‘Teen Mom 2’ Season 7B Episode 5 Recap: Crushed Mexican Dreams & A Concealed Pregnancy

“Those ding-dang baby-daddies ruin everything, y’all!”

Hey y’all! Gather ’round! It’s time for another Teen Mom 2 recap! Things have been getting pretty crazy in ‘Teen Mom 2’ Land, what with all the unexpected pregnancies, “non-pregnancies” and divorcing happening!

We start things off deep in the swampy hollers of West Virginia. As you’ll remember, Leah was forced to grab up her youngins and throw ’em into her trashmobile because the state of West Virginia was under water due to massive flooding. And–wouldn’t ya know?– Mother Nature didn’t have the decency to wait to unleash her fury until after Leah was completely moved into her new house!

“Go on now, all y’all kids scat so Mama can pack up all y’alls things!”

Dern that Mother Nature!

Luckily, the worst of the flooding is over and Leah can resume her moving. She sends off the kids with her glazy-eyed sis Victoria (who must have OD’d on canned cheese product or something right before shooting this scene…yeah, that’s it…). Once they’re gone, Leah is free to finish packing up the family’s stuff to “move it on up” to their new house!

“Lifting Leah’s box of frostings damn near killed me!”

Leah’s brother-in-law, Brian (who, by the way, does nothing to dispel all of those hillbilly stereotypes, right down to the actual red neck), stays behind to help Leah shovel the rest of her crap into the moving van.

It’s been stressful for Brian, who’s spent the better part of his day helping Leah box up three-year-old Mary Kay products, all of the “pills for the baby’s head”, a lifetime supply of Lunchables, and possibly a collection of banjos. He’s done been worked to the bone, y’all!

Leah explains that, while this move has been tiring, it’s been much easier than all of her other moves. Plus, this time Leah will be moving into her own home, rather than a rented abode, so it just feels different! She doesn’t even have to split the “wersher and dryer” up between her and an ex-husband this time around!

All that water in West Virginia and Victoria still looks like she wasn’t “wershed” in weeks?

Later that day, Victoria returns to help Leah and Brian haul the last piles of crap into the moving truck and then they head on down to the nicer part of the holler, where Leah and the girls will now be residing. The ‘Teen Mom 2’ crew greets Leah at her new home, and they celebrate Leah’s new home ownership.

Meanwhile, in South Dakota, Chelsea is calling her dad Randy to see if her baby-daddy Adam has thrown a few protein-shake-soaked dollar bills into the child support bank account. Randy says that Adam has made 1.5 payments in the last six months, so he is very behind on his child support. Chelsea doesn’t seem surprised.

When you know you’ll never be invited on vacation because…someone has to watch the kids…

Over in North Carolina, Barbara is taking her collection of grandchildren to the beach. She asks Jace about his recent trip to Florida with Jenelle and David. Jace reports that he had a great time, but that he missed Barb. Babs tells Jace that she hopes one day her “bitch of a daughta” and her boooooyfriend will invite her along on a trip so that they can all take a vacation as a family.

Oh, look at you, Babs, making a joke!

“I can’t wait until Nathan…er, I mean everyone…sees our new house!”

Meanwhile, Jenelle is thrilled because she and David have found a plot of land that they want to buy and build a house on.

Of course, there is much to be done before the house can be built. They must have the soil tested, and actually put the money down to purchase the land. (Not to mention, Jenelle has to at some point head on down to the Walmart and pick herself up another set of Mason jar glasses, since we all know that her old ones had a tendency of shattering on people’s heads…and stuff.)

Jenelle says she didn’t realize how big of a step building a house with a boyfriend is. (Usually, she and whatever back-from-the-dead creature she’s dating just make babies together. You know, nothing serious.)

“I guess it’s not a big deal because we already live in a house together, and we pay bills together,” Jenelle says.

“Back when I was with Kieffer, I’d get excited any time we moved to another part of the city park!”

Oh, look at you, Jenelle, making a joke about David helping to pay the bills!

“There’s so much possibilities we can do with this land!” Jenelle squeals.

SO MUCH POSSIBILITIES, PEOPLE! SO MUCH!

Finally we head to Delaware, where Kail is upset that all of Javi‘s stuff isn’t going to be out of the house right away. (Maybe Javi can call up Leah’s brother-in-law Brian and see if he can help him move? It would probably only cost Javi a pack of Marlboros and a bucket of chicken from The Colonel to get Brian’s services. Just sayin’…)

Javi’s new apartment isn’t ready yet, so Javi’ll be slummin’ it at the Holiday Inn for the next few days, because Kail won’t even hear of letting him stay in the house’s spare room.

“I sure told him!”

Javi’s trying to make pleasant conversation, asking Kail what she has planned for the day, but she snaps at him and tells him that what she’s doing is no longer his business. So…it’s basically just like when they were married. Javi is still trying to be nice, and things are getting awkward.

He asks her if she has days where she regrets what happened between them, and Kail basically has to stop herself from cracking up.

“I’m good right now,” she says.

Back in South Dakota, Chelsea and Aubree are going to see some turtles and talk about the baby Chelsea is pregnant with. That’s literally all they have to film for Chelsea.

Luckily, we can always count on good ol’ Leah to bring the sh*t show. She’s all moved into the new house and for some reason has her hair all pinned up like some sort of Amish schoolteacher. Later, though, she lets her hair down and gets ready to get wild because Victoria, Brian and Leah’s brother Isaac have come over to sit in the dirt out yonder behind Leah’s house and listen to Leah brag about all the places she’s considering taking the girls on vacation.

