canned soup starts to taste good after a week full of Lunchables and gas station hot dogs!) Who needs that ding-dang microwave anyway! It probably just adds more dye to the babies’ heads!

The kids are excited for their upcoming trip, and Leah is busy packing. Victoria, ever lurking ’round Leah’s new living quarters, is there to discuss how Leah’s ex-husbands are reacting to the news of the California trip. (She also spends a good amount of this time picking some sort of crust out of her eye, so there’s that…)

That moment Victoria realizes she’s not getting a free trip to California…

Victoria asks Leah “who all” is going to Ca-li-for-nia with her and the kids. She looks disappointed when Leah doesn’t ask her to tag along, but there’s already plenty of moochers going on the trip. Leah’s mom Dawn will be going, as will Maddy, who is the baby-mama of Leah’s brother Isaac.

“It’s gonna be so much fun! I’m so excited!” Leah squeals to her sister, who, again, is not invited.

“I hear they have streets made of gold and rivers of Mountain Dew out there in California!”

Victoria barely manages to slur out the producer-required question about Ali’s wheelchair. Leah says she’s going to take the chair, but she’s fixin’ to put it “under the plane.” So…is she just gonna duct tape it to the belly of the plane or…?

Leah says she’s doing her best to not make Ali feel different than her sisters.

Meanwhile, Kail’s lawyer is getting some divorce paperwork together for Javi to look at. Javi is ready to get the divorce moving, and get the custody situation for Lincoln planned out. Javi will have to wait a few more months before he’s legally unbound from Kail, and in the meantime, he says he’s scared that he’s going to turn a corner and see Kail humping some dude on a park bench…or something.

“She better not touch my sneaker collection, or things are gonna get nasty!”

Javi says that he feels bad for Isaac, and his friend insists that Kail’s going to come crawling back to Javi and beg him to hump her on a park bench…or something.

Um…no, bro. Even Stevie Wonder can see that’s never gonna happen.

In North Carolina, David asks Jenelle if she was being serious when she said she wasn’t planning to have more babies. (I mean, between them, this will be their fifth illegitimate child and, clearly, that’s not enough! This is ‘Teen Mom’ after all!)

Speaking of those “other” illegitimate children, Jenelle and Lurch discuss how they plan to tell their assorted offspring that they’re adding to the litter. Jenelle is sure that Jace will be thrilled to hear that she’s having another baby.

Jenelle is looking forward to doing a photo shoot reveal to announce pregnancy. Obviously the police report pregnancy reveal wasn’t “more classy” enough for Jenelle, so she’s hoping to break the Internet by announcing via Instagram photo that a Lil’ Lurchette is on its way.

“I like blankets. Blankets are cool.”

Lurch is insisting that they name their daughter Pearl, but Jenelle already has a few names in mind. She wants something that’s not too weird, and is adamant that her baby not be named Pearl or, randomly, Blanket.

How about Felony? It has a nice ring to it, no?

Jenelle gets on the Interwebs and starts to pretend that she’s looking up names. They magically come across “Ensley” which means “my own meadow”…or something. Lurch’s eyes light up when he hears it.

“I like how it looks when it’s spelled,” he exclaims in between grunts. (Hopefully Ensley can one day teach her father how to actually spell her name. Maybe she can make flashcards or something?)

The face we all made when we heard that Jenelle plans to change Jace’s last name to Eason…

Jenelle and Lurch seem to have settled on a first name, and Jenelle tells the producer that Baby Ensley will be given the gift of Lurch’s last name. In fact, Jenelle plans to give all of her kids the Eason last name– even her long-lost first son, Jace! She declares that when she “gets Jace back” she will be changing his last name to Eason as well.

The look on Producer Kristen’s face when Jenelle says this is damn near priceless. She just stares at Jenelle with this look, almost like she can’t believe that Jenelle is STILL singing the “When I Get Jace Back” tune, all these years later. And now she’s added on a “Gonna Change His Name” chorus.

Oh, Juh-nelle! Ya never cease to amaze us!

“I ain’t so good with the spelling and such…”

Lurch is still in awe of the name they’ve come up with for their baby.

