‘Teen Mom 2’ Season 7B Episode 11 Recap: Battling with Barb & a Baby-Daddy Break-In

When you see your ex-husband creepin’ over your fence…

It’s once again time to check in with the crew from Teen Mom 2! It’s been a few weeks, but The Ashley can see right away that not much has changed since the last recap: Kail and Javi are still one small step away from mud-wrestling for custody of Lincoln (and/or the family Starbucks gold card),  while Jenelle is still singing “Gonna Get Jace Back,” that fine little ditty she’s been belting for the last seven years. (Sing along if you know it!)

Anyway, let’s get started before Jerry Springer does a Very Special Episode on Kail and Javi and The Ashley has to recap that too!

“Can’t a girl poop in peace without having to worry about her ex-husband breaking into her house?!”

The episode kicks off at Kail’s place. She is not happy. (I’ll give you a moment to recover from the shock of that statement. Can you imagine Kail not being happy?!)

She tells Producer J.C. that “Psycho” Javi came a’pounding on the basement door recently, breaking into the house while Kail was on the crapper.

AS.YOU.DO.

Kail says that Javi was getting all “Nancy Drew” up in the joint, going through her drawers and looking for clues that she had some dude living with her. (Hey Javi, forget the drawers, look in her womb!)

As always, Kail’s trusty pal Sterling was at the house, as were Lincoln and Isaac. Kail says she had to call up Jo and have him come get Isaac so that the kid didn’t pick up any breaking-and-entering habits from Javi.

Kail says that Javi refused to leave the house. (Maybe he was just looking for the copy of How to Not Get Screwed in Your Divorce Even if Your Wife is a Reality Star that Jeremy lent him a while back?) Because this is ‘Teen Mom 2,’ the police were called, but because Javi and Kail are still legally married, nothing could be done. (I guess that means there are no clips of Javi being hauled out in handcuffs screaming, “Why am I a guy?!” Sigh.)

“No funny, I was scared for my life!”

Just then, Sterling calls up to talk about how upset she was when Javi broke into the house like a Yeezy-wearing Kool-Aid man.

“I was legit, no funny, scared,” Sterling so eloquently tells Kail.

Kail says that she’s expecting Javi to apologize for his recent “psychopathic” actions.

“I’m just glad it’s not Adam’s douchy paws holding the other end of this clothesline!”

Meanwhile, it’s an important day for Chelsea, who, along with Cole and Aubree, is taking her “gender reveal” photos for Instagram. They recently found out that they are having a boy, They decide on two photos and we get to watch as they post the pics to their Instagram accounts.

This is riveting TV, folks.

Luckily we can always count on Leah to keep things interesting and somewhat trashy (both literally and figuratively.) It’s time for the ding-dang drop off, so Leah pulls off to the trusty turnout in the woods so that she can fetch an offspring from an ex-husband.

She picks up Addie, and chats with Jeremy about work, the weather and whatnot. Leah then brings up the fact that she doesn’t have nuthin’ to do during the day, once she throws a can of ravioli in each of the youngins’ lunch sacks and ships them off to school for learnin’.

“I know you like them school girls! Come and get it, Jeremy Lynn!”

She’s considering using that extra time to go back to school, and Jeremy is surprisingly supportive of her plan. (He’s surely happy to support any idea of Leah’s that he doesn’t have to pay for, and doesn’t involve him driving around in an SUV stacked to the ceiling with Mary Kay “Strawberry Frost” blush compacts.)

Leah is going to head over to the local beauty school to get more information. She says that she was always planning to go to college, but she kept finding babies in her gersh-dern tummy!

“I’m still paying off all that doggone Mary Kay ya bought!”

“If I hadn’t gotten pregnant I would have went to college,” Leah tells Jeremy.

If only there had been a way to prevent that!

Speaking of not preventing pregnancy, it’s now time to check in with Jenelle. She’s still mad at her mother, Barbara, and things between them are tense. Babs arrives to deposit Jace at Jenelle’s house for the weekend, and Jenelle tells us that she’s planning to be civil to her mom. Of course, though, we’re talking about Jenelle here so that could never happen.

Barb and Jace walk in (and, sadly, Babs doesn’t utter her trademark, “Oh hi, Juh-nelle” greeting). Pregnant Jenelle is plopped down on the couch and Barb tries to make small talk. She asks how the Spawn of Lurch is doing and Jenelle just totally ignores her.

“David no like Barbara. Barbara make Jenelle mad. David mad at Barbara.”

Later, Lurch and Jenelle talk about Babs’ visit. Jenelle insists that Barb should just give her Jace back, and then all of their issues will be solved. (I mean, remember how great Jenelle and Babs got along before Jace was born on 16 and Pregnant?! They were practically the Gilmore Girls! BFFs! It’s all Jace’s fault that they don’t get along, of course. It couldn’t be because Barb is controlling and Jenelle is an unstable, hissy-fit-throwing egomaniac that still acts like a teenager. Nope.)

Jenelle vows that she will never speak to Barb again if Barb is really insistent on fighting for Jace in court.

“I will completely cut her off and be completely distant!” Jenelle barks.

Um…is that a threat or a promise? Not having to deal with her bitch-of-a-daughta’s tantrums and creepy assorted soulmates lurking around probably sounds pretty good to poor Babs right about now!

“Hmm…how can I stay relevant on this show? I know, I’ll rent a creepy-ass doll to play with during my segments!”

Back in South Dakota, Chelsea literally has no story line. Since it looks like we’ll be forced to watch her binge-watching ‘Friends’ unless the producers come up with something, someone suggests that she get one of those weird “Baby Think It Over” dolls to teach Cole about newborns. (You know the dolls; they are the ones that Jenny Jones used to hand out to out-of-control 13-year-olds that would come on the show and proclaim that “Ain’t nobody gonna tell me I’m not old enough to have a baby!” Man, I miss Jenny Jones.)