Jesus God (Victoria)…

Poor Victoria looks like she can barely afford a hairbrush so it must be hard to hear that her sister is going to be living it up in Hawaii.

Unfortunately, though, Leah can’t go to Hawaii. She explains that it’s a 22 hour flight from The WV to Hawaii, and that’s just plumb too long! There’s no way she and the girls could “set” still for that long.

Let’s stop here for a minute. How does Leah figure that it takes 22 hours to fly from West Virginia to Hawaii!? Is she strapping cardboard wings to that dern Corey Tyler and having him fly them all over there or what?!

Of course, there’s always the possibility that Leah has no idea where the hell Hawaii actually is on a map. After all, the schools “are not well” in West Virginia.

“Do you KNOW how many cans of Cheez-Whiz I’d have to pack for my babies on a 22-hour flight!?”

What’s sad is that no one in this group has even picked up on the fact that Leah’s estimation of the flight length is ridiculously wrong. (For the record, a non-stop flight from West Virginia to Hawaii is about nine hours, give or take. Add in a layover and it may take about 12 hours of total travel time to get there. Thanks Google.)

Luckily, though, Leah has found a vacation spot that’s much closer to the Home Sweet Holler: Mexico!

Victoria is worried about Leah taking her litter out of the country. (At least, I think that’s what she was saying. It was hard to tell, what with all her slurring and pausing and whatnot.)

Leah explains that she’s in the process of getting the girls their passports, but she’s worried that the girls’ dads may have an issue with her taking their kids out of the country. She’s particularly worried about Jeremy saying yes, being that she flipped out when he recently took Addie to Ohio with him. Leah is scared that Jeremy will say no to Addie going to Mexico and she’ll have to say “adios” to her vacation plan.

Never was any man so excited to see a stack of State Farm bills…

Back in Delaware, things are still tense between Javi and Kail. Javi has come to the house to collect all of the mail he got while he was deployed. Kail takes the mail out of the bin she’s been storing it in (i.e. the trashcan) and pushes it toward Javi. As Javi sifts through his State Farm bills and Drake Fan Club newsletters, Kail is getting visibly annoyed.

“Can you, like, open your mail at your hotel or something?” Kail asks. “This isn’t your home anymore!”

Yikes.

Kail tells Javi that she needs him to leave the house, because she has a lot of important tasks to take care of.

“I need to go to Starbucks and stuff,” she says.

I…can’t….

“What am I supposed to do? Just not get Starbucks?!”

Javi can’t believe that he’s getting kicked out of the house so that Kail can go satisfy her urge for a $10 Cafe Cappa-whatever-rich-people-drink.

Before Javi leaves, though, Kail demands that he turn in his house keys. She’s worried that Javi will use them to sneak into the house in the middle of the night and crawl in bed with her and/or drink her Starbucks…or something…

Javi is in disbelief. He returns with the house keys and Kail actually double checks his key ring to make sure he didn’t hold back a house key for prowling purposes.

“David like Jenelle. David put baby in Jenelle’s stomach.”

Meanwhile, Jenelle and David are heading out to see their land. Jenelle is getting impatient and tells David that they need to “hurry up on this…especially now…” David then reaches over and rubs Jenelle’s stomach/crotch area.

They start talking about how “ecstatic” they are about “something” that made them at first feel “shocked.” They aren’t revealing what they’re talking about but…this is Jenelle so it can only be one of two things: either Walgreens is having a sale on eyebrow pencils or Jenelle has done got knocked up again.

All of a sudden, Jenelle seems to remember that she’s being watched by MTV Big Brother via the car cameras, but she seems to very badly want everyone to “guess” her secret.

“I’ll just start wearing big hoodies from now on,” Jenelle says as she creepily rubs her stomach.

Hmmmm…. I wonder what they could possibly be talking about. Could it be….THIS?! Of course not. Because Jenelle was NOT pregnant guys…come on. Obviously.

“I need a new job…and also a comb…”

Later, the show’s producers come over to talk to Jenelle and David about the big secret thing that they had been talking about in the car. Producer Kristen asks the couple if they have “any news” they’d like to share with the producers. Producer Kristen plays back the tape that was filmed during Jenelle and David’s car conversation, and they both just there and giggle stupidly. The producer straight-out asks them if they’re expecting a baby.

“No,” Jenelle insists in the same tone she used to use to tell Babs that she wasn’t hungover, but was just tired, had a headache and felt like she was going to throw up. “Actually I’m not at all.”

Off the subject, but can anyone explain why David looks like he just went 12 rounds in the ring with Rocky Balboa?

The producer, of course, isn’t buying it. She demands to know what Jenelle and David are talking about in that conversation, if it isn’t the Spawn of David being implanted in Jenelle’s frequently-used womb. They insist they were just excited about their new land.

“Are you hoping it’s a boy or a girl land?” one of the producers asks.

You see what he did there?

“It’s so funny she doesn’t believe you!” David tells Jenelle.

“Leah ain’t takin’ no youngin of mine out of the good ol’ US of A!”

Meanwhile, Jeremy is sitting in his camper in South Dakota when he gets a text message from Leah. She tells him that she can no longer take the girls to Hawaii, due to the 22-hour flight.

THINK OF THE BABIES!

Leah tells Jeremy that she wants to instead take the kids to a Mexican resort that’s “kid-orient-tated.”

Jeremy’s dad doesn’t like the idea of his grandbaby being done there with those “Mex-eye-cans,” where babies are getting snatched up.

“Down in Mexico, it’d be easy for somebody to grab up Leah and them kids!” Jeremy’s dad says. “It’s just got me shiverin’ like a house cat!”

