‘Teen Mom 2’ Season 10 Episode 11 Recap: A Mystery Man & Cancelled Travel Plans

“And by ‘doorknobs’ I mean ‘penises,’ obviously!”

Howdy, kids! It’s the week of Thanksgiving here in the good ol’ US of A so to get into the holiday spirit, let’s check in with our favorite Teen Mom 2 turkeys and see which of their baby daddies is crawling out from under Plymouth Rock this week!

We kick things off this episode in The WV, where Leah is worrying about the coronavirus and whatnot. She decides to tell her sister Victoria that she doesn’t think it’s a good idea for them to take Baby GreenCard down to Costa Rica to meet Roy-er. Victoria is not happy that her sister won’t be footing the bill for going on the trip.

“Somehow I knew this was gonna come about?” Victoria— who is apparently a psychic and can predict global pandemics— pouts. 

Leah explains that Ali has a compromised immune system, so this virus is particularly scary for her family. 

“And this one isn’t like the herpes. It don’t attack your cooter! It attacks your lungs!”

After hearing that, Victoria has to pretend that she agrees that they shouldn’t go, even though we all know that if Leah slapped her credit card down to pay for Victoria’s ticket, Victoria and the baby would be on that plane faster than you can say “I may come back pregnant again!” 

Victoria is sad for Roy-er, who is missing the first months of his son’s life. Leah promises she’ll arrange it so Victoria can take the baby down there. 

(Also, why the hell is it Leah’s job to see that her sister gets to Costa Rica?)

“And by ‘do your thing’ I obviously mean ‘bang him until you can’t bang no more!'”

Leah tells us later that this ding-dang coronavirus has “threw a wrench” in all her jetsetting plans. With the coronavirus becoming a bigger “dill” every day, Leah is worried about Ali getting sick. Because of this, she has banished the film crew from her house, and she’s going to film on her own. (Fingers crossed she’s using Mama Dawn‘s Handi-Cam from 1991 to do so.) 

Leah tells Producer Brandon (via video chat) that she’s afraid to leave her house and she doesn’t care if people think she’s being dramatic. Producer Brandon just looks at her like, ‘Um…people throw shoes at people on this show. This doesn’t even qualify as drama.’

Next, we swing up to Indiana, where Jade tells us Sean eventually agreed that Jade’s mom Christy could see Qloi. They proceed to have a monotone conversation of one- or two-word answers. (Seriously, how are they paying these knuckleheads so much money to do this on-camera?!) 

This picture basically sums up the excitement level of the entire scene…

Jade says that Christy is staying at an extended stay hotel currently, but as soon as they get stable things will change and Klowwy might be able to stay with Christy.

So….basically…things will never change.

Jade says that she also wants the kid to start seeing Sean’s family, who he is apparently estranged from currently.

Next we head to South Dakota. In an effort to add just a smidge of variety to her storyline, Chelsea is focusing on the new house she and Cole are going to start building instead of the usual A-D-A-M drama. On the way to their property, Chelsea and Cole tell Watson they’re going to pick out where they want their new house and he suggests they build the new cabin ‘o’ flannel print within close proximity to Chelsea’s favorite coffee joint. 

“We all know you love those pumpkin spice lattes, mom.”

After leaving the empty property, Chelsea talks about how busy her life is with the new house on the horizon and “her” clothing line with LaurieBelle’s. Chelsea drives this whole overworked business woman claim home by telling Cole that she is going on a work trip to LA with Laurie and “a few of the gals” from the store, during which Cole will be left to dole out Goldfish snacks all alone. As per usual, Cole pretends he’s fine with it. 

Cole’s inner baby-talking monologue is having a whole entire meltdown right now.

Chelsea says she used to freak out at the idea of leaving the kids behind for a weekend away but now she’s “silently celebrating” her upcoming trip. 

“Don’t worry, if I see any camouflage ‘I Heart LA’ tees, I’ll be sure to snag one for ya!”

Next we check in with Kail who has now told her boys that she’s expecting another baby. She didn’t, however, reveal that she’s having another boy because she wants to do a gender reveal with the kids to surprise them. Kail says Isaac is “team girl,” Lincoln is “team boy” and Lux is… a whole mood. 

Like father, like son…

Later on, Kail and Vee do a photoshoot together for Kail’s haircare line. After taking some photos, Kail tells Vee about the confetti-popper gender reveal going down that weekend and Vee confesses that Jo actually told her about Kail’s pregnancy before Kail had a chance to tell Vee herself. 