The fake baby will cry and require the same care that a real child would, so Chelsea decides to rent one so that she and Cole can get used to having a baby around.

Sorry, but that thing scares the beJesus out of me.

“They have little wieners…and stuff,” Chelsea says of the fake babies.

Chelsea really doesn’t need a doll. She’s been putting up with someone that cries and has a little wiener for years! (Hey, Adam!)

Soon, Chelsea’s plastic bundle of joy arrives. They break open the box and reveal a horrifying realistic baby doll that looks like it’s ready to haunt your nightmares.

Shudder.

“She left me hanging! She took my kid, and I didn’t even have time to get that extra guac on my burrito!”

Over in Delaware, Javi and his assorted dudes are grabbing lunch and chatting about Javi’s new career as a prowler. Javi insists that he did nothing wrong– he was just trying to drop Lincoln off at Chipotle for Kail. Apparently he didn’t arrive fast enough, and Kail got angry and left Chipotle with Lincoln (and most likely a burrito bowl).

Javi says he was upset, so he decided to head over to the house to pick up Lincoln. After scampering over the fence (as you do), Javi realized that the basement door was open, so he entered through there and headed upstairs. That’s when he says he encountered a very angry Kail, fresh off the toilet. After she called the cops, Javi says that the cops told Kail she couldn’t kick Javi out because it’s still technically his house too.

(Um…why didn’t Javi just knock on the door like a normal person, rather than prowling around and jumping fences like the Pink Panther?)

When you’re trying to figure out why all your friends speak like they’re writing tweets for Twitter…

Javi explains that, since he was already in the house, he decided to stroll around and see what kind of a housekeeper Kail has been since Javi moved out. He claims that there are clothes, crap (and possibly gentlemen callers) all over the place.

“I was like, ‘What happened to this place? When I was here this was a dope ass crib!’ Javi says. “Now it’s garbage!”

Javi says that, even though he and Kail are in a bad place, he is still able to see Isaac, which is good.

Over in The WV, Leah’s busy fixin’ up a big ol’ pot of canned soup for the girlseses. (She’s even heating it up this time!) She then calls over all the youngins because it’s readin’ time! Now, Leah may have attended one of those “not well” West Virginia schools, but even she knows the importance of “learning” the kids how to read.

“Mama’s gonna make the whole ding-dang neighborhood look like they just had them Glamour Shots taken!”

The next day is a very special day for Leah. She’s taking Addie over to the nearby beauty school so that she can see “what all” is required for her to sign up. Leah had previously been taking classes at the school, but had dropped out to pursue her dreams of becoming a Mary Kay dealer.

Leah says she wants to make all girls feel beautiful inside and out. (Come on now, girl, we know you literally stole that phrase off of your Mary Kay marketing brochures!)

Addie could give two craps about her Mama providing beauty and whatnot. She demands lipstick, donuts, pizza and the opportunity to pee (but not necessarily in that order) while in the car on the way to the beauty school.

When you’re trying to figure out which kid is yours…

Meanwhile in North Carolina, Jenelle and Lurch (and their assorted kids) head to watch Jace do Jujitsu. Jenelle is giving Jace a bunch of instructions trying to pretend that she is 1)the Dragon Master of Jujitsu and 2) not watching the kid do this for the very first time since 2013.

We watch as Jace literally drags what looks like a lifeless, bloated corpse-of-a-kid across the room and proudly tells Jenelle that he “beat all” of the other kiddies.

Um…?!?!?

He must have learned that one from his Mama!

Later, it’s time for all of Jenelle’s offspring to be exchanged. Kaiser must go to Nathan‘s and Barb is picking up Jace. (I wonder if Jenelle has concocted some sort of Venn diagram to keep all of the custody shifting straight?)

Before they leave to trade kids, though, Jenelle & Co. sit down to gnaw some pizza. Naturally, no meal of Jenelle’s would be complete without her talking crap on one of her many ex-fiances, so Jenelle gets straight to it, bashing Nathan, even though Jace and Kaiser are sitting right there.

Nathan texts Jenelle to see if she knows any “good gyms” in her area because he’s looking for a change of scenery and would like to pump iron closer to Jenelle and then pick up Kaiser. Lurch refuses to allow Nathan into “their” house, and insists that Jenelle meet up with her meatbag-of-an-ex-fiance somewhere else.

“This is not gonna end well.”

Just then, Babs calls up Jenelle, who explains what Nathan said about picking up Kaiser. Barb assumes that she’s going to have to drive all the way to where Jenelle lives to collect Jace. (To be fair, Babs did kind of jump all over Jenelle without letting her finish her sentence. And, yes, it pains The Ashley to stick up for Jenelle.)

Within two seconds though, Jenelle is screaming into the phone, telling her mother that she never said that. Babs insists that she can’t hear what Jenelle said very well. (Hey, those Jitterbug phones aren’t all that great! Give the poor lady a break, Jenelle!)

Jenelle is soon gesturing wildly and screaming, all while breaking up her sentences into shortened bits to further demonstrate her point.

Um…why is Kaiser excommunicated from the family dinner?

“NATHAN.IS COMING.TO.WILMINGTON!” Jenelle bellows into the phone, while Jace just sits there, trying to enjoy his slice of Meat Lovers in peace.

“NATHAN. IS GOING. TO THE GYM!’ she screams.

Well, now that we’ve established that Nathan will, indeed, be working on his fitness, I feel better.

