Stake your claim on some property in the woods and proceed to hideout until your angry, frizzy-haired husband calms the hell down… it’s time for another episode of Sister Wives!
When we last checked in with the
Frown Brown family, things were rockier than ever and no, we’re not referring to the terrain at Coyote Pass — the site where all good things (and struggling marriages) seemingly come to an end.
The positivity continues this week, as the episode kicks off at Robyn’s house, moments before she and Kody sit their kids down to tell them they’re being forced to move into yet another house. While Robyn is stressed about having to break the news to the kids, Kody says he plans to “dirty up the house” nice and good with his muddy shoes because it won’t be theirs to live in for much longer.
What a catch this guy is!
When Robyn and Kody’s kids arrive at home, they plop themselves onto the tootsie-roll-looking furniture and brace themselves for a family talk, which in this family almost always involves some sort of house presentation…or an announcement that yet another Kody spawn is about to shoot from Robyn’s baby garden.
The kids notice that Kody is lacking his ever-present posterboard, and realize that this is not just another presentation for his Polygamy Barbie Dreamhouse.
During this particular family meeting, Robyn and Kody tell the kids the people who own the house they’re currently renting want to sell it/get Kody and his muddy shoes off the premises ASAP. This means that soon, they’ll have to once again pack up their belongings and haul them to another home—preferably a rental, if they can find one.
The kids are understandably shocked, given that living in this rental was the closest thing they’ve had to stability since Kody made them leave the Cul-de-Sac of Broken Dreams in Vegas.
Robyn begins mourning her Las Vegas home (once again) while Kody reminds everyone that none of this is his fault.
“I didn’t ask for this,” he says.
He is conveniently forgetting that he did ask for this when he uprooted the entire family and moved them to Arizona, without selling their Vegas homes first or having any other sturdy plan as to where all of his wives and crotchgoblins would live in Arizona.
The news of another impending move causes Robyn and Kody’s daughter Aurora to get emotional, while their son Dayton says he’s irritated.
Naturally, Dad of the Year Kody decides to “lighten the moods” of his unhappy children by joking that they can all share bedrooms at the next rental.
Despite the “crap sandwich” that Kody says the family has been handed—- the very sandwich that Chef Kody crafted himself—- everyone surprisingly says they’re happy in Flagstaff.
Well, maybe not surprisingly… #StockholmSyndrome.
As a palate cleanser to Robyn and Kody’s bad news, the family meets up later for something a little more upbeat—Maddie and Caleb’s gender reveal party. However, because Maddie and Caleb are in North Carolina, the family is doing the reveal via video chat with the couple, as well as some of the other older kids.
The kids at the in-person party seem to be relieved when Maddie and Caleb pop up on the TV and not house plans.
Before the gender reveal goes down, Christine reveals that, like Janelle, she already knows what Maddie and Caleb are having. Janelle says she isn’t mad that someone other than her—“the bio mom”—knows the gender of the baby, she just would have preferred Christine to have told her that she knew about it earlier.
As for Kody, he’s still bummed that no one shares any family secrets with him… after all, he’s clearly the most trustworthy.
Following some chaotic hand-raising in the living room, the family does a countdown and shoots confetti cannons to reveal that Maddie and Caleb are having a baby girl.
After the reveal, Kody celebrates, not because he’s getting a granddaughter, but because he selected the right color ribbon upon his arrival to the party and “won” the bet. Of course, the only prize Kody is taking home in our eyes is for most obnoxious—the title of which he is the reigning undisputed champ.
And speaking of undisputed champs, while Robyn and Meri nearly came to blows last episode over Coyote Pass house plots, the two are now playing nice with each other. (Yes, kids, that probably means that we will probably not see any Sister Wives Jello Wrestling Matches…for now anyway…)
Of course, Meri already has enough tension within her life having to deal with Kody, so she doesn’t really want to add Robyn as another enemy.
In addition to finding some common ground, Meri and Robyn are also finding comfort in the fact that they’re both being kicked out of their respective rental homes.
However, unlike Robyn, Meri has already found herself another rental to move her and her leggings into while Robyn is left feeling the pressure from Kody to buy a house.
Unfortunately, Robyn may not have much of a choice in the matter for long, as we learn later on that the owners of her current rental have already sold the house, leaving the family just 60 days to pack up and peace out. (That gives Kody less than two months to stomp his feet and get mud all over the home’s carpets…)
Once more, Kody and Robyn sit the kids down on the tootsie-roll sofas to share the news that they’re moving, most likely putting in an offer on a house that they’ve yet to even find and that all of this will set inevitably them back on their eventual move to Coyote Pass.
Aurora tells her parents she was really looking forward to living on Coyote Pass before going off to college, but she’s started to realize it’s an unrealistic expectation. Kody glazes over his daughter’s comment and continues to tell the group why buying a house is a better option than renting.
“Mom and I are just in a fight about this,” Kody overshares to his kids, regardless of how obvious his statement may be.
In her confessional, Robyn admits that she and Kody have been arguing more than ever, while Kody resorts in his interview to threatening to divorce Robyn.
“I’m getting close to that point where I will dissolve the partnership that I have with her on agreement and I will go buy a house without her,” he says. “Those are threatening words, but I’d rather be a team and make it happen than to sit here and go to war in order to house my children.”
As Kody continues telling the kids how unrealistic rental options are, Aurora starts to get emotional and begins twitching. When Robyn notices what is happening, she goes over to the couch to sit with and comfort Aurora, who we learn is having a panic attack—something Robyn and Kody say Aurora deals with often and in high-stress situations.
Soon Aurora is unable to talk or walk and has to be carried out of the room by Kody. Upstairs, Robyn and Kody both comfort Aurora and try to calm her down. Robyn says she takes some blame for what Aurora is going through, while Kody (per usual) says they didn’t ask for any of this stress or any of the moving… Again, because he insists on overlooking that whole Las Vegas-to-Flagstaff uprooting he orchestrated.
Something that Kody and Robyn do agree on is the fact that Aurora’s panic attacks have gotten worse and Robyn notes that it’s likely because she’s feeling a disruption in the family. Robyn says she and Kody (aka not Kody at all) will continue looking for rentals, while Kody thinks he can use his kids as leverage in
guilting talking Robyn into buying a home.
Sounds like a solid plan, you two! Almost as solid as those house plans for Coyote Pass!
That’s all for this week!
On the next episode of ‘Sister Wives’, the wives take a trip to see Mariah and Audrey, Robyn shares her marital issues with the group (most likely to Janelle’s enjoyment) and Mariah talks to the family about coming out as part of the LGBTQ community, while Kody secretly wonders when he’ll get to talk about his favorite acronym: KODY.
To read The Ashley’s other ‘Sister Wives’ recaps, click here!