OK, now tell us what Jo really said!

Unfazed, Kail goes on to tell Vee that the kids didn’t have any questions for her when she sat them down to tell them the news, even after she practically begged them to ask a few. 

Is anyone else surprised that Lincoln didn’t fire back with, “do you?!”

Kail tells Vee she isn’t planning to put Chris on the baby’s birth certificate and if Chris wants to be on it, he’s going to have to fight her for it. 

Back in Indiana, Sean has decided to try to mend his relationships with his family. He asks Jade if it would be OK if his sister came to stay with them for a week.

WTF? Have these people never heard about meeting up with their family members at an Applebee’s or something, visiting for a few hours and being on their way? Why does everyone who shares DNA with them have to practically move in!?

Sean explains that he hasn’t seen his sister for years, because he didn’t talk to his family while he was on The Drugs. Now that he’s sober, he’s doing things right for once. 

“…as much…”

He says that while he was on The Drugs, he didn’t care about his grandparents, who are struggling with their health. 

Now, though, Sean wants to make it right for Klouwi because he “wants her to have as much loving people as she can.”

(Apparently the “schools aren’t well” in Indiana, either.) 

Later, Sean goes to pick up his sister Jen at the airport, and she bum-rushes him at first sight. (Sean is sure to capture the Kodak moment on film.) They tell us that they haven’t seen each other in seven years.

Sean tells Jen that he doesn’t want to end up like Jade’s parents, so he knew he needed to get his head on straight and put down The Drugs. 

Down in Florida, Briana is trying to figure out a specific amount each baby daddy will need to contribute, following her meeting with Luis and Devoin last episode. Here to help(ish)/score some free Lucky Charms cereal is Briana’s friend “Shirley.” 

This is a refreshing change… Most of the friends that pop up on this show are just thirsty.

As “Shirley” rummages through the refrigerator, Briana tells her she’ll be “so proud” of her for the recent Come to DeJesus moment she had with the baby daddies – both of whom, she adds, even took the time to read her list of demands. 

“That’s great, Bri! Can I have one of Nova’s Lunchables?”

After some more rambling – and more rooting around for food on “Shirley’s” part – Briana asks if $250 “per baby daddy” is too much. “Shirley” tells Briana she thinks it’s fair. After Briana fires off a lengthy text message to Luis and Devoin, she says if the two of them aren’t willing to cough up the funds, she’ll have to take them to court for child support. 

“I’d hate for Roxy ‘The High Heeler’ DeJesus to have to step in and handle things.”

Devoin and Luis text Briana back and both say they’re on board with what she’s proposing. With things seemingly in a good place, Briana decides to rock the baby daddy boat a bit by tweeting about the new guy she’s dating.

For the sake of the second-hand embarrassment I’m experiencing, I really wish you would have.

Later on, when asked about Briana’s tweets by a producer, “Shirley” tries to remove herself from the drama her best friend is actively stirring up. Briana tries to downplay her new relationship, telling “Shirley” that her new man is “not going to be involved in my personal life with my kids.”

Umm… is your new man Luis?

Over in South Dakota, Chelsea takes off to LA for her “business trip” with Laurie, whom Chelsea assures is “keeping us healthy” as C0VID concerns begin to grow.

“I’ve got wet wipes! That virus is no match for those!” 

First up on the LaurieBelle’s field trip is a meeting with some denim designers, where Chelsea – who is pretending to be an Iron Maiden fan today – tries on nearly identical distressed denim cut-offs and marvels over her outfit, which she declares is a “nice relaxed moment.”

Later on, Chelsea calls Cole to check in on the little ones and talk about the “exclusive” jeans she’s bringing to LaurieBelle’s. 

If there was ever a time to cool it with the baby voices, this conversation was it.

As Chelsea arrives back in South Dakota, she’s greeted by Cole and her litter. On the way home from the airport, Aubree asks Chelsea if she “got the coronavirus” while she was away, to which Chelsea says “I hope not.” Aubree then schools her parents on where the virus started and how people have begun wearing masks on airplanes. 

OK, maybe the cellphone wasn’t such a bad idea after all? 

Back in Delaware, it’s the day of Kail’s gender reveal. Kail invites a few of her friends to the house as well as a photographer. Before the festivities begin, Kail talks to Isaac and Lincoln about their little brother or sister, almost as if she’s trying to convince Lincoln to get on board with “team girl” despite knowing she’s definitely having another boy. While Kail is trying to explain to Lincoln that girls can wrestle, Lux hangs out in another room, preparing for the gender reveal in his own way. 