Jace is looking more and more bothered by the interaction between Jenelle and Babs. He gets even more uncomfortable when Jenelle brings up Babs giving Jace back to her.

“Just give me Jack…er…I mean John, I mean…that kid, back and then I’ll have the perfect family, dude!”

“If you gave Jace back to me in the first place, we wouldn’t have to meet up like this!” Jenelle screams into the phone.

Oh, by all means, give the kid permanent residence at Jenelle’s Crazy Castle, where there’s always a random soulmate lurking in the moat, and Queen Jenelle is screaming “Off with their heads” toward any ex-fiance and/or family member who doesn’t give her her way.

Jenelle cusses into the phone and says that she’s tired of doing everything “Barbara’s way.”

My face when Jenelle starts talking about wiping her ass…

“Do you want me to wipe my ass the same way Barbara does too?” Jenelle asks.

Um, thanks for that, Jenelle. Just thanks. Now I’m going to have the image of you wiping yourself (to the tune of Ke$ha’s “Tik Tok”) in my head for the foreseeable future.

Meanwhile, David is standing in the kitchen with a stupid look on his face, popping protein pills and surely practicing “filling the streets with uppercuts” just in case Jenelle’s fight with Barb turns physical and she needs him to finish off the old lady.

That awkward moment when…you realize the episodes are edited terribly out of sequence and Cole is already wearing his wedding band, even though he’s not supposed to be married yet…

In South Dakota, Chelsea and Cole are taking care of their plastic baby. The baby is screaming, and apparently it even poops its diaper. (The Ashley still can’t stop picturing Jenelle wiping so any mention of going to the bathroom is kind of horrifying.)

The baby won’t stop screaming, and Chelsea and Cole are trying to figure out what to do to get the kid to be quiet. Two hours later, though, the baby is still crying. Cole finally rocks the creature to sleep but soon it’s crying again. Cole says that he’s glad to have gotten the practice before the real baby comes.

Even Vivi’s like, “Mmmm-hmmmm….”

Meanwhile in Delaware, Kail heads over to Jo and Vee‘s house to talk crap on Javi. Vee is sitting there with her daughter (who looks exactly like Isaac did as a baby, by the way), and asks Kail how things are between her and Javi. When Kail brings up the fact that she and Jo get along so well, Vee decides to be a bit spicy and remind Kail that for the first five or so years of Isaac’s life, Kail basically treated Jo like the stuff Jenelle is wiping from her butt.

Kail tells them about Javi’s “break-in,” and Jo is angered that it scared Isaac. Vee tells them that they’re all overreacting, and they shouldn’t treat Javi like he was some random dude that was breaking in to steal the family jewels (which are, of course, just a stack of Drake CDs and a gift certificate for Dr. Miami).

“He’s going through a divorce!” Vee reminds them of Javi. “You’re dealing with a heartbroken-ass dude.”

“Bitches be crazy!”

Kail reminds Vee that she and Javi were awful together, and Jo cuts off the conversation. He doesn’t care who’s mad at who, or who is heartbroken and who isn’t; all he wants is for Isaac to not be there to witness Kail and Javi’s “Tom and Jerry”-esque shenanigans.

Kail encourages Jo to tell Javi that he can’t see Isaac anymore, in hopes that it will “get through to him” and stop his odd behavior.  Jo agrees, while Vee just sits there with a look on her face that says, “Giiiiiirl, you savage!

After Kail leaves, Vee announces that this is Kail’s karma for treating Jo so poorly for so many years. (I mean, must we bring up SweatpantsGate!? #NeverForget)

“We can’t have you cuttin’ and permin’ until you finish up yer learnin’!”

Meanwhile, Leah is at the beauty school. She meets with Catherine, the school’s owner, who may or may not be a Roseanne Barr impersonator in her spare time. (Not the 1980s Roseanne; the one from the late 1990s episodes after she had a bunch of plastic surgery and the show got all weird.)

Addie is afraid to go near Catherine, and it’s no surprise. Catherine’s face is shellacked with so much makeup that she literally looks like she’s wearing a mask. She is exactly the person I’d picture who would be running a beauty school in West Virginia that’s located next door to a Big K-Mart.

“That’s longer than like four flights to Hawaii! I reckon I’m gonna be in school forever!”

Leah tells Catherine that she wants to come back to school because she’s ready to have some ME TIME. Catherine informs her that, in order to complete the program, Leah will have to do 1,800 hours of schooling. Leah looks shocked. (That’s basically the equivalent to the time she spent being married to Corey, give or take an hour or two.)

“How many months is that?” Leah asks, with a bewildered look on her face. (She ain’t so good at the addin’ and whatnot.)

“And don’t think you’re gonna get no free ride just ’cause you’re on a TV show. I saw what ya did at that tanning salon!”

Catherine informs Leah that it would be a little over a year, going Tuesday to Saturday. Leah realizes that she has the youngins Thursdays to Sundays, so that may cause a bit of a time-jumble.

Leah realizes that her dream of beautifying West Virginia, one bleached-out perm at a time, is going to be a lot harder to achieve than she thought.

In North Carolina, it’s time for the kid exchange. Jenelle doesn’t want to see Nathan or her mother, so she sends Lurch out to switch out the kids. He gives Kaiser to Nathan, and then they go hunting for Barb. She arrives, and Lurch once again is charged with exchanging the offspring.

“Yes, hi, I’m wondering if you had any businesswoman specials? I’m trying to make my mom think I’m important!”

Babs is happy to see that Jace is still in one piece, but she’s not happy to see that Jenelle is hiding in the car so that she doesn’t have to talk to her “motha.” Lurch explains that Jenelle is in the middle of doing some very important “emails” and can’t be bothered.