AS.YOU.DO.

“She ain’t takin’ my grandbaby to that kidnapper’s paradise! No sir!”

Seriously, all this scene needed was Antoine Dodson doing the running-man inside the camper while singing his “Hide Yo Wife! Hide Yo Kids” song! (By the way, that song will never not be funny in The Ashley’s eyes.)

Before Jeremy totally shoots down Leah’s “tequila wishes and taquito dreams”, though, he wants to know what Corey thinks of Leah’s plan to take the youngins to the savage streets of Mexico. He rings up Corey and asks him if he’s planning to let the twins go to Mexico. Corey responds with his classic line.

“Huh?”

Corey has no idea about the trip. Jeremy informs him that Leah is planning on taking the kids to Mexico. And not even that new-fangled Mexico–the REAL Mexico!

“I ain’t heard ’bout nuthin’!” Corey says.

“I knew this was one of them Leah capers!”

Jeremy hangs up with Corey and calls up Leah. Leah insists that she just hadn’t gotten around to telling Corey about the Mexico plan. Jeremy asks Leah, hypothetically, if she’d be OK with him taking Addie to Bora Bora. That’s not really a fair question, because Leah pretty much thinks “Bora Bora” is something she and the girls are going to be eating in Mexico.

Leah insists that she trusts Addie to be with Jeremy. Next, they start fighting about the time Jeremy took Addie to Ohio without Leah’s “permission.” Jeremy makes it clear that he’s not happy about Leah’s Mexico plan.

‘Teen Mom 2’ is basically just 45 minutes of footage showing these people talking or texting on their cell phones…

Meanwhile, Chelsea is texting with Adam’s other baby-mama Taylor. Apparently, Adam is super-behind in paying child support to Taylor too. Adam owes Taylor as much as $5,600 and Chelsea about $3,500. Taylor is hoping the court nails Adam for all the child support he owes them. (Maybe they’ll even throw him in jail! Think of all the gym seshs he’d miss! That’s the way to hit him where it really hurts: take away his bench-pressing!)

Speaking of Adam, Producer Mandi has to go down to the gym to locate Adam. He’s still pouting about being misrepresented on ‘Teen Mom 2’, and Producer Mandi asks why Adam never has any friends around when he films.

“I don’t have any friends,” he tells her. “No one wants to film.”

“This is no fair. I’m not talking to you guys anymore!”

Not even Adam’s once-trusty filming pal Justin is interested in showing his mug on-camera anymore.

“There’s no positivity  ever for any of the guys on this show,” Adam says, before discussing how Chelsea is in a “little fantasy world” with Cole because she’s about to get married.

“She’s trying to push me out of the picture completely, but she’s pretty quick to collect a $980 child support check,” Adam says.

Since Adam brought up child support, Producer Mandi asks him if he is all caught up. Adam insists that he is. Producer Mandi makes arrangements to film Adam with Aubree the next day, but when the crew arrives, Adam is refusing to answer the door. The crew goes to wait in the car, and all of a sudden they see Adam’s truck pull out of the garage and burn rubber down the street.

Mandi is in shock, so she calls Adam to see what’s going on. He, of course, doesn’t answer the phone.

In Delaware, we are checking in with Jo and Vee. Apparently Jo and Javi talked the night before on the phone, and Jo informed Javi that he is free to take Isaac whenever he wants to. Jo sees the importance of continuing the relationship between Javi and Isaac, which is surprisingly mature and respectable of Jo. (He’s come a long way! I’m proud of ya, buddy!)

“If you’re gonna yell at Javi, please be sure to do it on camera. Thanks.”

At Kail’s, Producer J.C. is chatting with Kail about Javi. Kail is insistent that she doesn’t want Javi in the house because he’s all up in her space. She is hoping for a Javi-free house as soon as possible.

The next day, Javi takes Lincoln and Isaac out to lunch, along with some family members and friends. Someone asks Lincoln what kind of room he wants at Javi’s house, and Isaac starts talking about how he’ll decorate his room. The only problem is that Isaac won’t have a room at Javi’s. (Anyone else think it was kind of crappy for Javi’s friend to bring up the room stuff right in front of Isaac? Geez.)

Javi tells Isaac that Kail will be talking to him about the room situation, but later promises Isaac that he’ll always have a special room in the house. (Why not just get two beds and put them in Lincoln’s room? Problem solved.)

“I’m kinda surprised Leah even knew where Mexico was!”

Back in The WV, Leah is mad that Jeremy called up Corey and got him all riled up about Mexico. She heads to what looks like an abandoned trailer park to exchange the twin youngins with Corey, and the Mexico trip comes up. She apologizes to Corey for him having to hear about Mexico from Jeremy instead of from her.

They proceed to hillbilly-grumble over each other for a few minutes. They’re both talking at the same time, so I have idea what the hell was discussed. Words is hard, y’all.

The next day, Victoria drags her lifeless corpse back over to Leah’s house to talk crap on Jeremy. Leah is ranting about Jeremy calling up Corey and trying to ruin the Mexico trip.

“He does irrational things!” Leah says.

“He’s irrational, I tells ya!”

Now, call me crazy, but I don’t really think Leah is a person who should be judging anyone’s actions in terms of rationality. Just sayin’…

“Jeremy didn’t even give me a chance to talk to Corey!” Leah shouts.

#DoubleBabyDaddyProblems

Leah claims that Jeremy was intentionally trying to be a ding-dang trouble-causer and was trying to create drama between her and Corey.

Finally, we check back in with Jenelle one last time. She tells us in a voice-over that she and David got into a minor car accident a few weeks back.