“Ensley Eason,” he coos. “I can see it on a billboard now…”

So can I! And you know, those strip club billboards are getting fancier and fancier all the time! He’ll be so proud!

Over in the holler, Leah is waking up the kids to take them to Cal-i-fornia. She piles them into the car and zooms off, dreaming of palm trees and sunshine and…cities where most of the people have most of their teeth. She drags her herd through the airport, where they meet up with Mama Dawn, who has been noticeably missing from recent episodes.

“This sure do beat that 22-hour flight to Hawaii we was fixin’ to take!”

Leah and the babies board the plane and are soon flying through the skies toward Southern California. Once they arrive in California, Leah decides to take the girls to the beach for a yoga lesson…as you do.

Leah and the girls spread out on the sand for their private yoga lesson. The teacher shows them how to twist their bodies into animal poses and moo like a cow.

The next day, Leah takes the youngins to a waterpark. Everyone’s having a splish-splashin’ good time. Later that day, Leah and Maddy head out to get some BBQ without the kids, who are surely exhausted from their under-the-sea excursions.

“Nomnomnom! And I thought cold soup was good! This is fine eatin’ right here!”

Leah talks about how great the vacation has been (all while slopping down giant helpings of some sort of barbecue meat product). The food is finger-lickin’ good and Leah is happily shoveling in food (all while smacking her lips…as you do). She talks about how great Ali is handling her wheelchair these days, but adds that she still encourages her to walk. She is scared that Ali’s mobility will eventually start to decline rapidly as she gets older.

When your client tells you she wants to undo all the work you’ve done on her wedding…but she’s a celebrity so you can’t say anything…

Back in South Dakota, Chelsea meets up with her oddly-named wedding planner, Loghin, to discuss how the baby lodged in Chelsea’s uterus may upset Chelsea’s existing wedding plans. Chelsea tells Loghin that she and Cole have decided to move the wedding to the following year.

Loghin doesn’t really even try to hide her exasperation. (This poor girl not only has to live with that horrible name, but now just wasted a whole bunch of time and energy planning a wedding that is getting knocked aside because her client got knocked up!)

“It could be worse: I could be marrying Adam!”

Chelsea says she wants to have a small “shotgun” ceremony in Nebraska on the originally planned date, and then a big party and reception the following year. Loghin says that she’ll have the call up the venue, caterer and florist (not to mention whichever straight-from-county-jail chola stencils on Chelsea’s eyebrows) and see if they are still available to do the wedding a year later.

Chelsea says that having a baby this time around is so much better because 1) she now has MTV money to support it and 2) she’s having the baby with Cole and not Adam, the Sultan of Syphilis.

Later, Chelsea takes Aubree to her softball game. (For some reason, Chelsea chose to wear a tank top that says BRIDE in big letters. It’s almost as weird as Victoria’s “Drug Free” T-shirt from earlier in the episode.)

“See? This is the disrespect I was talking about. They could’ve at least hung up a ‘Welcome Adam’ banner or something!”

Adam and whatever poor sap he’s dating at the moment arrive at the game too. Adam and Chelsea totally avoid each other at the game. Chelsea tells her dad Randy that Adam chose to show up at the two games of the season that MTV was filming at. (I’m sure that was a total coincidence though.) Chelsea says that Adam hasn’t been at any of Aubree’s other games, and that he failed to make an appearance at Aubree’s first day of school.

Of course, Adam had good reasons for missing the events. I mean, those vacations aren’t going to take themselves, you know!

Chelsea also notes that Adam doesn’t call Aubree when she’s at Chelsea’s house, and that there have been several of Adam’s weekends where The Big A failed to even make an appearance at his parents’ house to see Aubree.

“I feel somethin’ bitin’ my toe!”
“Just keep smiling, David.”

Meanwhile, Jenelle and Lurch have waded knee-deep in the local swamp waters in order to create the perfect photo to announce Baby Lurchette’s arrival. Once they’ve shucked off the leeches from their legs, they run on over to the nearest computer in order to post the photos on social media. Jenelle purposely posts the photos on social media before she bothers to tell her own mother, Babs, and her son Jace about the new baby.