“She’s tryin’ to type a bunch of stuff up,” Lurch bumbles.

Barb isn’t buying it. She looks over and see Jenelle trying her best to look like she’s very busy typing on her phone. Barb decides that if Jenelle likes “the emails” so much, she’ll just go ahead and email her the link to Jace’s Popcorn “Fundraisa” (whatever the hell that is).

“People [i.e. ‘Teen Mom 2’ fans] could buy popcorn frin all ova tha country, and he can win a huge prize!” Barb exclaims.

Raise your hand if you’re tired of Jenelle acting like a five-year-old in every episode…

Maybe if Jace’s “motha” could work the Popcorn Fundraiser onto her Instagram account (in between her ads for Fit Tea and those creepy waist trainers), Jace could be the Number One Popcorn Seller of all time!

Jenelle, still in the car, calls up Lurch, who’s literally standing just a few feet away from her. She’s angry that Barb has been given camera time.

“Now you’re giving her a whole episode!” Jenelle screams at Lurch. “So thanks!”

Barb protests, claiming she simply wants to spread the word about the Popcorn Fundraisa!

IT’S ALL ABOUT THE POPCORN, GUYS!

Lurch doesn’t like the idea of his meal ticket being upset with him, so he sulks over to the car to talk to Jenelle. Barb, too, charges over to the car, determined to tell Jenelle about Jace’s popcorn. (She’s nothing if not determined!) Jenelle is angry, and tells the producers that she’s not filming with Barb anymore.

Perfect! Does that mean we don’t have to watch Jenelle anymore, and all the segments can just be about BABS! BABS! BABS!? #DreamComeTrue

Back away from the camera, Jenelle…and also the eyebrow pencil…

Producer Kristen comes scurrying over, and asks Jenelle if she wants them to stop filming. Jenelle screams that she doesn’t want to film with her mother ever, ever again.

NOT EVER! NOT EVER IN HER ENTIRE LIFE!

Babs is ever-persistant, though.

“I wanna just tell ya about the popcorn!” she cackles as she approaches Jenelle in the car.

After Jenelle screams again, Barb says that Jenelle may have just earned herself limited custody with Jace.

“It’s like ya don’t even care about tha popcorn!”

“No one should be nice to my mom!” Jenelle screams as she takes out 100 cameras from her car.

Later, Barb tells Producer Kristen that she wishes she could give Jenelle her son back, but that Jenelle is not ready to raise him (and all the other kids she keeps shooting out).

“Grow the hell up, Jenelle,” she said. “I don’t want to hear her bulls**t anymore. It’s taking eight years to get your frickin’ life togetha for him! And now ya mad at me?”

Babs says that she’s spent so much time and money, and sacrificed so much for Jace, and Jenelle treats her so badly. Jace hugs his crying grandma, and tries to comfort her. It’s a sweet moment.

“No I don’t want to see your new Crossfit-themed ski mask you got for prowling purposes!”

In Delaware, Javi is refusing to allow Kail to pick up Lincoln. She’s sitting in his driveway and Javi is demanding that Kail get off his property. Javi is also upset that Isaac is no longer allowed to be alone with him.

“Jo and I don’t want Isaac with Javi alone,” Kail tells a producer.

Javi comes strolling out of the house, and wants to know why he’s no longer allowed to be with Isaac. Kail explains that it was his prowling ways that made her come to this conclusion, but Javi is not buying it.

“You weren’t saying that last week when you wanted to go party!” Javi tells Kail.

Ooh. IN.THE.FACE.

“If I only want to give people crunchy curl perms, maybe they’ll let me finish in half the time?”

Finally, we check in one last time with Leah. She’s still reeling over the fact that the beauty school lady is really going to make her go to school for a whole ding-dang year. (I mean, did she tell them she’s on a reality show? Maybe they can give her one of them honorary degrees the colleges give celebrities sometimes?)

She tells the kids that she visited a school, and that she’s thinking about getting her learnin’ on! The girls encourage Leah to go to school (except for Aleeah, for legit tells her mom she doesn’t care what the hell she does). Leah is trying to talk to the girls about her school plans, but they don’t want to listen, and aren’t being very good filming partners. They just want to play on the gersh-dern swings!

Where the hell is Chasity when you need her!? She is always there to provide a glazed look and a poorly-worded piece of advice!

That’s all for this episode. Next week,Chelsea and Cole get married, while Leah gets Chasity to film again so that she can talk to her about her school plans!

To read The Ashley’s other ‘Teen Mom 2’ recaps, click here!

(Photos: MTV)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

69 Comments

  1. Can we please take a moment to talk about jo and vee’s daughter’s name? I assume it is pronounced “Vee Vee?” So “Vee” named her daughter “Vee Vee?” Wtf is that about?? It’s weird enough that Leah has a kid named Aleah, but Vee and Vivi is a whole different level of weird!


  2. Kail seems to be sliding off the deep end. I am guessing her life is out of control at this point which is why most folks act like a petty psycho like she is doing. Javi is no gold medalist in terms of parenting, but Kail is doing a tremendous disservice to everyone else involved acting the way she does.
    Perhaps this whole saga will be the inspiration for a face tattoo that covers it in something attractive.

    Leah, ya may want to practice heating up soup as hot wax won’t dump out of the can cold 😉

    Ugh. I can only say I feel bad for Janelle’s kids. Let’s hope the state keeps a close eye on all of that hot mess.


  3. You can tell Vee’s fuse is getting short with all of this. Kail keeps leaning on Jo for emotional support, which I don’t agree with for a few reasons.This is all Kail’s doing and I do not feel sorry for her one bit! Can’t wait to see how things pan out with baby daddy #3. She struggled with Jo, now Javi….anyone else see the common denominator? Yeah, it’s her! She is the reason that coparenting is such a struggle. She’s just a mean person. Like last night when she couldn’t even put Lincoln’s clothes in a bag? Be the bigger person like you say you are and start treating people with respect! How would she feel if he did the same to her??