“The police report was leaked and it had personal information in it,” Jenelle tells us. “Now everyone is spreading rumors about me being pregnant.”

UM…they can’t be “rumors” if they are true, Jenelle! (She must have gone to one of those “not well” schools down in West Virginia or something.) Jenelle is reading all about her pregnancy on Twitter and is freaking out.

“Apparently it’s my fault that David stuck his Ding-Dong into my bitch of a daughta’s unmarried Ho-Ho and she got pregnant!”

Word of Jenelle’s pregnancy has spread to Babs’ place. The producer sits down with Barb, who reads aloud from a story that states that Jenelle confirmed she is pregnant in the police report from the accident. This is apparently the first time that Babs is hearing that Jenelle has yet another bun in her oven.

“I just asked her if it was true and she said, ‘Oh my god! I can’t believe you’re in my business again!'” Barb said.

(By the way, during this time Jenelle was having a massive freak-out session online.)

Barb says that Jenelle is refusing to tell her if she’s pregnant or not, because Jenelle feels she can’t trust Babs.

“I says, ‘This is not my fault! You’re mad at me, you’re mad at the Jenelle haters, you’re mad at the world'” Babs tells the producer. “If ya pregnant, it’s gonna come out sooner or lata!”

Babs has no idea why Jenelle is being so secretive about this pregnancy. After all, she was relatively open and proud during her other 100 pregnancies or so.

“I hope Juh-nelle donates her reproductive system ta science one day! It’s a medical marvel!”

“Jesus Christ! She’s gonna have anotha baby with anotha guy she hasn’t even known a year. This is her fourth pregnancy and she’s 24 years old. When is she gonna get it and grow up?!” Babs exclaims, before pointing out that David and Jenelle will have each had three children with three different people.

Babs is worried how Jace will take the news. She’s worried that Jace will be hurt that Jenelle is having yet another baby even though she still doesn’t have custody of him.

Right after this scene, MTV throws in one of those itsyoursexlife.org pitches to encourage girls to prevent unwanted pregnancies. I think that was a nice touch.

Next week, Jenelle finally admits she’s pregnant, Isaac is bothered by the fighting between Javi and Kail, and Producer Mandi confronts Adam for being a douche.

To read The Ashley’s other ‘Teen Mom 2’ recaps, click here!

(Photos: MTV)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

82 Comments

  1. Omg this is the BEST! It’s like you took the words right out of my mouth. I actually found this because I had to google how long a flight from WV to Hawaii ACTUALLY was. God she’s retarded. I have a very strong dislike for all of the teen mom’s on this show. Out of all of them, I suppose I hate Chelsea the least. I do however can’t stand how she does her hair and makeup. Holy shit girl cool it with the eyeliner. Anyway. Yes, they are all trashy in their own ways. I’m glad I found your blog:)


  2. Disappointed this site is no longer doing recaps for every episode. If there is enough material to do every recap for Sister Wives and Counting on, there’s got to be enough TM trash for more recaps. =(


      1. So I’ve read online that Kailyn is shopping around for a spinoff show. Please tell me there’s no truth to a “Kailyn Lowry Show” in the works? The last thing that woman needs is another reason to justify her self-entitled abusive behaviour. The only reason I pay any attention to this ungrateful brat is because she struck the lottery with her Baby Daddies and I enjoy seeing them interact with Isaac and Lincoln each week.


  3. Little Isaac is so lucky to have Jo being the adult and talking him through this traumatic divorce. Kailin is being so selfish in the callous way she is responding to Isaac. Javi is his dad. My stepson still sees his stepdad who his mom divorced four years ago.


  4. Juh-nelle needs her tubes tied and David needs to butt out of Juh-nelle’s co-parenting relationships. He’s constantly trying to cause trouble between her and Nathan and Babs.

    Leah and her sister are obviously both high on every dang episode and no one seems to notice/care!?

    Chelsea is as boring as ever and has outgrown the show.

    Kailyn is a self-entitled selfish brat that needs to remember where she came from. Someone needs to teach her the meaning of “civil” because she clearly doesn’t understand what it means. I don’t know why people are surprised by her antics, she’s treated every man she has ever come in contact with the same exact way. She’s physically assaulted both Jo and Javi, yet people still try to find ways to blame the Baby Daddies for her failed relationships. She should be happy that her husband and father of her children came home safe after a 6 month deployment. As a woman who has seen many family members join both the Canadian and USA armed forces, I can say without a doubt that no matter where your loved one is sent, you’ll find yourself praying for their safe return every day they are gone. Of course, one must have a heart in order to care, so perhaps that is why Kail didn’t appreciate her good fortune. She’s delusional if she thinks she’ll ever find a man willing to put up with her miserable demanding fake a$$. There is no excuse for her behaviour and people have to stop giving her the benefit of the doubt simply because she WAS a “Teen Mom.”

    None of these franchise WOMEN are 16 anymore and not one of them has accomplished anything significant despite being given a free ride for having a kid at 16. They call themselves “role models” but are the furthest thing from being such. Yes, some of them have gone to “school” but not one of them has actually done anything with their “education” or become contributing members of society. Although Farrah has accomplished the most out of these women, I wouldn’t call her a contributing member of society given that all of her actions are always 100% selfish and rarely result in good thing for others. If anything, the Dads are the only success stories associated with this franchise, yet they’re always being blamed for the problems that plague the Mom’s lives. It’s just such a shame.