We watch as Jenelle posts the photo to her Instagram account. She and Lurch try to decide how to caption the announcement photo. (“Words and stuff is hard.”)

They finally decide what to write, and Jenelle explains the importance of her announcing the pregnancy herself (even though The Ashley had already confirmed it…as did a police report.)

David looks like a deranged Clark Kent in this picture…

“That’s like the trashiest way to announce anything,” Jenelle declares.

Well…yeah…basically. But we are talking about Jenelle here…

The next day, Jenelle, Lurch and their assorted youngins meet up with Babs and Jace for lunch. Babs seems to know what “news” Jenelle and Lurch have for her, so she’s come prepared by ordering a giant glass of wine for herself.

“It’s good for ya haaaaaaart!”

“No way am I gonna have this con-vasation without a glass of wine!”

Finally, Jenelle and Lurch tell the kids that they have a “big surprise” for them. Jace seems to already know what’s coming, so he stays silent. Lurch asks his daughter what she thinks the photo showing David holding Jenelle’s stomach could mean.

“That you’re getting married?” she suggests.

PSHHHH! Girl, this is ‘Teen Mom!’ That just doesn’t happen on this show. At least, not until a couple of babies are shot out.

Jenelle finally reveals that she is having a baby. It’s basically the most anti-climatic moment ever.

“Knocked up again, eh, Ma?”

Jace doesn’t say anything for a minute. He seems to be trying to process the information (and/or trying to come up with the best burn to throw at his ever-fertile mother).

“Another one?” he asks Jenelle.

JACE FOR THE WIN!

Jenelle asks Jace if he’s excited and he just stays silent. Finally, he admits that he’s not excited for Jenelle to add another kid to her rag-tag circus, particularly one that’s a girl.

Barb does not hold her feelings back either. She tells Jenelle that it was “real nice” for her to have to read about her next graaaaandkid on the Internet.

“I did the pictures yesterday at night!” Jenelle says. “Did you want me to call you at 7 o’clock at night?!”

“Why do I have a feelin’ that this kid is gonna end up livin’ in my house. Better buy anotha set of bunk beds!”

Barb just stares at her and says yes. It’s not like Babs is in bed at 7 p.m. or something. She’s probably only a quarter of the way through her first box of wine at that time! She surely could have taken a phone call.

Poor Babs says that she had to find out from her co-workers at Waaaaaalmart that her own bitch of a daughta was knocked up.

“Everyone at Waaaalmart knew!” Babs says. “I was very upset and was crying. I had to go out to may caaaahr!”

Lurch pipes in to say that they didn’t really tell anyone about the baby anyway. Well, except for everyone on social media, that is.

Derderduuhhhhh….

Babs has had ENOUGH of these two yokels. She slings a fireball of a comment back at Jenelle.

“If I tied my tubes, what would I use to reel in soulmates? Duh, Mom!”

“So after this one are ya gonna get ya tubes tied!?” she asks.

Barb and Jace must have rehearsed this or something. Their remarks in this scene are Grade A Snark!

Jenelle gets very annoyed by the comment and tells her mom that she doesn’t know. We all know that there will be plenty more kids sliding out of Jenelle’s loins in the future. It’s just a given.

“Ya gonna have MORE kids?!” Babs asks incredulously.

Jesus God (Jenelle)!

When you know you deserve to get yelled at, but you can’t stop wondering if your mint ‘n’ chip is melting inside the store…

Meanwhile in Delaware, Javi and Lincoln meet up with Jo, Vee and Isaac at an ice cream shop. They all get some frozen treats and Isaac is obviously relishing his time with Javi. Jo pulls Javi outside and wants to talk about Javi and Kail’s big brawl. Jo tells Javi that he’s not happy about his son being around a fight fit for the “Jerry Springer Show” and that it can’t happen again.

Javi apologizes for what went down, and Jo reminds Javi that he, too, has been on the wrong side of Kail a time or two. He also tells Javi that all of the problems that used to be between them are now “squashed” and that he’s happy that Javi is home.

“I’ve been in your Yeezys. man…I feel ya!”

