‘Teen Mom OG’ Season 7 Finale: Baby Kicks & a Bag Full of Pee Sticks

“I don’t care what Cousin Krystal says– I’m never eatin’ a gas station chicken sandwich again! This baby’s kickin’ my Leah tattoo!”

Crack open a radioactive-colored wine cooler, grab a trash bag to puke into and settle into your giant stuffed sloth as we head into the home stretch of this season of Teen Mom OG.

That’s right; this season is coming to an end. Of course, because they crammed so many episodes into this season, it legit feels like we have been recapping this season for years! Farrah’s already gone through about three different faces since we first began!

Our first stop is Tennessee to check in with Maci. As per usual, the kids are running amok– swinging bats, throwing blocks and climbing into wooden crates. Exhausted from all child-wrangling, Maci and her friend Katie hit up the nail salon for pedicures.(And, because this is Maci, the pedicures also include all the boxed wine you can drink. I mean, can you even have someone scrap fungus from underneath your toenails without guzzling some cheap white zinn?)

Maci doesn’t want to talk about foot fungus, though. Naturally, she needs to yap about her favorite subject: her ex, Ryan. Maci tells Katie that Mackenzie and Ryan are expecting an oopsie baby of their very own.

Maci says that Ryan still hasn’t taken a drug test to prove he’s been off the smack long enough to warrant a visit with Bentley. Katie says for Bentley’s sake, she hopes Ryan turns something around besides his baseball cap and Maci agrees.

“Why don’t you wait until he passes out in a pool of his own pee and collect some for a test? I saw that trick in White Trash Weekly magazine!”

Over at the doctor’s office, Mack and Ryan get everything checked out with the pregnancy and also get to hear their baby’s heartbeat. As the doctor points out the currently-sack-shaped fetus, Ryan tells everyone he thinks it looks like a boy. (Well, it makes sense…when it comes to dingalings, it takes one to know one, right?)

Ryan is on the struggle bus currently. He’s sucking on some sort of lollipops (yes, plural)…at the obstetrician’s office. He can’t be bothered to take either pop out of his mouth while talking to the doctor, so everything he says sounds slurry and mumbly. (Where are those subtitles they use when they go down to the holler to visit Leah Messer & Friends!? Help us out, MTV!)

“Wake me up when the kid’s 18…or whatever…”

We learn that the baby is coming in October, which is also probably the time we’ll see Ryan make like a bread truck and haul buns outta there!

Ryan has had enough of the baby talk and whatnot. He looks like death warmed over, and keeps telling his wife (who, mind you, is up in the stirrups) that he wants to go home because he’s “hurting.”

It’s probably all that sobriety that’s causing him to feel yucky. Yeah, that’s it…

“You got another one of them exam tables I can grab a few ZZ’s on, Doc? You ain’t gotta put them stirrups up for me!”

Next, we head over to Indiana where there’s been a major development:

AMBER HAS LEFT THE COUCH! I repeat… AMBER HAS LEFT THE COUCH!

Amber is actually hanging out in her baby’s nursery (most likely scoping out the best snoozing spots), while baby daddy Andrew video chats with some LA friends about “the biz.”

Andrew’s friends tell him they’ve gotten funding for “the pizza thing” they had all been working on and they want Andrew to come out to California for two months right after the baby is born.

(For the love of Baby Butch, please tell me that “the pizza thing” is actually going to be some sort of game show in which Andrew and Gary compete in a pizza-eating baby daddy showdown, while they are both wearing “Dad Bod” shirts. I’d much rather watch that than watch Ambie yak into a grocery bag. Make it happen, MTV!)

“Please don’t tell our parents we were on this landfill of a TV show…”

Andrew runs the plan to go to California by Amber and she’s on-board. (Hopefully Andrew took the time to explain the concept of a job to Amber.) Andrew wants Amber and the baby to go with him on the adventure and she’s excited.

While Amber is OK with the plan, she warns Andrew that she’ll be spending money like she’s Kieffer in a cannabis store! She tells him that she’ll need to make herself “comfortable” while they’re in California.

“California?! I better wash up on my Rudolph onesie! I want to look chic for all of Andrew’s Hollywood friends!”

As an afterthought, Amber throws in that Leah will be on summer break then and maybe Gary will find it in his dad bod to let her come out for a visit.

Over in Michigan, Tyler is having a blue Christmas, given that he and Nova are celebrating without Catelynn, who is still at the treatment facility.

A week later, Cate finally makes it home to an excited Tyler and Nova.

This could melt anyone’s cold dead heart…except maybe Farrah’s, of course…

Later, Cate tells Tyler her plans for aftercare now that she’s out of rehab. She’s planning to do things with Nova and take time for herself. Tyler is excited to show her all of the things he’s had done to their new house while she was away. They go check it out and Catelynn seems uninterested, muttering, “Yeah, it’s dope.” (Because…apparently it’s 1994 again?)

She tells Tyler she’s exhausted and then goes and curls up in a ball while Tyler and one of the workers move some cabinets around. At least she didn’t order Tyler to make her a quesadilla for lunch or something, so there’s that…

I’ll just go ahead and ask the question we’ve all been thinking…when is it TYLER’S turn to go to rehab!? This dude has been touring the nation’s finest treatment facilities, visiting whatever relative happens to be petting therapy horses and writing poems and whatnot for over a year now.

WHEN DOES TYLER GET TO PET SOME DAMN HORSES!?

“I’ll even settle for a pony at this point! Or, hell, even Butch’s old hacked-off rat-tail!”

Next up, we head to Jen and Larry’s Casa de Enable to watch as Ryan and Mack share the details of their thrilling doctor’s appointment. (They left out the part about Ryan being two Tootsie Pop licks away from passing out in the baby doctor’s office, of course.)

Mackenzie decides to regale us with the story of how she informed Ryan that she was sperminated. Apparently, she made the big announcement by slipping her positive pregnancy test into Ryan’s fast food bag.