  5. Kail, no doubt it’s awkward when dealing with a recent ex, but suck it up for those precious boys, seriously!!! These last few episodes showed your inner b*tch. I feel even more sorry for Javi than I did previously. He was too good for you in the first place, and now it’s clear to everyone that he has more class in his baby finger than you have in your big ol’ tattoo-ed man arms. He is a good dad – even to Isaac. Unbelievable. Seriously. Wow, did you eff up.


  6. It’s funny how Adam always says that Mtv makes ALL the guys on the show look bad. As far as I know, most people know that Corey is a good person and a wonderful father. I don’t think people dislike Jo either who seems to be a good father as well. Adam, get it through your head! Editing can only do so much. YOU are the reason people don’t like you, not Mtv.


  7. Was Leah starting a new fashion trend w her “bathroom #3” sticker that she wore all episode? At first I thought it had something to do w volunteering, like she was part of a volunteer group that was working on bathroom #3, or that should use bathroom #3, lol


  8. It’s so funny they are airing an episode of her denying being pregnant while she just gave birth. You can’t make this up, that’s a new way of stupid.


  9. I usually LOVE these recaps, but lately they seem a little more biased than usual. I know Jeremy did a few interviews with The Ashley recently, but he’s been behaving like such a child as of late and The Ashley is too soft on him. Just my opinion.


    1. When has Jeremy acted like a child this season? If anything, Leah is doing stuff to antagonize him so that she can to all of a sudden make him look like the irrational bad parent. How could he go from, according to her, the good one to co-parent with to the bad one to co-parent with as soon as he got engaged to Brook? She’s jealous, she’s trying to make herself look like the victim because the fans don’t buy her BS anymore. On the reunion she said that Jeremy worked too much and didn’t spend time with Addie…but last episode she was complaining that Jeremy wouldn’t answer his phone while he was…wait for it…spending time with Addie. Leah is seriously a joke, and her antics and their “editing” isn’t fooling anyone.


        1. And lexi has made a comment ( her opinion) so you need to relax, Sarah.

          It’s ok for you to have one but not others Eh????


      1. He acted like a child when he threw a bitch fit about mtv’s “editing” when really it was Leah that that said he acted his engagement was “no big deal.”


  10. Adam is such a douche. He blames MTV and Chelsea but they both have given him every chance and every time he blows it. You can’t hide a shitty personality. Kail is just annoying. Javi is equally to blame for their marriage not working but he was just trying to be civil and figure out a new normal and she does what she always does. She cuts people out when they are no longer useful to her. I feel so bad for Isaac.
    Also when Jeremy and his father were having their convo I could NOT WAIT to read the recap and Ashley’s thoughts! Omg! I was cracking up.


  11. So little Watson Cole has arrived 3weeks early ?
    Chelsea Prob got her dates wrong, since she’s not that bright.
    However congrats


  12. Kail is the definition of a true selfish bi&ch! While being petty and spiteful towards Javi, she is just causing damage to her poor son! Isaac and Lincoln will both resent her in the future when they are old enough to look the show up and see how mean she was! Jenelle will never grow up as long as stupid guys who probably only want her for her money will keep impregnating her! If they ever do get around to building a house, they will be in foreclosure within a year or two! Jenelle and Leah need to get jobs!!!


  13. 5..4..3..2..1 RANT GO!!! Ugh where do I start? Jenelle with her I have come to the realization that you can’t fix stupid. She is 50 shades of stupid. Enough said about her no need to rant on her BS that everyone already knows.
    Leah is so delusional she is spending her money like water. She is the prime example of a broke person winning the lottery. This is what her like 5th house in 2 years? A trip to Mexico who is that more for her or her family? Don’t blame the Dads (plural common thing on this show) for putting their foots down on that.
    Kail I can see both sides of it. She didn’t want what he wanted those two were toxic from the start. I have a lot of military friends and they all told me that the only marriages that really work in that setting are when both are in active duty or one of them grew up in a military family. Cause they get it so I am kind of not surprised it didn’t work.
    Chelsea she was as stupid as these other girls but she finally grew up so not much to say about her


  14. ****This is a rant***
    -It’s time the producers throw in the towel on Adumb….between him and Farrah I dunno who is more disrespectful….at least Farrah knows she is and owns it….Adumb just wants to play victim and have this woah is me attitude. Talking about how he doesn’t have any friends and blah blah blah…ever think you don’t have any friends because you’re an awful person?? If nobody wants to be around you, then YOU’RE the problem…He wants to complain that MTV shows all the guys in a bad light….um NO…just YOU and Nathan because you guys are selfish, terrible human beings. The other dads are shown in a light that’s just fine. Here MTV was trying to set up times for him to redeem himself, and he just left. MTV needs to cut their losses with him and not film him anymore. He’s not interesting, he’s a jackass. It’s heartbreaking to see the way he treats Aubree anyway…And Chelsea wants to push him out of the picture, but she’ll cash those checks?? DUDE! 1. You haven’t been paying her 2. you didn’t want Aubree in the first place and 3. anytime you do have her, she’s with your parents! I could go on an on but I’m done. Hopefully this is his last season and he can go off into oblivion.

    -I think Victoria is suffering from “anxiety and depression” now. She had the same glossed over look in her eye as Leah did for the past 2 seasons. Did anyone pick up when she asked Leah about the girls pasT-ports? LOL

    -Once again, Leah was trying to make it look like everyone was ganging up on her. She threw a FIT about Jeremy taking Addie to Ohio…ranting and raving about how he’s terrible and doesn’t “communicate”…but turns around and is like I wanna take the girls outta the country! C’mon dummy. You set yourself up with that one. And anyone else notice how awkward her conversations with Corey are? LOL He wants no parts of her.