  4. MTV needs to put their foot down about filming because these girls are getting ridiculous. None of these girls think they should have to film when that’s exactly why they’re being paid?!

    Kailyn needs to be told that she’s not a celebrity and has no right to be a diva. She’s so selfish it’s sickening. Everything is about HER happiness. She’s ruining her kid’s lives and causing a wedge in Jo and Vee’s relationship. Jo needs to grow a pair and listen to Vee before he loses her completely.

    Jenelle needs to leave Jace where he is and learn to treat her mother with respect. No doubt that Ensley will treat Jenelle exactly the way she treats Babs when she’s old enough to talk. If Jenelle doesn’t want to film, cut her, not Babs.

    Leah is positively skeletal and high on EVERY episode, but we’re all expected not to notice?

    Chelsea needs to leave the show completely because she’s so boring and annoying. The most interesting thing about her storyline is that she’s so lazy that she can’t even be bothered to shower, fix her hair, or keep her house tidy enough to film anywhere but on her couch or in her kitchen. She’s so focused on her “privacy” now that MTV is literally reusing footage from one week to the next expecting us not to notice.


    1. OMG Yes! i agree with everything you said, its like Leah hasn’t been quite right since her drug addiction ordeal. She’s ridiculously skinny and it seems like she struggles with maintaining any train of thought. I never thought any teen mom would make me as physically sick as Farrah but holy shit was i wrong… Kailyn (however the hell you spell her name) has become the most disgusting woman on television. Its sad how those who deserve nothing get EVERYTHING. She was taken care of by Jo and his family then she ditched him, then met Javi and got hew houses, cars, health insurance and hefty MTV checks and now shes kicked his ass to the curb too. i just cant with her anymore. Vee should slap some sense into her, tell her to get her shit together and maybe get some therapy. she is one damaged person.


  5. To be fair, I don’t think Jenelle even knows what a Venn diagram is.

    Also, I MISS JENNY JONES SO MUCH! Rude Jude was my dude lol

    I think I hate Kail worse than Farrah. No one is as bad as Jenelle, but Kail is closing in to a solid 2nd place train wreck of a human being. What a trashy low down dirty piece of shit. She is your typical millennial “mom” uses her kids as pawns and accessories, same with the men in her life. Both Jo and Javi are good men and they got stuck with this nasty bitch for life. Here’s hoping Javi finds a girl as awesome (and HONEST) as Vee! Can she have her own segment? Because she is savage and I love it.


  6. HO-LY SHEEET!! Wow.
    Get jenulkie away from Jace, stat.
    The way she plants him in front of a screen, hides in her bdrm when he’s there & has violent screaming fits around him & TALKS abt him like he’s not even there is the makings of a felon. Not only should she NOT have custody…but she should not be allowed to even see him. Goodness, this poor innocent child. I hope Barbara fights with whatever she’s got (for him) because she is the only one that cares. She sees how dumb & inexperienced her daughter is. All these guys…Jace is not their biological son. That alone puts him at risk for abuse. Poor boy. Grandma – fight!!


  7. Everyone knows that she(Jenelle) is not consistent mentally, but where are her physical problems? it was such a drama ?? and whoop> Tadaaaah > gone?!


  8. A TM2 recap to start the weekend, it’s like Christmas!!!! I couldn’t stop laughing the entire time! Thank you thank you thank you!!! Once again I feel so bad for Jace, he’s always caught in the middle. I also give Vee props for being sassy!!!


  9. I agree that Javi shouldn’t have come into the house the way he did. However it is still his house and I’m glad the police told her as much.


    1. That doesn’t mean it’s ok. A similar incident happened with my cousin had a similar incident happen when she was going through a divorce. Her ex-husband broke into the house and tried to steal from them after they separated and he moved out and in with another girl. She called the cops and they didn’t do anything since they were still legally married.


  10. My heart broke for Jace in this episode. The situation is so sad, and either way he loses. If his mother doesn’t fight for him, he will grow up wondering why she had two other kids and never tried for him. If his mother does fight for him, he gets ripped from the only home he’s ever known. Both parties here are wrong. If Jenelle and Barbra did what was in the best interests of Jace; Jenelle would have moved much closer and Barbra would agree to modified joint custody. They could have an agreement similar to Corey and Leah’s, where Jace spends time at both homes without being put through a battle such as the one going on right now. He could stay in the same school and spend equal time with both Barbra and Jenelle. I don’t understand what is so difficult about that.