AS.YOU.DO.

Poor Ryan. He’s just trying to slop down a couple of McRibs, minding his own business before taking his second mid-afternoon nap, and he comes across a wet Clear Blue Easy that tells him he’s now locked into fatherhood for another 18 years. If his stomach wasn’t churning already from his meat-byproduct sandwich, that pregnancy news surely did the trick!

That moment Producer Jeni realized she made a big mistake stealing a few fries from Ryan’s food bag that day…

“There was a pee stick in my food bag,” Ryan reiterates.

Everyone thinks this is hysterical and not at all disgusting and unsanitary. Go figure.

Mack says Ryan started freaking out about the news, which she assumes was due to his excitement. (Spoiler alert: It wasn’t.) Mackenzie says she had to remind him that they married and “adults” now so it’s OK to have an oopsie baby or two.

Next, we go back to Amber’s place, where she and Cousin Krystal are s**t-chatting about Gary. (The editing is so bad on this show these days. I kind of love that they don’t even try to make scenes look cohesive anymore, although I do miss the days where they’d make the girls wear really bad wigs to cover up stuff that was filmed earlier.)

“What do you mean I don’t get my own scenes this episode? I need that MTV money to get my other kids’ names tattooed on my boob!”

Anyway, Amber tells Cousin Krystal that Leah is more interested in having sleepovers with her friends these days than visiting with her and it’s hurting her feelings. Amber thinks things will be better when the baby arrives (umm… sure) and then tells Krystal that Leah is the only reason she’s even staying in Indiana.

Well at least she’s not putting her 9-year-old on a guilt trip or anything…

“When is Leah going to stop giving her attention to random people she just met and finally pay attention to me? Who would do such a thing?!”

We then get to listen in as Gary and Kristina talk about how Leah would rather hang out with her galpals then watch her mom shop for baby crap. Gary says Amber wants him to switch weekends with her so that Leah’s outings with her friends fall on Gary’s days instead of hers.

Gary tells Kristina he doesn’t want to give up his time his kid. (Kudos to Gary for actually wanting to see his child. Most of the dads on these shows only want to see their kid when it’s convenient for them and/or it will help them to get some sort of Instagram product sponsorship or something.)

He tells his wife that he has to tiptoe around the subject with Amber because “anytime you say anything, she gets mad.” (Again, you can’t blame Gary. He just doesn’t want to end up getting blood on his DadBod shirt. I can respect that.)

Back in Tennessee, Maci sits down to “help” Bentley with his homework, though we quickly learn he’s just fine on his own after he finds the solution before Maci does. Apparently, Maci ain’t much for the mathin’ and numberin’. (The upside to having Ryan as his dad is that Bentley can go to him when they start learning about weights and measures. Surely Ryan is an expert on adding grams and ounces. Who says there’s no hope with dope!?)

“Are you trying to tell me that you can count math without using your hands? This boy is a damn genius!”

Meanwhile, Ryan and Mackenzie are sitting down for dinner with Jen and Larry. (Jen is somehow refraining from cutting Ryan’s meat for him.) She asks Ryan about his sobriety and he tells her he “feels normal.”

Um…that isn’t exactly reassuring, bro.

Naturally, Ryan is chewing a big ol’ pinch of tobbacy as he tells his family that having a new baby will be a good thing because it will give him a little person to stay sober for. (Apparently that little blond boy that comes around sometimes and calls him “Dad” wasn’t enough?)

Um…did Jen spray that window snow stuff on her glasses? Maybe this is why she can’t see through Ryan’s lies?

Larry tells Ryan that he knows this is a struggle for him, but that “we’re on the same damn train, and when it wrecks, we wreck.” Clearly the train he’s referring to is the crazy train, and yes, the word “wreck” is definitely fitting here.

Larry then says how proud he is of Ryan and how being honest and putting his story out there can help others. Oh boy…the timing of this speech is giving us legit cringe-sweats.

“I’m as sober as I was on both my wedding days, I can tell ya that!”

We go back to Michigan, where Cate is struggling to get back on schedule. She later tells Tyler that her anxiety is at an all-time high, which is causing her a lot of guilt. She says her medicine isn’t working but Tyler assumes it has something to do with him.

Cate says it stems from her “inner-child s**t” and tells Tyler he’s awesome and supportive but… she’s HIGH! HIGH! tailing it back to Arizona for more treatment.

“At least when I’m in Arizona I don’t have to listen to Tyler talk about fabric for kids’ tank tops.”

Poor Tyler looks shocked. He tries to hide his unhappiness about Cate’s plan, but, being faced with taking care of Nova solo again, coupled with the task of keeping his children’s clothing empire a float, it’s hard for Tyler to hide. Cate tells Ty that she wouldn’t blame him if he wanted to divorce her. Tyler tells her he’s in it for long haul and will be there for her…again.

After telling Tyler her plans to go back to treatment, Cate calls to let her doctor know what’s going on. Tyler suggests Cate consider outpatient treatment so she can still be at home, but Cate isn’t down for that and wants to head back to Arizona ASAP. She tells Tyler she isn’t sure how to handle the situation with Nova, who was thrilled when Catelynn came home the last time.

Later, Tyler goes to dinner with his sister, Amber. (Amber’s beau wasn’t able to join in on the dining excursion, what with his being leashed and all.)

“How much longer is this gonna take, Ty? Billy’s at home all charged up…and I ain’t talkin’ about his leash!”

Tyler tells Amber about Catelynn wanting to go back to treatment and Amber questions Cate’s decision. Tyler is concerned about Nova, or, “dude, our kid, bro” as he puts it. Tyler says that when he expressed his concerns over how Nova would react to Cate leaving again, Catelynn told her that Nova “will manage.”

Ouch. That’s frostier than Mackenzie’s hair highlights after that MTV check comes rollin’ in!

