It’s the penultimate episode of Big Brother 19. The Final 3—Josh, Christmas and Paul— celebrate and reflect, giving us a clip show. But the good news is that all of the clips are things we didn’t get to see.
There are new showmances (Christmas and Paul!) and new fights (Kevin going off on Alex, Matt and Raven). And, if you didn’t already love Cody, you will now because we get to see him be portrayed as the hero, and a sweet, loving dad.
There’s also a rat (literal), a snake (metaphoric) and Kevin possibly being in the mob.
You know, the usual ‘Big Brother’ stuff…
And we see the start of Part 1 of the final HoH competition, and it features unicorn farts.
No, seriously, there are unicorns that fart colored dust and glitter.
Again, the usual ‘Big Brother’ stuff…
Paul, Josh and Christmas celebrate being the Final 3, with Paul taking credit for dragging them both to the end. Josh freaks out because he was the underdog the whole time. Christmas is happy to be there with her teammates. Paul brags about how impressive he is for making it to the finale again. Christmas doesn’t know who she’d take to the Final 2. Josh wants to take out Paul and go with Christmas.
As the Final 3 enjoys a delicious meal, they reminisce about the season and we get to see a lot of clips we didn’t see the first time around.
First, they start with the Showmance Clips. Even though Josh doesn’t think that “Jody” was a real showmance, we get a segment about them, centering on Cody telling Jessica about his daughter. It’s very sweet, with Cody bragging about how his kid is smart and pretty, not one of those “booger eaters.”
There’s a whole segment about Paul and Christmas’ relationship, with lots of flirting and cuddling. Josh feels like a third wheel. Christmas admits that Paul makes her smile and gives her the giggles. They also show the viral clip of Christmas in the HoH bed watching Paul and talking to herself about how her heart is getting away from her.
Matt and Raven’s showmance segment is about them throwing food on each other. They make a total mess, with Matt mocking her and Raven going nuclear.
Next we are treated to a series of Kevin-themed clips. We see Kevin telling Matt that he won the $25,000, claiming that he didn’t tell anyone else. This is absurd revisionist history because Paul has known the entire time. Why is the show blatantly lying to us about this?
Matt tells Paul and Raven and Kevin finds out and confronts Matt, denying that he told him anything. Kevin says Matt made it up and Kevin gets into a big fight with Matt, Raven and Alex. Kevin, Raven and Alex yell, calling each other bad game players.
Sadly, they’re all correct.
Kevin gets another segment about his various gangster stories. The other HGs aren’t sure if he’s actually in the mob.
We also see Kevin tell Jason about his father going to jail and losing his house to pay the lawyers. Kevin is sure getting a lot of time in this clip show. They seem to be pushing hard for him to win America’s Favorite Player. (Maybe the producers are trying to make it up to him for all those horrible things Jason said about Kev’s wife and kids?)
Next, it’s time for some critter-themed clips. We learn that there was an actual, literal rat in the kitchen. Josh is terrified while Paul hunts the rat. They sprinkle cheese on the floor to lure it out and trap it under a pot. Apparently, these knuckleheads think they’re in some sort of bad a Bugs Bunny cartoon.
We then move on to the “snake” clip. We get a repeat of the whole “Dominique calls Paul a snake” drama, but now we get to see more footage of their fight. In hindsight, Dominique was 100 percent correct in her claim that Paul used his status as a vet to trick people into thinking he had all of the answers.
But then again…these people were stupid enough to fall for it, so can we really blame Paul?
We see clips of the ugly fights, with Paul rallying everyone against “Jody,” and Mark standing up for Cody, resulting in Josh unleashing his pots and pans wrath on him.
They revisit the three Den of Temptation offers, with Paul and Christmas gloating about winning while Josh questions why Jessica won the Halting Hex. Thanks for reminding us that this twist is a huge reason why Paul and Christmas are still in the game.
We also get to see a great diary room montage with everyone talking about how much they hate each other. There are also a lot of tears and a surprisingly large amount of Cameron. It’s basically all Mark and Josh crying, with Cody hilariously calling this season’s guys pathetic.
The episode ends with Paul, Josh and Christmas starting Part 1 of the final HoH competition, and yes, Christmas is eligible to play. They stand on a cloud and hold a rope coming out of a unicorn’s butt…as you do.
The last person to hold themselves up wins. The unicorns fart giant clouds of glitter and colored dust. Winning the final HoH may not be a good thing, though.
The two-hour Big Brother 19 finale airs Wednesday on CBS.
Until then, head over to Buddy TV for more ‘Big Brother 19’ news, games and polls!