    1. I agree Lex. Adam is a joke. Adam, Leah and Farrah are people that live in their own reality and just can’t see things for what they really are. In their minds, they are the victims and can do not wrong. Unfortunately, Mtv puts up with them because they bring in the drama that people crave when watching a reality show.


        1. It’s the Leah and Adam comments that especially get down voted on this site. They’re not fooling anyone lol we all know it’s them doing it…but you’re right…Teen Mom OG was EXTRA boring until they brought Farrah back. As much as I HATE her, her situation is so dysfunctional that it’s really hard not to watch….and I think that’s why Teen Mom 2 has never been cancelled…At some point, every single one of those girls life has been in shambles…and at different times. Chelsea was a HOT mess with Adam back in the day, Kail was cheating on Jo then the dramatic fighting with Javi, Adam still sucks, Leah has a special needs daughter, and then Leah proceeded to turn into a pill popper, and Jenelle has been a disaster since the beginning.


        2. Why in the world did your comment get so many dislikes?? There has to be a Jenelle and Leah army on here seriously.


    2. Farrah and own it don’t mix, she never admits when she’s at fault, she always lays the blame with others.

      So your very much wrong on that


  15. Wow. My comment is not here. Everytime I make a comment it says it’s in moderation. What’s up with that? Ive been commenting for an entire year and all of a sudden they are moderated and not showing up.


  16. Okay, think of your exes, think of the painful breakups you have had.
    Now, your ex has told you he doesn’t want you anymore cause you have lost his child and don’t feel like becoming pregnant again, you actually have other goals for your life and children besides having more kids. Auch!
    On top of that, he told you he can’t wait to divorce you until he returns home (I don’t know, maybe talk about it face to face?), he wants to be a single man a.s.a.p.. Auch!
    The cherry to top it of; inappropriate tweets etc by him on social media and an inappropriate photo.
    He ignores you before he comes home. Auch!

    Your ex comes to your house to pick up his mail and all of a sudden, he wants to “hang with you” and hang around in your house. He would only pick up his mail and you both agreed to not discuss the divorce openly anymore. However, MTV is filming at your house.

    Downvote when you would leap with joy and would eagerly have him sit down to have a nice chat with your new best friend after everything that has happened, for the first time, while MTV films it. Hell you even bought cake and cookies for the occasion.

    Upvote when your mood would turn sour and you would tell him to leave after he slowly goes through his mail and even starts to open his mail.


  17. I actually hate the format of breaking the 4th wall. It just means that more time is spent chatting shit to the producers and not on the actual storylines of the show. It turned Teen Mom into boring drivel and now it’s doing the same for Teen Mom 2. Yes the shows are a car crash but it’s trash TV gold!


  18. The part about strapping cardboard wing to that ‘gersh-dern Corey Tyler’ bahahaha, I was laughing so hard. The Ashley, you’re the best.


  19. Adam wants MTV to let him out of his contract because the MTV money is exactly the reason that his baby mamas are getting so much child support. He was happily collecting his MTV paychecks when he was paying Chelsea like $40 a week for Aubree; he suddenly got all pouty and worried about how the cameras were affecting his reputation when Chelsea took him back to court and scored a big increase (Taylor, too). Now that those big paydays are adversely affecting his ability to buy his next douche-mobile and his muscle milk, he suddenly has a problem. Personally, I’d be happy to never glimpse his face on my TV again but I do kind of enjoy the fact that he’s being made to film and that a good percentage of his paycheck is going to support his daughters.

    Whether Chelsea needs that money to actually provide for Aubree is neither here nor there – Adam has a legal obligation to support his children. I know some women who have never spent a dime of whatever support they receive; they put that money into an account for their child to get later in life (such as to pay for college) and they take care of their child’s needs with their own salary. Chelsea is probably doing the same thing for Aubree.


    1. I agree! I hate when people are like “well these moms can afford not to get child support”. So the dad’s now get off the hook because mom makes a lot? Last time I checked, it takes two to make a baby.


  20. Kail is such a bitch. She’s a bitch to everyone. Can’t stand her.

    I felt so bad for Isaac when he was at the restaurant with Javi’s family. 🙁

    Leah…can’t stand her. Buuut, not the white knight, I looked into a Hawaiian vacation recently, but nixed the idea when I found that the flights were 20-24 hours. So the 22 hours didn’t seem off to me, and I’d be flying from the east coast as well….??

    Chelsea. Fine, yawn.

    Janelle….lol dumbass. Can’t explain away that hoodie comment.


    1. Yeah, when Leah said 22 hours I also thought she was nuts, but I looked it up on Orbitz and the total travel time was 21 hours with two stopovers. Maybe she was looking to go on vacation soon and all the good flights were sold out and she had to do two stopovers. Also, I think there would be at least one stopover…I can’t imagine an airline having a non-stop flight from WV to Hawaii.


  21. I can’t stop laughing when I read the portions about Leah! I could literally hear her talking like that!!! Thanks The Ashley!


  22. I don’t think it was right for Kail to treat Javi so badly but I thought it was a little ridiculous that he was acting like everything was all fine and dandy. He should’ve left the house as soon as she gave him the mail. Him sitting there and opening all those envelopes was just weird and awkward lol.


    1. I can see how he wouldn’t be super excited to run off to a hotel room though and also how he probably still feels like Kail’s house is his home. It’s where he’s raised his family and where he’s been living for years. After coming back from his deploymemt, he probably wants to spend some time in a real home and is not excited about trading in one anonymous hotel-like living quarters for another. I also think they had a lot to sort out and talk about (like the kids and their coparenting going forward) and maybe he was sticking around in hopes that he and kail could have an actual conversation about things (especially as they never seemed to really talk when he was deployed and kept saying they’d figure things out when he got home). As he left he even asked “Are we ever going to sit down and talk about things sometime?”