We’ve got to give another kudos to Jo. He handled the entire situation like a grown-up, even when everyone around him didn’t. He’s become a real man and The Ashley is happy to see it. (She is, of course, slightly sad that she’ll probably never get to make fun of Jo’s rap career again, though.)

Finally, we check back in one last time with Jenelle. She and her crew have finished their lunch, so she takes Jace aside to talk to him alone. She wants to know why Jace didn’t jump for joy when she announced that she’s having yet another spawn. Jenelle assumes Jace isn’t excited because the baby is a girl.

“You wish it was a boy, huh?” she asks.

“You really are clueless, aren’t you Jenelle?”

Jace just looks at her and says “No.”

It’s so obvious that the baby’s sex has nothing to do with it. Jace wishes there was NO baby and probably wishes his mother would stop having babies with a “soulmate” each year, and focus on him for a change.

“That’s not right,” Jace tells her before stopping himself.

This kid is like seven and seems to have more sense than Jenelle and Lurch! I mean, that’s not saying much, but still…

Finally, Jace tells Jenelle that he’s happy to have a sister, just to get her to stop asking him over and over. She asks Jace if he wants to come live with her and her “big, big family” and he says yes, but isn’t even able to look at Jenelle while he says it.

When your mom can’t stop popping out kids…but that’s none of your business…

Jenelle reminds Jace that, no matter how many kids she hurls from her baby cannon, he will always be the very first baby she ever shot out.

Until next week, kids!

To read The Ashley’s previous ‘Teen Mom 2’ recaps, click here!

(Photos: MTV)

 

 

 

39 Responses


  1. Changing Jace’s name when he is this old? Absolutely ridiculous! No. Just no. You’ve been with this dude for what, a year? Make it heck-to-the-NO.


  2. This show has gone on for such a long time that at the moment I am just wating for the kids start having kids. I have my fingers crossed for Aleeah (or maybe Jace) to be the first one. Wouldn’t that make a show?


  3. When he said that Ensley is a name that he could see on a billboard, the statement “Yeah when she’s headlining at JUGGS” came flying out of my mouth. Not only because of that name, but because those are probably the only billboards David pays attention to because the the other billboards are just full of those confusing letters jammed together making no sense, but the JUGGS ones are full of boobies and that’s clearly the language he speaks.

    I applaud Jo – he’s being the adult and it probably isn’t even for the cameras. He’s looking out for Issac and even though he thinks that Kail and Javi are a few nuggets short of a happy meal, he’s not letting that stand in the way of what his son wants and needs. Maybe Vee is the good influence on him.

    Did anyone watch the after show with Leah and Kail? Apparently Leah is going to school now. Because, you know, she enjoys “learnin'” (hey, that’s what she said) and she doesn’t know what she’s studying yet, but she’s thinking Communications. Yeah…


  4. -Jace’s reaction was PRICELESS, and he was totally right. It’s very telling when your 7 year old sees that it’s a HORRIBLE idea for you to have another baby….and I’m 1000% sure that Kaiser is about to basically be thrown to the side. Lurch already called him a “bitch” last season…only God knows what obscenities he calls him when the camera’s are off. Kaiser is the one that’s going to suffer the most. His mother and his father are complete idiots, his step-dad is also a psycho that shouldn’t be anywhere near a child, and his brother is safe living with his grandmother, meanwhile Kaiser has to go back to a home where I’m sure Jenelle isn’t “nourishing” him.

    -When are they just going to be done with Adam? I’m sick of seeing him and that landing strip in the middle of his head on my TV. He’s got such a terrible attitude, and MTV needs to stop chasing him because he’s not worth it…only good things happen when people stop chasing Adumb Lind…just look at Chelsea.


  5. I have seriously come to adore Jo and Vee. Sure, Jo has some questionable moments, but as a whole……I’m impressed with his maturity and compassion this season. It can’t be easy to be at dinner with your son, who start crying because he misses his other dad, but to then turn around and encourage and facilitate Isaac and Javi spending time together. That’s a hell of a lot more than Kailyn is doing right now.