Not pictured: the “wake me up when you guys are done” sign taped to Lux’s back.

Once the photographer has everything set up, Kail hands the boys their poppers and they go on to reveal a room full of blue confetti, much to Isaac’s disappointment. Later, Kail consoles Isaac by asking him, “Are you pissed?” She reminds him that he already has a little sister at his dad’s house and tells him she could always try for a little sister in the future.

“Can we leave Chris out of the next one, though?”

In Florida, after (almost) getting called out by “Shirley,” Briana states the obvious reminds viewers that she “hasn’t always had the best luck with dating.” Though she claims she was trying to keep her new relationship “light,” Briana says her new man invited her to go with him to Puerto Rico. 

This feels like the perfect time to throw a “ItsYourSexLife.com” graphic up on the screen.

While she’s agreed to go on vacation with her new man, Briana says (for the fourth time) that she knows the two of them “will never be in a serious relationship.”

(Girl, are you trying to convince viewers or yourself?) 

Roxanne has agreed to watch Stella and Nova while Briana is banging her brains out in Puerto Rico, but Briana admits that her mom doesn’t really know the details of her trip – presumably who she’s going with. It doesn’t take long, however, for Roxanne to start putting the pieces together and let’s just say, she’s not pleased. 

“And you didn’t think once to invite me and ya sista?!”

Roxanne begins asking Briana questions about her mystery man, but Briana doesn’t budge and instead tells her mom it’s none of her business. Roxanne argues that for safety reasons, she needs to know who her daughter is hanging around, especially if she “shows up missing.”

Briana tells Roxanne if she were going to “go missing” she would’ve done so a long time ago, probably when they were still living five-deep in that overcrowded apartment with clutter as far as the eye can see. 

“I’m not emotionally prepared to have someone start sleeping on the couch again.”

After realizing this episode conversation is going nowhere, Roxanne leaves Briana with some advice: 1. “Don’t trust no mother f**ker.” 2. “Don’t touch doorknobs.” 3. Get yourself some hand sanitizer and condoms. 4. Don’t get stranded in Puerto Rico. 

I think that’s nice….

Nice try Briana, but you’re not getting your own spinoff.

On the day of her trip, Briana suckers “Shirley” into giving her a ride to the airport. A couple of days after she arrives, Briana is enjoying her trip, but says things are moving too fast and she’s not sure how she feels about it.

Still working to earn that bowl of cereal Briana gave her, “Shirley” is subjected to a FaceTime call, during which Briana basically talks in circles about how her new man wants to get serious with her and though she’s into him, she doesn’t want to take it to the next level. “Shirley” looks bored to death.

“No bowl of cereal is worth all of this… “

Down in West Virginia, things have gotten weird real darn fast. The girlseses have makeup all over their faces and their hair is all frazzled and they’re shooting a “movie” at their house. 

So…they basically dressed up like Leah back in her “canned ravioli” days?

It’s not all lipstick-covered faces at Leah’s, though. The girlseses are starting to get sad that they can’t see their dads, due to the coronavirus. She allows Addie to go see Jeremy’s mom, and then uses the time to talk to the twinseses about why they have to stay home. She keeps pointing at Ali and reminding them that Ali has a compromised immune system so they can’t go anywhere. 

Leah then calls out poor Ali again, telling Aleeah that Ali was crying because she missed her dad. Aleeah calls Ali dramatic and the twinseses begin to squabble. 

Well, if that’s the case, she’s certainly on the right show…

That’s all for this episode! To read The Ashley’s recap of the previous episode of ‘Teen Mom 2,’ click here

(Photos: MTV) 

 

28 Comments

  1. So Kail is using Baby4’s birth certificate as a way of getting attention from Chris. To quote The Ashley “I think that’s nice…”


  2. I love your Khloi whatever lines. And how Cole and Chelsea really are. Big boring fakers for a storyline to get NTV cash. Without A D A M they would inly have that dunb ass schooldance once a year


  3. So with Bri, is Puerto Rico guy also Tattoo guy? And what’s with the secrets – it will never work, can’t possibly last yada yada yada. I just don’t see a married man, or one with a job, wanting to get involved with her mess.


  4. As usual, I about died while reading this. Klowy, Clowee, whatever. So many guesses.

    Kail, Chelsea & Bri need their legs glued shut. Esp Kail. At least Chelsea’s married. Kail is beyond a joke.