      1. Not to mention that the divorce was only filed – NOT final. It was, at that point, Javi’s house, too. In the eyes of the law, he could have demanded to live there. She had no legal right to throw him out, as far as I know (one divorce under my belt – hopefully never again). I thought Kail acted like a complete b*tch, personally.


  23. I cannot thank The Ashley enough for this recap. I had a doo-doo day and was in a foul mood until I read this. I haven’t had a chance to watch this ep yet because I have work to do at home for tomorrow, but at least I can actually get started now that I’m no longer in a Kail-type negative mood. My mood has improved “dramastically”! Thank you again for this and every other recap!


  24. You know that old saying – KARMA IS A BITCH? Well, Kail pushed the relationship between Javi & Isaac. Javi tried to wring more child support out of Jo. Now they’re both unhappy, and only have themselves to blame.


    1. and Jo seems very happy and stable with Vee and the baby…Javi and Kail did do Jo pretty dirty…for Jo to get choked up when he asked Kail to work with him on the child support was pretty sad….and Javi just sat there like NO! Jo is a dead beat!….Jo has definitely come a long way. Hopefully Javi will mature a lot and Kail will break down a wall and they will be able to co-parent as well as Jo and Kail.


  25. Jenelle, kail, and leah all showed their crazies this episode, but holy cow Adam! There is no way he can claim he just got the bad edit bc they’re out to get him in this episode. He literally ran away from the crew after he had MADE AN APPOINTMENT to film w them and show himself spending quality time w Aubree. It’s not like they harassed him and he was made to film against his will so all they had to show was him being whiney to his producer bc Aubree was w Chelsea.
    And who just speeds away in their truck rather than reschedule or explain why theu can’t film? Maybe you say “Aubree is still at my mom’s bUT I’m heading over now to see her.” But just running away from an appointment that YOI made, for an hour that was convenient for you, that you had time to prepare for?
    Also enjoyed his straight face lie about being all caught up on child support w his supporting proof being that he was not currently in jail for being behind.


    1. Also wondering why Chelsea’s Dad is the one monitoring the child support payments bank account? Did anyone else find it a little bit creepy/strange that she is sharing bank account information with her father and that he is very well informed and up-to-date on exactly how much money is in it/not yet paid into it, while she didn’t seem to have any clue?

      And the devil’s advocate part of me wants to say: If you are well enough off that you do not need to take any money out of your child support bank account for a few months (to the point where you are not even sure whether or not your baby’s father has paid into it), then why are you insisting on regular, higher child support payments? And I absolutely get that Adam is Aubree’s dad and he NEEDS to contribute to her upkeep out of principle whether or not Chelsea can support her on her own, but I just thought that if I were Adam and if I were being hounded to pay more and more child support that is then just sitting in a bank account and not being used towards the day-to-day expenses for my child, then why do I need to pay so much?


      1. Just because she doesn’t use it for day to day exspenses doesn’t mean he doesn’t need to pay what a court has ordered. She can save all of that money for her daughters college education. Ridiculous.


        1. “Why do I need to pay so much?”
          Because you helped make the child in which the money is going to? Because it’s the right thing to do? Because if you’re gonna be a useless piece of shit and hardly be around then it’s literally the bare minimum of what you should actually be doing?


        2. absolutely, and up until Chelsea took Adam to court, didn’t they say he was giving her $150 a month?…ONE HUNDRED FIFTY DOLLARS! That’s $75 once every 2 weeks! What is that supposed to get Aubree? An outfit, some notebooks, a backpack, and a burger?? Good parents want the best for their kids. Randy even said that Adumb has spent more money on cars than he has on Aubree. It’s disgusting. More power to Chelsea being smart with the money for Aubree. It’s not like Chelsea is spending the money on herself..she already has her own money. I still think part of the reason why he wants off the show is so that he can go back to paying $150 a month, because we all know he doesn’t have any real skills and would probably try to go on unemployment to get out of paying that much. He’s such a scumbag.


        3. I do absolutely agree with you and think he should pay and that he has the money to pay, and if he doesn’t then where is all his money from the showing going to?, but I was just saying that I could see how he might be frustrated about it bc Chelsea doesn’t use the money regularly or even seem to know how much is in the account. I don’t agree with him, but could see how he might feel about it.


          1. And why does it matter if she doesn’t use it on a regular basis? Not like he actually pays on a regular basis to begin with so it’s not like she can utilize it. And the thing is, no one gives a fuck about how he feels because well, he doesn’t give a fuck about Aubree or Paisley for that matter.


          2. How you can even “see how he might feel” is beyond me. No, just, no, sympathizing with deadbeats, in any fashion, is just inconceivable 😉

            As for the money, and why Randy is “in charge”, or rather the actual truth, has joint access, it is because he helps invest some of the money and ALL of the money the dumbass Adam does pay(the very little of it he pays) goes towards Aubree’s future. This is actually the absolute best use of that money, if Chelsea does not need it right this second. In fact, it’s the most intelligent use of the money, even if it were Chelsea making investments herself. At least Chelsea is smart enough to realize that having joint access with her father-who has had this joint access since the beginning-is a wise move..for *Aubree, who is all that really matters here.

            Adumb doesn’t have a leg to stand on here..not one single leg. There is no “understanding how he might feel”, that’s beyond illogical, lol.


