‘Welcome to Plathville’ Season 2 Episode 6 Recap: First Tattoos & Fundie First Kisses

Why do I feel like this was exactly what Barry told Ethan in terms of what to do on his wedding night…

Interested in permanently altering your body to salvage your marriage? Want to reminisce about how awkward first kisses are? Have you been missing Micah and his ever-humble ways? If so, it’s time to travel down the road to Plathville!

This episode of Welcome to Plathville starts off with Micah skateboarding and talking about how he’s grown. Clearly TLC has run out of Micah storylines so until he starts getting naked in budget hotel rooms again, this is what we get. So… enjoy?

“Just roll with it, guys. I’ll be back to stripping and disappointing my parents again soon.”

Though still sad and feeling “trapped,” Olivia is drying her tears, leaving the kitchen counter and getting inked with Ethan today. Olivia lets us know these are her and Ethan’s first tattoos and they have decided to get a couples tattoo as part of working on their marriage. 

Nothing says “forever love” quite like permanently scarring your body to match your spouse, am I right? 

Oh, really? We thought for sure he was hiding a chest plate this whole time.

Ethan gets home and can barely fake his happiness about this tattoo plan. Olivia is generous enough to let him know he can back out, but before he can respond she babbles on about all the reasons he shouldn’t. Ethan lets us know he wouldn’t get a tattoo if he didn’t have a very stern blond woman forcing him to.

Yeah bro, we know.

The tattoo debacle is quickly dominating this episode as we find ourselves tagging along with Ethan and Olivia to the local tattoo shop.

The only way to accurately describe Olivia’s state during this adventure is some kind of mania? She seems to be really enjoying the fact that her husband wants to be literally anywhere but this tattoo shop with her. Olivia volunteers to get inked with the matching tattoo first, which seems pretty brave of her, considering Ethan looks like he still might run…and/or pee through his Dockers. 

Ultimately Ethan caves and gets inked. They then reveal their couples tattoos. It’s… umm… really something. They have gotten the King and Queen of Hearts tatted on their wrists.

The good news is that he thinks their hands now look like they are “supposed to be together.” Romantic thought to share with your wife.

Billy Shakespeare is quaking.

Olivia is chatting with her videographer friend Liv in California as they plan for Olivia’s upcoming trip to the Golden State. Olivia is looking forward to working and advancing with her business rebrand. Ethan walks in eating a slice of cheese..as you do.

He asks Olivia and Liv if he can tag along on the California trip and of all the things his loving wife could have responded with, she chose “oh, ummm, hmmmm.” How sweet of her.

It’s decided Ethan will join Olivia in California and she’s excited for them to go to Joshua Tree National Park together. Ethan doesn’t see the appeal of going to the desert to see a tree named Joshua but he knows that, at least if it’s a park, he probably won’t be forced to get another tattoo, so there’s that…

“Doesn’t this place have any Ethan trees?”

Now for the moment you’ve all been either dreading or waiting for: the long-awaited reunion of Moriah and Max – you know, the ones that broke up one week ago. Max comes over to help Moriah put up some patio lights and to practice “being her friend.” Moriah confesses to the camera at this point that she’s never been kissed! 

What are the chances that Kim and Barry had the “friends with benefits” talk with Moriah?

Moriah makes good on her promise to teach Max to dance and shortly after a pretty clumsy waltz from Max, they awkwardly hug, stand, stare and stand some more while everyone watching at home collectively yells, “KISS THE GIRL” in their best Sebastian voice.

Oh God…it hurts so good.

Right on the producer’s cue, the stars align and Max FINALLY kisses Moriah. It’s as awkward as you’d imagine an escaped fundie daughter’s first kiss to be, but at least these two can stop nuzzling now.

“How magical! I bet this is just how it happens in those movies we weren’t allowed to watch growing up!”

Moriah tries to go back in for some more action, but Max goes for a hug instead and then out of absolutely nowhere, Moriah asks if they can pray. You can take the girl out of the fundamentalist cult, but you can’t take the fundie out of the girl, apparently.

Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks could NEVER.

After that cringe-worthy encounter, Max and Moriah are back together, which is about as shocking as Micah taking off his shirt or Barry saying “right?” EVERY TIME he speaks. Shook. Just Shook. 

Dream big, girl.

Check back in next week to hear about the first time Ethan masturbated (oh dear God can we pray real quick?) and to find out if Micah gets a storyline!

To read The Ashley’s previous ‘Welcome to Plathville’ recap, click here! 

(Photos: TLC)

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