Tyler and Amber both agree that Cate’s comment was selfish, since Nova is only three years old. They also relate the comment to things Butch has said over the years, which is probably the lowest of blows. (No Butch, not that kind of blow!)

Tyler also tells Amber that maybe he’s not good enough for Catelynn.

Get this man a therapy horse, STAT. Seriously.

Later, it’s almost time for Cate to head back to treatment but before she does, she takes Nova to school. On the ride there, Nova is excited at the thought of her mom coming to pick her up later that day, but Cate lets her know that her daddy will be picking her up.

Nova seems to be putting the pieces together that her mom is leaving again. She starts crying in the backseat, telling Cate she doesn’t want to go to school. After handing Nova off to the teacher, Cate gets emotional about having to leave her once again.

Back at Amber’s, we learn that Gary sacked up and declined Amber’s offer to switch their weekends with Leah, which Amber is, of course, not happy about.

Producer David asks Amber if she thinks Leah is aware of the conflict going on with her and Gary and Amber says no, but admits she possibly she feels some tension.

“If you’re gonna spew again, try to blow the chunks away from me. I’m wearing my good red pants!”

Amber says she doesn’t want to go back to court to sort out her and Gary’s issues and she admits that although she used to be a bad mom and a “pill head,” she put herself in prison to turn her life around and that should count for something.

Um…yay?

Finally, we head out with Maci, who is having lunch with her long-lost mother, Sharon. Maci tells her mom the news about Ryan and Mackenzie having a baby, and you know Sharon’s gonna have something to say about that! (I like me some Sharon; she does NOT play.)

Maci’s mom is shocked about the pregnancy. (Either she can’t believe Mackenzie let Ryan knock her up OR that Ryan was able to stay awake long enough to spread his seed.)

It’s like looking into a crystal ball and seeing what Maci will look like in 15 years…

Maci tells her mom that Ryan has yet to turn in a drug test to her. Sharon tells her that if Ryan were clean, he would already given her a drug test to prove it.

Maci has gone a bit “Inspector Gadget” on us. She says “her people know people” who have told her that Ryan isn’t clean. (Would those people be literally anyone with working eyeballs?)

Sharon says Ryan has to take the lead on his sobriety and that no one else can make him change. Maci tells her mom she’s basically fed up with the addict antics.

While Maci and her mom are boozing and crap-talking about Ryan, it’s bad times for our newlyweds. Ryan’s in a bad way. He’s shivering and acting like he’s got the plague. Ryan criticizes Mack’s driving, moaning that he just wants to get home. Once they arrive at their house, we hear them inside and Ryan complains of the house being cold, which Mack denies.

Ironically, Ryan is like the only cast member of this show who DOESN’T want to go to rehab…

Ryan tells her he doesn’t know if he can deal with her attitude and that maybe they just need to separate for the next…say…nine months. That way, the ‘Teen Mom’ Trap Baby will have already come slip-sliding out of Mackenzie’s spawn chute and he won’t have to deal with her pregnancy hormones.

Ain’t that just so special?

That’s it for this season! Next, the gang will check in with Dr. Drew!

To read our previous ‘Teen Mom OG’ recap, click here!

(Photos: MTV)

89 Comments

  1. This show has become painful to watch. Most of the teen parents have never grown up and – if anything – have managed to regress in most cases. Maci is the only one who has taken responsibility and created a sense of normalcy for her family. Ryan and Mackenzie are living in lala land. Ryan needs help – with drugs and many other issues. He is just not right in the head. Mackenzie clearly doesn’t have his best interests at heart. If she did, she wouldn’t have gotten pregnant. That’s the last thing he needs and my heart breaks for this baby. Farrah comes across as mentally deranged. When she speaks, it sounds like the ramblings of a crazy person. Sometimes I feel like she needs a translator. The damage that she has done to Sophia is unspeakable. I’m glad she’s off the show. It hurt to watch her segments between her craziness and her abusiveness to everyone around her… not to mention how she neglects Sophia’s education and development and constantly exposes her to inappropriate things. And Deb has taken the bus to crazy town and Michael is too scared to speak his mind. It’s just horrifying to watch, honestly. I’ve always rooted for Amber and I respected her decision to go to jail and get her life in order but she is her own worst enemy. She constantly puts herself in situations that put her mental health and sobriety at risk. And adding a baby to the mix – especially knowing she’s at risk for PPD – is just horrifying. Her new boyfriend seems a little off – I’m hoping it’s just an “awkward on camera” thing and not something else. She needs someone stable. What she really needs is to be single for a while and to find strength in herself but it seems that ship has sailed. And I think Gary is a manipulative prick who purposely pushes Amber’s buttons and who claims to be a great parent but tends to leave the actual parenting to Kristina. She is a blessing for Leah. As for Catelynn, depression is awful and if she is truly suicidal then she needs to seek treatment for that. But she’s another one who can’t get out of her own way. Smoking pot and trying for a baby when she isn’t ready mentally/emotionally/physically is just beyond inappropriate. Your job isn’t to give your kid a sibling, it’s to provide your kid with stability and love. And Tyler puts way too much pressure on her to have another kid which isn’t right either. Those two need to focus on their relationship and on their issues from their pasts and on their sweet daughter. The rest can wait. I feel really terrible for a lot of these kids. Most of them seem like they are doing fine but I worry about them down the line. The only kid who is already showing concerning red flags is Sophia. I really, truly worry for her and her future. It’s honestly heartbreaking.


    1. Nah, Gary duoesn’t push her buttons at all! She’s a worthless excuse for a Mom. Asking questions and wondering why Amber won’t buckle down and be a parent is NOT pushing buttons. He’s asking questions.


      1. *claims SHE doesn’t answer. Maci has dirt on Ryan, which is why he runs like a little bitch when she wants to confront him.