    I loved the way Jo handled his discussions with both Kailyn and Javi. It does make me wonder if all the Jo/Javi beef from earlier episodes and seasons was MTV editing bull shit like Cory and Jeremy’s supposed hatred for each other. Also, I think Vee (and Miranda) are the unsung heroes of TM2. It can’t be easy to be a step-parent, let alone on tv, while trying to co-parents with the bat shit crazy that is Kailyn and Leah. Neither Vee or Miranda is perfect, but it seems clear to me they each love their step kids.

    Also, trying not to judge, but it does seem like Victoria is on something. She seems more strung out than in past seasons. I actually felt sorry for her not being invited on the trip to California. It seemed like she wanted to be included and was hurt/surprised to find out on camera she was staying home.


    1. I’ve been slack-jawed watching Jo the entire season.
      The conversation with Vee where he was genuinely concerned about how visitation would look when Lincoln/Javi visits would start because he recognized and respected the Javi/Isaac bond and didn’t want that to end (unless Javi felt otherwise)and thought out loud about how Isaac might feel if his relationship with Javi were to suddenly look much different from his brother’s had me sitting there like “When did this happen? He is legit thinking things through better than ‘Dr.’ Drew.”


  6. All your captions made me crack up, as usual, especially the Jace ones. I busted out laughing at each one. But honestly, my heart hurts so much for that kid. Jenelle is such a selfish, unfit mother and its unfortunate poor Jace (and the other two) are stuck with her as a mom. You can just see the sadness on Jace’s face all the time 🙁


  7. I have to say that barbeque Leah was eating looked good. Although I am pregnant so that may have something to do with it but I just really want some barbeque now!! Jenelle is ridiculous. Be happy I’m popping out another illegitimate child Jace. I’ll get you back and we’ll live happily ever after. Jace doesn’t want to live with her. Barbara is his mother, always has been. It would be like taking Carly from Brandon and Theresea and giving her to Caitlyn & Tyler. Also she should really stop saying get him back since she never had him. She was never his mother. Chelsea should stop with the big wedding next year. You got married. Move on. If she really wanted the big wedding she should have went ahead and had it. Leah, eh, she seems sober and more stable. She’s too skinny though. Kailyn is awful! She was done with Javi long ago and doesn’t seem to be trying to get along with him at all. Awful situation for the kids. Also, can’t wait til Jenelle has to get a job. The inevitable broken engagement, police response, crying and court case is coming soon.


  8. Leah- stop it
    Chelsea-we get it your life is cute and adam is a douche
    Kailyn- think about your kids ffs she brought in javi as the new daddy then booted him to the curb and expects her kids to do the same. Go jo at least someone has issacs best interests in mind
    Jenelle….poor jace hes been fed this line of im gonna get you back for 6 years meanwhile she keeps having babies and hes left behind. No wonder he has anger issues and behavioral problems. Its completely sad seeing his reactions then having jenelle try and get him to praise her for getting knocked up….again….disturbing and extremely sad she needs constant reassurance from every male in her life that she has worth even her own 6 yr old son. Poor poor jace


  9. Chelsea dissapointed me honestly. All of that talk she will have a baby AFTER the wedding but still go through with it and then she has only a smaller wedding and the big one next year. Why? You are already DeBoer? What are you going to celebrate now? You are already married! (She is also not religious so that makes even less sense then)

    Jenelle and David had no regard to Jace when they made Ensley. It just shows she doesn’t care about him at all. I hope Barbara stay on this world for a long time, God knows this kid needs her more than anything!

    Kail/Javi: meh, some stupid divorce drama and Jo is my fave now.

    Leah is doing well.


    1. What are you saying about Chelsea exactly? I agree having a big wedding a year after her marriage is ridiculous. I don’t understand what you’re saying about the baby part though. And I thought she was religious to some degree anyway since her and Randy said abortion was not an option in their family (on 16 & pregnant). Not that religion is the only reason people don’t believe in abortion.


  10. I am really loving Jo this time around. The fact that he is willing to give up some of his time with Isaac for Javi is great. He seems to be the only one who has concern for how this affects Isaac. Kail seems like she could care less.