    1. Jenelle…Jenelle is the ONLY thing that makes this concept difficult. Barb may not be the greatest person in the world, but she is a damn good mom for Jace. Jenelle has never really wanted him, and still doesn’t. She only wants what she can’t have. If she had even an inkling of mothering instinct or love for her son, she’d do better. She chooses not to, which tells everyone that she will never be a fit mother. Have you ever watched someone go down the road Jenelle has, firsthand, and slowly destroy her child(ren)? I have. I watched my own sister do it. I feel for Barb in more ways than I can possibly articulate, because of the simple fact that she stepped up. She loves Jace, regardless of her imperfections as a human being and her shitty relationship with her daughter, she absolutely loves that boy with every fiber of her being. Why should she have to compromise Jace’s health and well being to appease Jenelle if it is not in Jace’s best interest? I feel the same way about Jenelle as I do my own sister, and my own mother, who is now raising my sister’s children. A mother who is far past her prime child rearing years, but does an amazing job.
      Barb should *absolutely* use visitation with Jace as a means to teach Jenelle to get her damn act together. She’s not using Jace as a weapon, but rather the control that Jenelle wants, and that’s a powerful weapon. Jenelle doesn’t want Jace, she wants control, and she can’t have it(nor should she, EVER!!). Barb should absolutely NOT agree to modified custody of that boy. It is not safe for him, at all, it is not in his nest interest, it is not healthy for him. As much as I don’t(and would never) condone some of Barbs own actions and words, she is, without a doubt, 100% in the right here. Jenelle is damn lucky that she agrees to any visitation. Personally, I don’t think she deserves to see Jace, and I don’t think Jace deserves to be put through that kind of hell.
      Trust me, I am slowly watching this happen to two beautiful little girls, just as I have watched it happen for years before the justice system finally helped my own mother get those beautiful little girls away from a shitty situation. It is horrifying to watch, and it has taken over a YEAR for my nieces to finally start acting like relatively well off little kids again. They used to be so quiet, yet at the same time irrational, emotional, easily angered, acting out, etc..They had health issues, all directly related to their stressful life…Who in their right mind wants to see a child go through that? You are absolutely insane if you think Jenelle deserves ANY kind of visitation. Until she gets her shit together, and really does it,f or an extended period of time, I don’t personally think she should ever see Jace. The only reason barb allows her to, is because she thinks Jace needs it. Sadly, I believe Barb is mistaken and while it might be painful to take a child completely away from his own mother, sometimes, it is the best decision. I can’t even begin to tell you how hard it was for my own mom to do it. But I can tell you, my nieces are grateful for it, now, and they’re much better off too.


      1. Yes! I have the same exact situation and it would devastate my niece to be back with her mother..7 years later. She barely knows her. My mom and I would be too!

        The thing that gets me the most is jenelle has no reason to be living so far away from Jace. If she lived closer she could have been helping out with him all the time and made the transistion. It blows my mind how selfish she is, expecting Jace to leave his life behind like that. It’s not like jenelle has a job or any reason whatsoever to keep her that far away from him. She’s so delusional and selfish.


        1. Agree, at least with respect to the last part. No reason in the world for her to move 85 times and then choose to build a home a buy land so far away.


  11. Jenelle is so delusional. I do believe that Babs had every intention of handing over Jace once Jenelle got her ish together, but I don’t think Babs thought it was going to take Jenelle 8 YEARS. Jenelle absolutely should not have Jace, but she’s too selfish to realize that . Jace has a routine now and a home, and Jenelle can’t just rip him away from it NOW because she “got her life together” almost a decade later….and I still don’t think that she realizes how much dysfunction surrounds her. I just hope that the courts side with Barb.


    1. If the courts do end up siding with Jenelle, Babs and Jace will be devastated. I can’t imagine spending 8 years caring for the person who needed you the most to have it all ripped away because the person who is supposed to have him faked it well enough. On the flip side, I can’t imagine being cared for by someone your entire life and being tucked into bed and held while sick then be told the person who constantly yells and screams about taking care of you will be your new caregiver.


  12. I wonder if the other parents at Jace’s Boy Scout meetings and Karate lessons recognize Jenelle from the show and wonder why the fuck she’s even there.


  13. I think it’s important to show Chelsea so that young people see what a stable family and a loving, respectful partner looks like. And Javi has had previous scenes where he was sulky, paranoid, immature and controlling. Kail did well to stick around when he was so negative and nasty to her.


    1. Vee deserves a reward period. She seems to be the only cast member that really grew up and does not only not start drama, she tries to stop it too.


    2. EVERYTHING she said on that episode was on point!…and Kail didn’t want to hear any of it. That’s the problem with these girls….they always want someone to cottle them and never want to hear the truth.


  14. Next season on TM…

    Jenelle: ‘I really can’t go to jail in August. I have tickets for an Alice in Wonderland fair. See, that why I’ve got these red curls in my hair and red lipstick on.
    This is what I wake up with every single day, trying to be like the red queen.
    I’m even barking orders like ‘Nobody should be nice to Babs!’ and such.
    Everyone knows this, The Ashley wrote about my goal in in March ;-).


  15. I hate Barbara. That woman is cold and manipulative. Anytime Jenelle doesn’t do what she wants she throws not allowing her to see Jace in her face. If any of the moms did that to the dads everyone would jump on them saying how they don’t act in the best interest of the child and yet everyone applauds her. Barbara does not act in Jace’s best interest. She promised to give Jenelle Jace back after Kaiser was born saying she needed to get a different house etc. That they didn’t need to go to court. She hasn’t kept her word she just keeps coming up with excuses as to why she can’t have him back. I am glad Jenelle is finally pursing this through the courts so she can get an actual answer about if/when/how she can have custody. It has gone on way too long. Barbara is scared that she will be cut out of their lives if Jenelle gets custody and she should be for how she has treated Jenelle and tried to alienate Jace from her.


    1. I’m sorry, but no. Jenelle neglected her child from the day she brought him home from the hospital & she was lucky to have a mother to step in & raise her child. Jenelle went downhill from there & fast, she was in no position to raise her child or be given the privilege to have him back. She hit rock bottom so many times that she can’t be trusted not to crash & burn again. Barbara may be a lot of things, but first & foremost, she is the woman that kept Jace out of foster care & took on the responsibility of raising him as her own so he would have a safe, loving home while Jenelle shot up in between mug shots & marriages. She has only herself to blame, maybe people would feel more inclined to help her if she didn’t verbally (or physically) assault them? Homegirl has A LOT to learn, gratitude & the English language would be a great start. She better lie in that bed of hers, she spent a long time making it.