  2. I am dying to know what Jen meant when she said there is a lot more going on between Maci and Ryan that no one else knows. Wtf did that mean? I think she said it in the preview for next weeks part 2 reunion show.


    1. Could have something to do with the recent restraining order Maci and Taylor put on Ryan. I think he threatens Maci all the time, but then claims he doesn’t answer him. If someone was telling me they were going to put a bullet in my head, I wuoldn’t answer them either.


    1. Yep. Larry went from hating Ryan and wouldn’t piss on him if he were on fire to making him the national spokesperson for drug recovery and father of the year. I think Larry is jumping the gun a little.


  3. That really bothered me too, but y’all know I can’t stand Amber anyway. I’ve said that on here many times. Thank God for Gary and Kristina. Mackenzie makes me sick. She’s SO self- righteous and annoying. Aw, poor little Mack didn’t get her fairy tale wedding. HELLO??? THAT’S BECAUSE YOU MARRIED A FREAKING DRUG ADDICT!!


    1. Funny thing about that is, what that the hell else did she want them to show?! They showed the vows, they showed the first dance, they showed them feeding each other the cake. What else did she want? MTV can’t show footage that doesn’t happen! Face it, your marriage is a sham, bitch! Who the fuck does she think she is? She ain’t an OG!


  4. It is clear as day that Rhine isn’t sober. Maci’s mom is 100% right….hes not taking the drug test because he clearly isn’t sober…and his banshee of a wife is on my nerves. The amount of enabling and covering up she does for him is nauseating. I’m sure Rhine wasn’t showing any type of excitement when she told him that she was pregnant. If anything he was probably very unenthused that he’s now stuck with her for at least 18 years


  5. Also – I think that’s the realest Tyler has ever been in that scene where he’s talking to his sister about Cate…


  6. That scene with Cate and Tyler was hard to watch… Ryan was starting to get dope sick and wanted to get home to his stash ASAP… and Larry could be a motivational speaker, I swear… which is IRONIC AF considering Ryan is his child.


  7. Addiction is an awful family disease and there are no instruction manuals for how to handle someone you love that is struggling with addiction. The people that love you constantly second guess every move they make with their addicted loved one. Also two of the hardest things in the world for a parent is to watch your addicted child slowly kill themselves or to lose a child to addiction. Jen and Larry need all the love and support they can get from the world without judgement from us because they are doing the best they can. believe me you do not want to ever go through what they are going through right now.


  8. Addiction is an awful family disease and there are no instruction manuals for how to handle someone you love that is struggling with addiction. The people that love you constantly second guess every move they make with their addicted loved one. Also two of the hardest things in the world for a parent is to watch your addicted child slowly kill themselves or to lose a child to addiction. Jen and Larry need all the love and support they can get from the world without judgement from us because they are doing the best they can. believe me you do not want to ever go through what they are going through right now.


  9. Catelynn has already traumatized Nova giving her abandonment issues by leaving her all the time. If not off to rehab, she leaves her with April. Nova is three 3 years old and that was the age I started remembering things. As a matter of fact, my father left when I was three and I remember it. Catelynn even said on the reunion show that Nva was begging Catelynn not to leave her when she went on stage. Catelynn likes sympathy and attention. Period. Hell, , at least she had her father until she was 12 and apparently April could not have been that bad because Catelynn is constantly leaving Nova with her, which I don’t get. Why would you leave your daughter with the person who traumatized her? Catelynn just likes her mini-vacations at the spa playing with the horses, getting her nails and hair done while forgetting that she is a mother and wife. I could not believe she was at choosing the spa over spending Christmas morning with her baby. The same baby that thanked fir coming back. No child should have to thank a mother for coming back. Ugh! She is flat out selfish. I wonder if she reads these comments?


    1. Let’s hope so. I keep hoping each support horse or rehab flight will be the last. As it was said, Tyler needs a pony by now. I am guessing there are extreme issues of guilt of not wanting to be a mom twice that have to be ironed out. It seems like therapy is seeping in very slowly but a long way to go.


  10. Mack’s probably already taken out a life insurance policy on Ryan. Girl is devious. Do insurance policies pay out if the death is due to drug overdose?


  11. The shot of Andrew sitting next to Amber’s stuffed sloth is priceless. I feel like there was a missed opportunity with that caption, no?


  12. 14 year old boy-man will never grow up and take responsibility for the children he makes. Mack will never care about Ryan. Ryan’s parents will forever be enablers. Amber will be forever sitting on the couch complaining she doesn’t see Leah. Cate will always be in therapy. Tired of the same shot being shown.

    The reunion shows are so boring. Dr. Drew needs to grow a pair.


  13. I lost my brother to an accidental overdose after years of addiction (with occasional stabs atsobriety), and after watching what my parents went through and knowing how infuriating it can be from the outside, enabler parents like Jen and Larry believe they are doing what is best, and especially with him being an only child I’m sure it’s even harder. It is easy to scream “Enabler!” (And don’t get me wrong, they are) but it is very complex and difficult. I’ve also seen my parents in the aftermath of my brother’s death, and I truly hope Jenn and Larry don’t have to go down that road. Heartbreaking doesn’t even begin to describe it.

    Now as for Mack, her selfishness knows no bounds. Any addiction counselor and recovery program will STRONGLY discourage any major life changes in the first year of sobriety. Stuff like, ohhhh, having a baby. Even if he IS sober (which, uh…) Ryan is not equipped to handle major stress. He just isnt, he WILL relapse. And she should, and likely does, know this. If she loved Ryan and supported his sobriety, she would have held off on getting knocked up. You know this whole oopsie baby was her idea, God knows Ryan is barely a willing participant.