    Also does Victoria seem like she’s strung out. She looks like she can’t focus lol


  11. Jace’s sad face just breaks my heart. He will likely grow up and have lots of anger issues but I see his sad little face and just want to erase his past for him and give him a fresh start 🙁 … Totally random, but I cant stand seeing Chelsea’s big moose Kailyn look alike friend “Chelsea” aka Belinda. She needs to get a life of her own and stop following Chelsea everywhere. She is like a single white female stalker.


  12. First of all, when I saw Lurchette and Adam, the sultan of syphilis I literally had to put my phone down because I was laughing so hard! God I love these recaps!! I was really impressed with how Jo handled everything with Kail and Javi. He has come a long way and I’m glad he’s trying to do the right thing for Isaac. It was nice to see. My heart just broke when I watched Jace during that whole scene. He will forever be the forgotten child and the fact that Jenelle just doesn’t see that is so sad. She keeps having these other babies while Jace was raised by someone else and has very little time with his mother. Then on top of it all she wants to take him away from the only life he knows (although I doubt it will happen any time soon). Jenelle is delusional thinking that everyone will be so excited for her. Girl how about taking care of your first baby and try and have a stable relationship that lasts longer than 9 months. Poor Jace.


    1. I swear Jenelle is having all these kids to make Jace jealous. It’s almost like she’s trying to make him for once say that he wants to live with her and actually mean it. Kinda like see, your brother and sister live with me…now you should want to too. I don’t think Jace has once said “I don’t want to live with MehMeh anymore”. He’s always like I don’t want to leave MehMeh because she’ll be sad, or that he likes it at his grandma’s. It’s always Jenelle forcing him to say I want to live with you. Jace seems caught in the middle, but I do think he wants to stay with his grandmother. Jenelle is just so irresponsible, selfish and has kids for all of the wrong reasons. It’s really unfortunate that someone so delusional can make babies.


  13. This has been bothering me for a while, and I’m glad The Ashley pointed it out.

    Why do “adults” on this show continue to ask children questions they have no control over/no interest in?

    They ALL do it! “Are you excited you’re getting a little brother/sister?” “Are you happy Mommy is getting married?” “What do you think about Mommy not living with _________ anymore?” Maybe ask your kid about, I don’t know, what happened in THEIR day today. What they had for lunch. Who fought them for the Legos in school today. I don’t know, SOMETHING that interests them.

    In all seriousness, how many non-biological men are these girls going to expose their children to? And part of the problem is that many of them are good guys. They’re bringing their children into these “families,” and then dissolving them six months later. How many “special rooms” can be set aside for these kids, and how many different men will require visitation rights, legal or otherwise? I fear for these children.

    And while I applaud Jo this season for being the most mature “character” in Kailyn’s story, I find his 5:00 ice cream rendezvous quite dubious for someone who has children and might possibly be concerned about spoiling their dinner. But that’s just me!


    1. I think it’s awfull and (borderline) abusive how much these people burden their kids with with all the forced questions, the manipulation, bashing their other parent/ caregiver and the fighting.
      I know fights and drama happens in many family and custody cases but the ‘reality filming’ ads to it.
      These kids don’t know when things are instructed, rehashed or actually fake, yet they witness it.
      I really don’t get why these kids are not protected by anyone.


      1. I agree. Jenelle’s need to mask her obvious feelings of low self esteem causes her to want the people around her (namely Jace) to agree with all her poor decisions. When she doesn’t hear what she wants from her son and selfishly persists with her questions, Jace (being MUCH more intelligent get than his mother) just tells her what she wants to hear. It’s so heart-breakingly obvious that Jace just wants out of there. You can see that he doesn’t even look at her when they talk (a bad sign) and when she hugged him in that episode, he physically shrank away. Contrast that to his interactions with his grandmother and you see he looks at her, engages with her when they talk, and he puts his arms around her when they hug.

        Jenelle you just don’t get it. More kids won’t make you feel good about yourself. Making better decisions that require hard work and sacrifice is the only way to make this happen. Drop the mooching guys, focus on the kids you have, and invest your time in improving yourself through education.