    2. Babs ain’t sweet or perfect but she sure is a better parent for Jace.
      Babs never promised anything. She said ‘we’ll see’ and told what would make her feel better as she had concerns about Jace’s well being.
      But now there is this unhealthy relationship between Jenelle and David, Jenelle and Babs, Jenelle and every ex/ baby daddy/ babysitter/ BFF and Jenelle and Jace. You see the pattern?

      Sorry to drop all over your little violin but unlike some people, I do really care about a child’s emotional well being.
      That being said. Babs should keep Jace out of these brawls. She should take him out of the bad situation when Jenelle is creating drama and fights.


    3. Have you thought that Barbara withholding jace is because she can see how controlling and manipulative David is? How Jenelle is supporting another dead beat and how jace slips through the cracks when Jenelle is with him?
      WAKE UP! Babs is the ONLY ONE in Jaces corner


    4. Babs has done nothing but try to protect Jace from the revolving door of crazy that leads into Jenelle’s life. She isn’t perfect, no. But she has always acted in Jace’s best interests, keeping him from being bounced back and forth between her and whatever soulmate Jenelle is living with this week. She has provided a stability that Jace’s totally irresponsible mother has no inclination to do. Jenelle cares only for herself. Babs may have promised to give Jace back when Jenelle go her Schmidt together, but the bottom line is that Jenelle hasn’t gotten herself anywhere close to being able to take care of a child who is now old enough to understand the comings and goings of the various men in her life. She’s had 8 years to make something is her life. She’s done nothing. She will do nothing.


    5. Um no. Barb is the only one who has ever stepped up for Jace. The only one. Jenelle does not have her life together and anyone who thinks she does is delusional. She has no job. She got a medical assistant certificate, which pays low wages. But she can’t even get a job in that field because of her record and drug abuse. She chose to get pregnant with Kaiser and Ensley despite the fact that she didn’t have Jace back yet. She’s had multiple failed and toxic relationships. Barb has had very valid concerns about both Nathan (we see how that “stable” home turned out) and David. Jace has never been Jenelle’s priority. Not once. You can see how nervous and scared that poor little boy is around her. Jenelle hadn’t seen him in at least a week and didn’t even hug or kiss him hello. What kind of mom doesn’t greet her small child lovingly after a week apart? Barb was so happy to have Jace back and Jenelle just sees him as a possession to be won. A pawn in her never ending battle with Barb. Jace has a mom and it’s not Jenelle. Barb doesn’t have to alienate Jenelle. She does that all on her own.


    6. She’s very lucky that Jace is with his meme and wasn’t put in foster care, where she’d have 0 chance of getting him back. Regardless of Babs’ & Jenelle’s relationship, Babs should be up for sainthood for her stepping up for Jace alone. Everyone has a limit. Babs’ limit with Jenelle was probably like 12 years ago, but she still contacts her and lets her see Jace. She has put A LOT aside to keep Jace in Jenelle’s life. You can’t force a deadbeat parent to change her spring break plans to see her kid. She’s the female Adam–always saying that it’s someone else’s fault that she never sees Jace, yet we see her, on camera, saying she missed 3 weekends in a row because of her own “work.”


    7. Seriously, she really needs to take the other two kids from her. She’s in no way a good mom to these kids. The fact she keeps spitting them out by rando bums, great environment for kids. Physically attacking people, she wins mom of the year.


    8. I know I’m going to get a lot of down votes for this but Whatev I agree 100% that barb is cold and manipulative! How much more proof do you people need???? The second barb got pissed off at jenelle for refusing to talk to her, she immediately threw down the “control over jace” card and threatened her with limited visitation. Now I’m not saying jenelle isn’t a sorry excuse for a parent, but neither is barb! She just looooves to dangle that custody carrot over jenelles head every chance she gets! It’s the 1 card that she has to play and I’m tellin ya… ITS OVER PLAYED!!!!


      1. She really should just stop letting Janelle have any visitation whatsoever, and be done with the bullshit games. They both seem to thrive on the conflict to some extent, and they really need to just cut all ties. Janelle is a useless POS, and always will be since she is incapable of recognizing her own faults, taking responsibility for her actions, and the resulting consequences.


  16. LL cool Javi – I need love
    lyrics.

    (…)
    But where you at you’re neither here or there
    I swear I can’t find you anywhere
    Damn sure you ain’t in my (EX WIVES) closet, or under my rug
    this love search is really making me bug.

    I need love
    I need love

    (Original lyrics: LL cool J – I need love)

    His audition tape for ‘Are you the one’ was a very clear LL cool J refence. Not very original Javi and don’t say thing you don’t mean. What you are looking for ain’t love.


  17. Oh, for fuck’s sake, Jenelle is exhausting. Am I the only one who sees her obvious daddy/abandonment issues? Always needing a man to run her life & people taking care of her responsibilities for her while whining how nothing ever goes her way. If she isn’t the eternal blame-shifting victim, idk who is. Her scenes stress me out & despite her relationship with Babs, I can’t deal with anyone treating their mother like trash. ‘Fame’ was the worst thing to happen to this idiot, I swear. Side note & I’m saying this as a genuine concern, I worry that Jenelle & Nathan’s lack of involvement with Kaiser is seriously delaying his development, children need constant mental stimulation, that poor boy gets none, tragic really. On the bright side, seeing these trainwrecks reproduce makes me never want to have kids, so kudos to MTV I guess. I’ll be doubling up on my birth control, stat.


  18. Ugh, Kailyn is a horrendous human being but Javi really doesn’t do himself any favours here at all. How does he think jumping over a wall to get into someone’s house is EVER going to be viewed as anything other than completely batshit, no matter what the motivations behind it?