    1. Mack is worse than useless, and also fans the flames over Maci and Bentley: granted, I”m sure it was hard to come into a situation where the baby mama is so adored by baby daddy’s parents, BUT…..she does nothing but try to rile up the dissent between Ryan and Maci, while being a really nasty example of “single motherhood” herself with snarling at her little guy when he’s being ‘bad” that he’s “just like your father!” I don’t blame Jen for crying at that hysterically awful first “wedding”…(and seriously who buys herself a wedding gown for THAT level of “ceremony,” unless you are more wrapped up in the trimmings than anything else?)… Jen and Larry are yes, enablers, but I think they also caught on early on that Mack was the WORST possible person person to come into all their lives.


      1. I hated how she told him he’s just like his father (in a negative way). How is a little boy supposed to take that???


      2. I love when people use the word dissent. I don’t know why. So good.
        & completely agree with everything of course. Mack is a psycho.


    2. ITA, when you are faced with “if you don’t get clean I will stop taking your calls,” that is REALLY hard to do when you love the person! And you know that they are going to downward spiral…you just can’t want someone to be sober more than THEY want it. Addiction is the worst.


  14. I just want to scream at Cate that motherhood is not about depression or yourself. It’s about selfless sacrifice and if that means getting your sad ass out of bed every day, DO IT!!! I have a non-verbal child and do you think I lay in bed feeling sorry for myself? No. I get up and do everything I can for him every single day.

    Cate, you have no idea how lucky you are. Stay home snd take care of your beautiful, amazing daughter!!! She’ll be grown up too soon.


  15. I don’t have any sympathy left for Amber, and barely any for Cate after this episode! Maybe its time for Cate and Tyler to move to another state, and her to actually stop using her depression as a crutch and try to stay at home with her daughter! I’m glad Maci out her foot down with Ryan taking a drug test! I won’t want my son in a car with him, much less around him period! I think if he doesn’t get some help soon, he’s going to end up dead before that poor baby is even born. Wake up people and stop the enabling!


    1. Agreed on all points. The irony of Cate whining about her mother-induced “trauma” while blatantly dismissing what her own daughter is going through is just too much for me. I’m finding it harder and harder to sympathize with her. And Amber is so unreasonable and immature…she only cares about Amber. It’s all about what Leah can do for her, and it makes me sick. So much selfishness out of these people. They truly never developed as adults because of this awful show, and are very much stuck in a juvenile state of mind


  16. It was so cute the way she said thank you for coming back. But a small child should not have to say it that way. We all understand that cate has issues but it seems like she hasnt tried to stay home with her family and be happy on her new meds which she said makes her feel better.


    1. And what was worse is that Cate did not take that opportunity to pick Nova up and hug her and reassure her that mommy will always come back, and that she loves her and missed her and is so happy to be home with her. Instead she said, “you’re welcome.” That struck me as cold and detatched. I hope that does not become a childhood memory for Nova


  17. Both Amber and Cate often cite their depression issues when it comes to spending time with the children they already have. So I guess the simplest common denominator here, especially with Cate’s recent miscarriage and Amber’s current pregnancy is: “Why have more?”

    Dunno, maybe it’s just me. But perhaps between Leah, Nova, and Carly, I think Carly might have been blessed with the best deal out of the three for never having to “thank” her mom for coming back.

    (Still wrenches my gut after hearing that adorable little Nova utter those very telling words.)

    SMDH


  18. Sharon is a smoke show and clearly she knows.

    Maci was bloated mess in that scene, the booze is taking its toll.


  19. Ryan’s scenes need to come with a trigger warning for people in recovery. They are HARD to watch. He’s so obviously either high or going through withdrawals, it’s painful to watch.


    1. he is going through early withdrawal here, I agree it hurts to watch. someone extremely close to me in my home is on medication for heroin addiction, and he describes trying to come off that medication is harder than heroin. I feel ryans pain here, the shivering, lollipops… mack is not equipped to help him


  20. Cate’s suicidal threats are the lowest form of manipulation I have ever seen.

    For all her snot-sucking about how she’s a “damn good mom”… eff her.


    1. I’m 27 and my mom has been in and out of a mental clinic the last couple of years. She told me after she came out of one late last year that she needed to talk to us about how she was suicidal etc, and even though im an adult it messed my mind up a bit. It’s not something to sort of unload on your kids. I can’t imagine Tyler’s stress and what nova would think if she heard her mother talk the way she does


      1. Oh absolutely! I traumatized my daughter by joking on the phone to my mother about how poor I was after a trip to Ulta. She was in her mid teens and was convinced we were broke… over her eyeshadow palettes. She was legitimately in fear for our financial security for months over an offhand joke.

        I cannot imagine how frightening having your mom share that with you must have been.


    2. Yes!! Thank you! I’ve been saying this for months- threatening suicide when someone calls you out on bad behavior is a type of abuse and manipulation. If a man did that, everyone would hate his guts. She’s using it as a threat and that is SO wrong!


  21. Can I just add that I find Andrew’s snarking on Gary and Leah’s parenting WILDLY annoying? This is a dude who has unprotected sex with a bat shit crazy woman he barely knows, dps his job to move in with her, and..has the balls to attack the couple who have raised “her” daughter for years while she indulges in booze pills, and the kind of men that yes..knock up a “star” and move in with her ASAP? Talk to us in 10 years Andrew, let’s see how YOUR parenting skills match up,


    1. Andrew needs to take several seats. He gets no opinion on Leah or her parents, Gary and Kristina. He’s been around for 5 minutes. He is about to learn allllllll about what it’s like to be Gary.


      1. Yes, and obviously I meant Gary and Kristina’s parenting of Leah. Andrew is what, 40 and has managed not to impregnate anyone until now, so I’d say this pregnancy was deliberate on both sides, and again, incredibly stupid on both sides as well..even if pregnancy is not seen as a “problem,” have these idiots never heard of STDs? Anyway, Gary has been a stand up dad from the start, anyone else have flashbacks to Amber where else, on the couch on that little apartment they had, lolling about when Gary would come home from work..remember when these people had jobs?…and poor Leah would be in her crib, dirty diapers, hungry, screaming….Gary would go to care for her while we’d hear, what else, Amber announcing ‘I’m beginning to get pissed here!”? Unless Andrew is more of a man than it seems so far, or she hires alive in a nanny, this baby is doomed.