      2. The family court system doesn’t protect children at all. The only thing that surprised me about the degree of manipulation/PAS/constant questioning was the fact they ALL do it. Every single woman on this dang show. Chelsea did it for years in front of Aubree (constant questioning and sh!t talking about Adam in front of her), Jenelle directly involving Jace in her court battles with Babs. Leah putting the kids in the middle, and Kail using hers as pawns.

        This is the stuff that destroys childhoods. And why I can’t watch the freaking show.


      3. The leading questions they ask the kids really bug me too. I have been heartbroken for Isaac these past few episodes and never knew divorce could be so horrible on a child – honestly I never understood. My parents divorced when I was 5 and I never witnessed a single fight or disagreement – this show is making me understand the horrible effects since their kids are SO involved and they don’t seem to understand how to have adult conversations while the kids aren’t around. 🙁
        When Leah tells Addy that “it’s going to be hard, you’re going to miss your Dad” about Jeremy going off to work like.. STOP. WHY. She makes things way worse for her kids instead of being like “Daddy has a good job so he has to travel but he’ll be back before you know it!”
        AGH.


    2. Really? It really concerned you that Jo got ice cream with his kids at 5:00?

      Those are the type of completely petty judgments that you should just keep to yourself, because it just doesn’t matter….at all. How do you know they didn’t have an early dinner at 4:00 that day? Or maybe they weren’t going to eat dinner until around 6:30? Or maybe they just decided that on that particular day, everyone was getting ice cream for dinner. You have no idea, but yet you just felt the need to make the comment. And that is why I stay away from all the moms I know that are just like you.


  14. Jesus God, the Ashley, that last caption made my day. 🙂

    When Jace and Jo are the voices of reason, it may be time to close this chapter of Teen Mom. I feel like MTV should have a show called TM TNG, focusing on the kids. Just drop all the kids off on a playdate and watch the cuteness and drama unfold. They can give us the real scoop on what’s going on behind closed doors. If MTV wants to throw a few therapists in the room to help with their issues off-camera, that’d be okay too. (Not Dr. Drew, professional ones.)

    Side note: Does anyone know what careers Jo and Vee currently have?


  15. So, Jenelle and Lurch want to become one big “Eason Family”? I just pray that Nathan and Barbara are going to fight Jenelle on that, because Lurch aka Uncle Bad Touch adopting Kaiser and Jace? Hell no! Either way, it’s going to be one epic white trash custody battle and in the midst of it will be Jenelle with her “I am an awesome mother” instagram pics!


    1. Well, they just announced yesterday on instagram that they, I quote : “have decided on forever”. With a picture where he kiss her forehead and she’s showing the ring.
      Poor Jace, Kaiser and the little one when it’s gonna to end


  16. Jace wins Best comment!!!”Another One” ??? Kail attitude is so disgusting this season. Lurchette tho ?? You have the best recaps ashley! And Victoria you’re on TV!! At least Comb your hair One time!


    1. Taking the kids to the crappiest, unsafe, gang infested beach in Long Beach (yes, I live here) doesn’t scream mother of the year either.


    1. seriously….and you already know he’s going to be treated like the red headed step child. It’s clear as day David doesn’t like him, and he’s gonna show Ensley more love and attention. That whole situation is unfortunate, and Jenelle seriously doesn’t see anything wrong with it. She’s so delusional.


  17. Seems like Jo and Javi coparent better than Jo and Kail and Javinand Kail. I used to like Kail the best on this show but now I think money along with a rough childhood has skewed her judgement. Sadly it’s the kids who suffer.


    1. And Kail needs to stop with all the changes to her appearance lately. The tattoos…the plastic surgery to morph her body to look like I don’t know what…she just needs to stop. Find your inner beauty first Kail!


  18. I laughed when Jenelle didn’t know who Dr Quinn Medicine Woman was, but then Uncle Creepy didn’t know who Blanket is…
    But together these two still only have half a brain.

    Also Barb used “I cried” as ammunition–that’s Jenelle’s signature move!


  19. “Swimmin’ pools…movie stars…” HA Larios! I picture Dawn in Granny’s old rocking chair up in the back of the truck, can’t stop laughing! Your recaps are simply the BEST!

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