          3. Yikes, I appear to have stirred up a hornet’s nest here! Maybe what I should have written was: I can imagine Adam saying something like “Why should I have to pay so much or pay regularly when Chelsea doesn’t even seem to use the money or even know if I’m making payments,” and HE would consider that to be a legitimate excuse whereas I, the commenter, do not consider that to be a valid excuse. I don’t sympathize with him and I don’t think he should get out of paying child support. And it makes sense that while Chelsea may not be using his money for the day-to-day expenses (because how could she when he pays so irregularly?), she is probably saving it all up for Aubree’s future education. Sorry to have come off as an Adam-sympathizer, because I really think he’s a huge jerk.


      2. Adams’s making the MTV money, so why shouldn’t he pay his fair share of raising his daughter? It’s not like he makes up for it by being father of the year, that’s for sure!


      3. I also think it is weird that Belchsea has to ask her dad about Aubrey’s child support bank account and how much Adam has paid.
        Maybe she asked him to handle it to avoid the stress?

        As far as needing the money, I think most married people doing as well as Adam and Chelsea with children will set up a nice college fund/ life fund for their child and spend more money on education, sports, etc.
        It is not the child’s fault it’s parent don’t live in one house sharing costs and don’t have a good marriage.
        Why should Adam be allowed to spend more money on himself instead of his children than their mothers can?
        Also, Chelsea has primary so she is the logical parent to set up and manage Aubrey’s fund(s).


        1. I think that’s what it is….she probably has her father in charge so that if anything happens to her, he will know what’s going on. I hope that she has it set up so that if something happens to her Adam won’t be able to get a hold of anything…plus Randy is a successful dentist or oral surgeon (I’m not sure which one), I’m sure he has great financial advisers that Chelsea uses, so she probably just lets him handle everything.


      4. Because that is AUBREE’S money and should be set aside for her future. Mom and Dad are both legally obligated to support their child until the child turns 18. Why wouldn’t any good mom set aside what is legally delegated to her child, if she were fortunate enough to be able to do so?! Why would you not fight for every penny that has been given to your child, so that said child can have the best future available to him or her? #mindblown


  26. If 75% of Teen Mom footage is talking to or texting friends/family/baby mamas and daddies, then the other 25% HAS to be footage of the girls moving and/or going on vacation. Which leaves 0% for footage of actual jobs.

    And why won’t MTV just let Adam out of his contract, stop paying him, and call it a day? I have zero interest in seeing anything that has to do with him, and I doubt any other viewers would care if they never saw him again. Give him what he wants and get the cameras off him. Then we’ll see how caught up he is with child support once this gravy train rides out of town.


  27. Leah is so dramatic lol I can’t stand it. Kail is just insane. The last episode where she freaked out about the car seats was just ridiculous. Does anyone else think her ass looks ridiculous or is that just me


  28. “Jo sees the importance of continuing the relationship between Javi and Isaac, which is surprisingly mature and respectable of Jo.”

    JO! I always knew he’d turn out to be a pretty good guy. Javi is a good guy. Wtf did they ever date Kail? She’s an awful person inside and out. Clearly both men have been excellent fathers, why would she have a problem with Isaac going to Javi’s with his brother? Not like he’s Adam or something. Oh right. Because she’s a selfish twat.

    And c’mon Leah. Jesus God, Jeremy was calling Corey to see if maybe HE IS being irrational about the girlses going to Mexico, and clearly your shady bitch ways pissed them both off because they’re both excellent fathers! Girlfriend, it could be worse! You could be Janelle for example.


    1. And Kail kept saying that she hoped Javi would want to continue having a relationship with Isaac, but now she seems to be making it so hard and so awkward for him to do so! The whole car seat debacle, and then immediately jumping in to say he can’t have a room at Javi’s, and suddenly reminding Isaac that Javi is only Lincoln’s dad and probably just Lincoln will be going there for visits. And it seems like she made all these decisions/assertions without even talking to Javi about what his intentions were. I know she said she wasn’t going to BEG Javi to spend time w Isaac, but she seems like she is trying to make JAVI beg and fight really hard to see Isaac.


  29. It’s painfully obvious that Kail only loved Javi for his military benefits. What a piece of shit she is. HE really loved YOU, trash. Why, I have no idea. But he did. Maybe NOT laugh in his face.


  30. Jenelle always looks high..Chelsea is perfecto ..Kail is a B*tchhhhh toward Javi…and Leah,do something with your Hair!! Damn girl, you look awful…skinny but fugly ! Js


  31. I really don’t think that the day of the kids from going on vacation I really just think that each other should have to know where they’re going and that should be it


  32. Does Aubree have a speech impediment of some kind? She seems to be a bit “mush mouthed” for a 6 year old, but I don’t hear her talk enough to really determine the extent. A few episodes ago they were using subtitles for her, which were necessary for me to be able to tell what she was saying. I hope that her school offers a speech therapist if she needs one.


    1. Well, with her mom always using that creepy baby talk/baby voice around her, I wouldn’t rule out a speech impediment. Still, I think it’s more along the lines of Aubree being aware of the cameras around her and shying away from them. Over the past few seasons, she seemed so perceptive of the things happening around her. Also, it could be due to her losing her milk teeth. Tooth gaps can definitely affect your speech pattern and the way your pronouncing things.


      1. Yeah, I never got the impression that Aubree was dumb, or unaware of what is going on around her, just the speech seems a bit garbled. It isn’t uncommon in little kids, and fairly easy to correct with early intervention. There are some moms who understand their kids perfectly, and refuse to acknowledge that there may be an issue, and I really hope that if there IS a problem they can tackle it early. It’s so much harder to fix if you wait.

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