  22. Pretty sure he was arrested for violating his probation the week after they filmed the reunion. So he must have threatened Maci and Taylor before and after the reunion filmed since they got a restraining order the same week he was arrested. His ex Shelby posted something yesterday which sounded like she was alluding to Ryan contacting her.

    I think Catelynn is very manipulative. She knows Tyler isn’t going to give her crap about going back to rehab while they’re filming. And the whole “I don’t blame you for wanting a divorce” is such a low move.

    I couldn’t believe Amber said Gary should have understood her depression when her and Matt broke up because they’d “been together 3 and a half years”. Um…you’ve been a mom for 10 years you twit. Suck it up, put your big girl pants on and make an effort to see your kid. I don’t care how depressed you are. She could have gone over to Gary’s at least a couple days a week and visited Leah and then went home and crawled back into bed. Ugghh with this chic. Andrew’s going to have a rude awakening when their baby is born.


  23. I’m sure Amber would like to take Leah to CA with her, since Leah is now old enough to be the new baby’s nanny so he doesn’t interfere with AMber’s bed time which seems ot be about 23 hours a day: if she could find a way to pee in bed, i”m sure it would be 24.


    1. I think its funny how almost every sentence or comment about amber talks about her laying down somewhere. It’s pretty much exactly what i see on that boot camp show too. She is literally always relaxing. So that must be real life for her all day.


      1. Well in all fairness, in the past, we DID see her semi-upright and out of bed…sitting in the garage on lawn chairs with Matt, which I’m sure the neighbors found amusing. But think about it: how often have we seen Amber both upright and in motion?

        I’ve had it with all these people really, WhileI’ve never “liked” Maci, she and the hubby seem to enjoy life with their pasle of kids and are always busy doing something with them, beer in hand or not.

        Tyler has been delusional about Carly, as has Cate, but….while I realize he has his co-dependent “I am the rock!” role, I really wish he’d pack up Nova and walk away from Cate, who i”m sure would threaten suicide as ever.

        Maci gets points for family, as does Tyler, and again, Leah is so lucky to have Gary and Kristina as basic, loving, salt of the earth parents. Leah nailed it years ago, saying to Kristina “You are the best thing that has ever happened to me.” And BTW, I’ll just note is doesn’t sound as if Gary had any super-happy childhood, either, but he’s not let that stop him from being a good daddy to his girls.


    2. I don’t get why Amber & Andrew don’t just move to Cali now. She could have Leah come out for trips in the summer and just be a mom who sends gifts and money to make HERSELF feel better, and Leah wouldn’t have to deal with her selfish “mom” or wonder when she’ll see her next since it’ll be so infrequent, and would always be a planned trip.
      My dad lives a few provinces away and honestly, I never felt like I was missing anything and it was nice to receive gifts in the mail and go on summer vacations together, but not have the stress of switching houses every week like all my friends had to with their divorced parents.


  24. Mackenzie is an idiot for wanting to go theough her pregnancy this way. She obviously cares little about the child that is coming out of this sham of a marriage.


  25. -Lost my damn mind at “make like a bread truck and haul buns out of there!”
    -Amber is selfish.
    -Cate is selfish. “She’ll manage” is right up there with “Sophia is doing her own thing, and I’m doing mine”.
    -I don’t even like Tyler, but yeah, he deserves his own damn therapy horse. Cate’s is virtually new, and has hardly been used, so maybe she’ll share?
    -Ryan’s double-lolli was beautiful. Poor guy basically woke up married and was probably what is legally considered raped to make a mack truck trap baby. He at least deserves a pop and a nap without Snakenzie’s ‘tude.
    -Tyler’s sister went from “do you have a cigarette?”, to “Can you break a $100” last episode. How did she resurface as Kim Jr.?
    -Bentley is literally the most handsome little guy I’ve ever seen. He’s always been a cutie, but with Maci’s coloring, and the fact that he’s looking more and more like the heart-throb Ryan was once upon an unplanned pregnancy, he’s an absolutely gorgeous boy, and will no doubt be a stunning man.


  26. Anything thing after the reunion, Maci’s opinion seems like the opinion Ryan most cares and worries about.

    As much as I hate using the word ‘receipts’ I believe Maci has a whole slew of them. And Ryan is panicking because he knows it is going to blow up in his face. And Jen’s comment that “there is alot no one knows about going on between Maci and Ryan” is bullshit.

    It really just shows how enabling they are, he’s just “stressed” and blaming Maci. The guy created another Tindr account thinking he was pulling the wool over everyone’s eyes by lying about his age.

    Of course he would believe deleting text msgs Maci wrote in response would make them disappear forever.


  27. That’s a super difficult prescription to get and doctors have really cut down on prescribing it. I doubt with Ryans minimal rehab and after care he’d ever be able to get that prescription.


    1. Guy left everything in LA to move to Indiana with a woman he just met on a TV show she filmed with her ex. And knocked her up immediately. Your reservations are justified.


      1. Dude ain’t like Matt, sniffing around like niffler. His family has money and has some credentials working in the industry. And he had a job when met Rambo Ambo.

        Looking at his past, he has mental health issues. Obsessed with exes, weapons caches, and arrest for drugs. Other than Jenelle, I could see Amber a close second to a Dateline episode.


    2. I get bad vibes about Andrew and agree that he’s a sneaky creep too. In his scenes he’s just a quiet blob and always furtively watching everything and everyone.