    As always, love Ali Girl. Compared to the rest of the kids. I feel kids are off-limits, but they’re so cruel to Ali.

    Anyways, there’s my essay… lol


    1. Why does Chelsea need to “keep her legs glued up” exactly?
      God forbid a married, financially stable woman wants another child


    2. Who the hell are you to tell someone to keep their legs closed? Happily married women open them all the time…and not every session ends in pregnancy. Slut shaming a married woman for enjoying sex with her husband? That’s low…and I feel so very sorry for whoever your ass is with. Karen – party of you!


  5. Barf. Please Kail, DO NOT try for another (eyeroll). It’s become so normal, run of the mill for her kids. It’s disgusting


  6. Maybe Cole wanted Chelsea to send him a Nudie suit while she was in LA. The country sequined to hell and back look would sure mix things up for them, and they could probably even get the sequins in a camouflage pattern.


  7. [* Shield plugin marked this comment as “Trash”. Reason: Failed Bot Test (checkbox) *]
    I know that shit makes me annoyed. The Misfits shirt on Briana made me want to throw up on her! The band tee thing needs to go away with these poser ass chicks. For those of us who actually listen to the music well we think you look incredibly stupid.


    1. My fav thing to do to teenagers in band t-shirts is to go, “oh, I love that band! What’s your fav song by them?” Watching them get confused is hilarious. On the plus side, I did it to my niece over a Nirvana shirt and she actually went and listened to them afterwards.


  8. Brianna looked really pathetic this week (I mean, she always does). But going to Puerto Rico with a married man during a pandemic for a dick appointment? Girl….


  9. Qloi is my favorite spelling you’ve done yet 😂 As someone with a college degree that earns waaaay less than these trashtastic classless pieces of gutter trash (minus Chelsea)…..I’m mad at myself for contributing to this dumpster fire all these years. But. I live a lonely, dull life so 😂😂😂😂


    1. Right there with ya Lorinda! I made it goal not to get pregnant and finish college…and yet I contribute to the $$$ these dumpster fires make. Ei Yi Yi

      Also, Qloi is the BEST one so far. I die LAUGHING reading these recaps and love the running gag on that name. Thanks Da Ashley


  10. We all know at this point Kail will keep on trying until she gets a girl. With her luck, she might end up with 13 boys before just like that family in Michigan. Lets just hope mumble Chris won’t be her father.


    1. Hey, maybe Kail can trade one of her boys for Caitlyn & Tyler’s girls, then we are spared more pregnancies by either of these train wrecks, jus sayin! JK people!


      1. Or if Briana has another girl from her latest gross soulmate then she and Kail can swap when Kail has her fifth son from Mr. Mumbles. Although I’d feel terrible for a boy trying to survive the DeJesus Coven. At least Devoin said he’ll make sure Nova doesn’t turn out that way.

        I didn’t know until reading the comments that Briana’s new man is (or at least was at the time of filming) married. She sure knows how to pick ’em. She’ll wind up preggers again and he’ll be another deadbeat. Wonder if her new man has other kids he barely sees or supports. Bri is too dumb to learn from her lessons.


  11. Im happy to see Leah taking the corona serious. She made some pretty bad calls in the past, but she reacted fast and the right way to protect her child.

    At this point im just fed up with Chelsea and Kail. Yes you still like plaid and ripped jeans and yeah you still pregnant ..

    Briana .. Girl 🤦🏼‍♀️


  12. Why did it take this long for Briana to get the dads to agree to child support? Nova is 9 years old, this should have been figured out less than a year with each dad after each child was born. The reason I think is so Briana has control over Nova seeing Devoin, if they go to court he will have a custody plan in place.

    I understand Devoin is not working high wage jobs, but the years when he didn’t have Nova 3-4 days a week (as he claims he does now) he should have contributed child support money.


  13. Brianna must not realize that Devoin and Luis could refuse to allow their kids to be filmed and then her storyline and the money she gets for them filming her lifs would be a wrap? Maybe she does realize this and that would explain why she wont take them to court to get child support. The first thing courts do is establish custody and if Devoin and Luis legally establish paternal rights Brianna will be SOL. She will probably have to pay them child support. Oh yes. If Luis claims he doesnt spend time with Stella because he has no stable home then just like with a woman the courts will order Brianna to spend part of that $200,000 salary to help Luis pay rent somewhere.


  14. Lolololol pretending to be an Iron Maiden fan. My first thought when I saw her shirt was “I wonder…..?”
    I could never wear something I’m not extremely passionate about.

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