    I never thought I would be praising Jo and Vee as the only example of decent parents in this particular shitshow, but they are. Poor Isaac, he’s the victim in all this. It literally breaks my heart every time we see/hear him cry over their fighting. The poor kid is 100% going to be traumatised for life because of this.


  19. Oh Jenelle, you are a hot mess. Maybe instead of screaming at the woman who gave you life, and um, RAISED YOUR SON, you could prove to everyone that you are a competent mother by taking care of Kaiser! I swear we see David caring for Kaiser far more often than Jenelle. Feed him nutritious meals, read to him, talk to him, do SOMETHING that leads everyone watching to believe you care about this poor baby’s well-being, and then you might stand to win custody of Jace. I just feel like one day Kaiser is going to watch these episodes and have his fears confirmed that his mother doesn’t love him. It absolutely breaks my heart. Please stop behaving as if Jace is worthy of more love and attention than his siblings.

    And while we are discussing this shit show of a life, Jenelle, hon, taking Jace on a vacation or to his martial arts class are tasks Jace probably won’t remember when he is in his 20’s, but I would image that he will remember all the times he was at your house and you were back in a locked bedroom, leaving young children to fend for themselves. Kids won’t remember everything about their childhood but they definitely remember the times they felt loved (or unloved) by their parents. And this is coming from someone with a legit, documented chronic illness. I very much have days when I can’t get out of bed, but universally when it comes to chronic health problems, stress makes your symptoms so much worse. I still am in shock over that episode a while back when Barbara asked Jenelle to make room in her schedule to take Jace to a scout party but Jenelle refused to cancel her spring break trip (and I think you only should be going on a spring break trip if you are in school), buy two seconds later started all that bull shit about her symptoms and not being “nourished” (can someone please give this girl a dictionary? She doesn’t know jack shit about the English language) by her own mother. I actually wanted to throw my remote at a wall. Thanks for making doctors less likely to believe those of us with real health issues by taking their time with your imaginary symptoms.

    Wow, apparently I had a lot of rage toward Jenelle. I believe Barbara said it best in this episode–grow the hell up. It’s time to be the adult you claim.


  20. Oh her God, dude. She doesn’t want to hear about her son’s activities so she can participate in his life! She just wants that bitch to give her son back and she ain’t about to be an involved parent until that point! DUDE. HOW.DO.YOU.NOT.UNDERSTAND.THAT.

    And seriously – I wasn’t in the room but I could hear that conversation between Chelsea and Cole and I actually thought he was talking to Aubrey. Am I the only one that is annoyed and completely over Chelsea’s baby talk? And when she was shrieking “I’m so scared” when NightmareBaby was screaming. Lord – I can’t wait for her to go through puberty so her voice deepens.


  21. -Kail and Javi are both crazy. Kail is a BITCH and Javi is a “hurt ass dude”…..this explains why she filed that PFA or restraining order or whatever it was on him….now she can keep him outta the house….and him acting like a man scorned gave her the ammo to build her case against him. You see how back in the day Leah tried to say Corey was awful, but he held his composure, didn’t pop up at her house uninvited, and let Leah make a fool outta herself? Corey came out the more stable human being, because he knew all along Leah wasn’t well, so he just gave her the rope and she hung herself. That’s what Javi needs to do. He needs to fully let Kail go and work on himself, because everyone knows she’s not worth it and it’s only a matter of time before her karma sets in


    1. I agree with everything you’ve said except in regard to Javi being “hurt a**”. Javi has a legitimate reason to feel hurt, and his emotional pain shouldn’t be invalidated. Kail ran over his heart with a Mac truck, giggling all the way. The girl is a callous, wannabe wrestler. Why he was ever with her astounds me still.


  22. Leah desperately needs a job and an education. It would do wonders for her. Sadly, I doubt she will because it’s easier for her to make excuses.


  23. Jenelle is like the female Adam. Mad at the person raising their kid..because they suck and were never there.

    Jenelle is such trash. That was so Unecessary, Babs just wanted to talk about THA POPCOHN


  24. Ashley, Deta Burke from Designing Women not Roseanne. ??
    Who the hell would pay money to look like Delta Burke?? Shouldn’t they put someone in the front office, idk, who has a style from the new millennium?


  25. I like Chelsea but if she hasn’t got a story line anymore shouldn’t she move on and have the privacy she has always wanted? I mean how much longer can she and MTV drag out normality?


    1. Her segments are all staged – she chooses not to show any “real” parts of her life. If anything is going on, the cameras are not allowed to be there and events are “re-created”. I don’t really think it’s fair because everyone always says that all the other girls are a mess and Chelsea is perfect, but I think she’s just very, very careful about what is filmed. I am sure she has a lot going on in her life; she should share more with her fans or just get off the show.


  26. Loved this recap, especially the Romy and Michelle reference. The recaps help me get through my work day. Thanks for your hilarious writing skills!


  27. While MTV does do a crap editing job with editing I don’t think they screwed up with Cole wearing his wedding ring because as soon as it was delivered to their house he asked Chelsea if he could go ahead and wear it now and he’s worn it since. I only remember this because they did a whole baby talk conversation and it seriously sounded like two eight year olds that “got married” because they exchanged ring pops.


    1. One thing I noticed is that when they showed Kail driving at the end it was from a scene last week when she was wearing that black sweater and not that strange get up at Jo’s house. Bad editing lol


  28. Sort of off topic but I finally got around to watching the “Being Debra” special. The entire episode I was cringing. It felt like they were making the episode with the sole purpose of making her look crazier than we already thought she was. And at the end her business partner was actually laughing at her “rapping.” I’m shocked to say this but Farrah made the right decision to not be in the music video.

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