  28. Im actually starting to feel reallu sorry for tyler. When is he gonna get a break???. Caitlin isnt a good mom. Shes not doing what is best for nova. That scene when she was driving her tp daycare broke my heart. She is very cold and not motherly at all. When nova said thank u for coming back and all she said was ur welcome. I wanted to punch her through the tv. And the she will manage comment was it for me. Im done with caitlin.tyler should leave


    1. They would absolutely live much better lives without being together. It would be hard, but I think would make everyone happier in time.


    2. And just to add to what i said. I think tyler wants to leave but hes probably scared if he does cait would try to kill herself. She needs to stop being so selfish and think about what her actions and words are doing to others. Was by no means a fan of tylers but. This past episode had me turning a corner with him. Grow up caitlin!!! Enough is enough of this shit. Shes very manipulative


      1. She is very manipulating and my heart is so cold with people like her, if Tyler wanted to leave and she threatened suicide I’d give her tips. She is not a wife or mother


  29. Yes!!!! Excellent recap as always.

    How long do we have to sit through Jen, Larry and Mack pretend Rhine is sober. He looks awful. Death warmed over is an accurate description. Bentley and Hudson deserve so much better.

    I can’t with Amber. You told Leah she could go to a sleepover on your weekend because you didn’t want to be an actual parent and say “no”. Now it’s Gary’s problem? Nope nope nope. Before agreeing to the sleepover, Amber should have discussed options with Gary. Either switching or Amber having Leah on Friday night, taking Leah to her sleepover on Saturday, and picking her up on Sunday morning. You know, something an actual parent might do. I realize taking your kid to sleepovers isn’t as exciting as spa days, but Amber said she wanted to be the parent. Talking about how magnanimous she is for not going to court is hilarious. First, she doesn’t want custody of Leah and that’s obvious. But, even if she did, no judge in their right mind would give her any kind of physical custody. She thinks of parenting as optional. Something she can walk away from whenever she’s tired or hungry or sad…or happy. Even now she thinks nothing of missing yet another summer vacation with Leah because California sounds so much more fun. She agreed to go before even talking to Gary. Leah has learned she is not Amber’s priority.

    Ugh, Cate. All out of sympathy for her.


  30. Last summer Amber saw Leah three times because she was busy being sad/filming in Cali for 11 days/falling in love/getting pregnant/going to Hawaii. And here we are, one year later and she’s going to miss ANOTHER summer with Leah and it’s all Gary’s fault. Or something. She’s as bad as Jenelle. Except Jenelle has the excuse of having the IQ of a stoned eggplant and letting Swamp Thing control her.


    1. She’s clearly already teeing this up to be Gary’s fault. When he balks at sending Leah to California for a week or two, she will get to cry fake tears. Meanwhile, she’s done nothing to build his trust and he rightfully has no faith that she will take care of her daughter. I’m convinced the only reason Gary let Amber take Leah to florida for Christmas is because they were going to Shawn/Bubby’s house and Gary trusts him. There will be no one to keep an eye on things in California. So now Amber gets to hang out in California all summer and wash her hands of Leah. Sweet deal ?


  31. Yeah, this was no “oopsie baby”, Mack got deliberately pregnant despite having such a mess for a husband. I feel sorry for the kid already.

    As I do for James. Amber won’t be a mom to him and if Andrew doesn’t step up, he will have no one. Leah at least has Gary and Kristina. She’s also old enough to know better and that her bio mom is full of excuses.

    Maci’s mom really looks like her, wow and it’s obv she only has Bentley’s intentions in mind. How dare he say he will have a reason to stay sober now, doesn’t he count too?! He is YOUR kid! Or will he immediately forget he has another one when this baby is born?! (Btw, I can see this happening, Mack making a scene like “But you are not together with her anymore while this is OUR kid!” )

    Poor Nova, she just got excited seeing her mom home and she leaves again. I do agree Tyler needs therapy too tho.


    1. You’re 100% right. Mack is the type of girl who would interfere with her SO’s custody agreement or whatever out not sheer jealousy. Notice she always has a way of bringing Hudson into things where his mention has no place? She is trying to downplay Bentley unless it is to get Ryan angry at Maci. Once this baby comes, she will make sure that Ryan has no time for Bentley, meanwhile convincing Ryan that it is Maci who is being unfair/difficult. She’s already made the tension between the families worse than it ever was. There was very little drama between Maci and the Edwards before Macktruck came into the picture (aside from Jen and Larry pushing Ryan to get more custody because THEY wanted time with Benny years ago). Jen and Larry were so close with her that they loved her other children, and attended their birthday parties, and even volunteered to baby sit them. If memory serves, even Jayde called Jen “Mimi”. Mac is messing with a little boys ability to spend time with his father, who he hardly saw to begin with, and she doesn’t even feel bad. Of all this shit things she’s done, I think I’m most angry that she’s made poor Bentley collateral damage, and doesn’t care at all.


  32. Ryan is clearly in withdrawal here and having had someone in my family go through it, it’s tough. Sort of kudos to him, until you hear he was busted again. He needs to get away from his whole family and get help, Mackenzie doesn’t seem to be the supportive type just by hearing her not take into account how he feels about something small like the house being cold.

    Cate pisses me off really badly, she is so miserable and uses her mental health to escape her life. Poor Nova doesn’t need someone so unstable and Tyler is looked over and just has to cope. It’s bull.

    Amber…. No words ever


  33. Is Ryan on some kind of opioid maintenance therapy? I’ve heard of Actiq, a fentanyl lollipop used to treat breakthrough pain in cancer patients, but I haven’t heard of them being used for maintenance therapy.


    1. It helps with the withdrawal symptoms like muscle cramps. To get over the worst of the worst, he can’t stay on them forever


  34. This is a particularly sad episode. When it comes to Rhine we are talking life, death and the life of innocents (when he peels himself off the couch and gets behind the wheel). There is something about Jenn and Larry, but especially Jenn that pulls at my heartstrings. I understand that she is an enabler, but I see her as the only one in their family of three that put a nice, pretty bow on everything to make it seem ok for so long and now that it’s all off the tracks, she feels completely overwhelmed. That makes me feel for her because I think she’s honestly a nice person, but she is in over her head as far as Rhine, his addiction and his succubus wife are concerned (5150 time folks). At this point, Rhine is walking around as a shell of a human being, completely devoid of emotion (even as he sees an ultrasound of his new child, for goodness-sake), he can not be expected to do even a small percentage of the adulting that the rest of us do in an average at. As far as Amber is concerned, now that she has another baby on the way and with a dude from California (yay!) I think she is already thinking she’s going to be a member of the Beverly Hills country club, rubbing elbows with Donna and Kelly, having Brandon bring them fresh drinks every half-hour. Newsflash honey, not going to happen. Andrew lived off his folks, now he lives off you, so when the TMOG money dries up, what do you think is going to happen? Unless the two of you come up with a plot to murder his rich uncle Jeeves, you’ll be right back in Indiana struggling to pay Indiana rent boo. I think since she got herself implanted by a man from there she thought she was automatically anchored there, not going to happen. It’s always been clear that Leah is an afterthought to her, but the real revelation from this episode is that Leah realizes this and is now straight up doing her own thing. I remember being that age, I played sports, so it was all about sleepovers, going for pizza after games, hanging at your buddie’s house watching movies, Leah has her own life and good on her for living it. I think this episode shows what great parents Gary and Kristina have been. Leah is a fantastic girl, who is clearly intelligent and well-adjusted and Ambie had ZERO to do with that. As far as Cate and Ty, as a longtime watcher I am empathetic, but at this juncture, Ty just has to let her go. There was a look in her eye during the segment where she was talking about why inpatient wasn’t enough where I saw that she really is not stable. I don’t know if that particular moment was cause because of the cocktail of meds that she was on that she says was not working (scary) or just plain despair, but at that moment I really felt for Ty and it was clear that she is in no state to handle the reality of an adult life with responsibilities. I have been thinking she was being selfish for wanting to leave Michigan to go to cushy infinity pool, horse therapy, wheatgrass rehab, but it is clear that whatever she wants to do Ty has to let her go, if only to save her life.


    1. “I think she is already thinking she’s going to be a member of the Beverly Hills country club, rubbing elbows with Donna and Kelly, having Brandon bring them fresh drinks every half-hour.“

      Dead. ?


  35. I laughed so hard at this recap..thank you!
    I feel sorry for Ty though. I wasn’t his biggest fan when he was an ahole to Carly’s adoptive parents but he came a long way since then!


  36. The suckers make me wonder is Ryan is using fentanyl lollipops or is just back on heroin since opiate use causes major sugar cravings. I sometimes wonder if Mackenzie is using a little bit herself. Not making any accusations, just something I’ve wondered (I don’t think she necessarily takes the “hard” stuff, but I could see her popping a pain pill or three).
    Something about the Andrew guy bothers me…just watching pt.1 of the reunion now and he always comes off somehow too slick and like something more devious is under the surface there. I wish Amber the best of luck, but I think she needs to focus more on Leah than other things and that in many ways she’s using this new baby to attempt to “redo” how she did things with Leah. Unfortunately I think Leah will end up having major issues because of her bio-mom’s shenanigans, but I think kristina is a good parent and I’m glad Leah has a stable home life with Gary, Kristina, Emilie, and Kristina’s daughters sometimes.


  37. Phenomenal recap as usual. So hysterical.

    These people are re-damn-diculius. Amber: please. Do you hear yourself talk? Do you realize your 9 year old is the adult in your house? Leah is not your girlfriend, or your parent—she is a child. If you want her to want to spend time with you, try spending quality time with her! Pick activities she enjoys. She doesn’t want to pick out decor and trains for the nursery of the baby you love enough to keep in your home (unlike Leah). She doesn’t care about a spa day. Why would she want to spend time with you when you fail,to make her a priority in your life?! And stop playing the martyr, reminding us all that you chose jail for Leah. Oh please. You chose jail because you (stupidly) thought it was easier than rehab. This doesn’t qualify you for mother of the year! A real mother puts her child before herself. Also, Dr Drew, you are so full of shit. How can you applaud Amber’s decision to stay away from Leah while in the dark place because it was better for Leah to not see Amber? That makes no sense to me. If you don’t want your child to see you abuse alcohol, don’t abuse alcohol!

    Ryan and Mackenzie—y’all deserve each other. But Jen, Larry, Bentley, Hudson and Maci don’t deserve your bull shit. If Ryan is sober and/or excited about a new baby, I will hire a damn sky writer to fly over their house with my profuse apology. I als have $50 that says this relationship doesn’t make it to their first wedding anniversary (either wedding). I truly could not believe tonight on the reunion that Ryan nor Mackenzie could keep a straight face while telling Dr Drew that Ryan can’t get treatment and therapy because he’s a b-list star of a reality tv show. It was truly laughable that they even had the gall to make that claim. You aren’t famous. You aren’t special. You aren’t even wealthy, if we believe Mack’s claim of $10,000 a week heroin addiction! Side note: Ryan’s comments on the reunion about getting pills from shady doctors really pissed me off. I have chronic pain due to a dysfunctional digestive tract and have to jump through hoops to get the pain meds I need to get out of bed every day. It’s situations like this that really screw people like me.

    I want Maci’s mom, Barb, Chelsea’s Dad, and Tyler’s mom (and probably Larry) to get a reality show together like The People’s Couch, where we watch them calling out people on reality shows. That would be amazing.

    Tyler and Maci really deserve an award for holding the show together this season. Everyone around them is a big old mess, but those two are good people.


  38. Nova is going to start thinking SHE is doing something wrong to make her mom keep leaving. Y’all grown ass adults want to talk about shit you “went through as a child”, while putting your own child through shit

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