5 Things The Ashley is Grateful for This Thanksgiving

farrah-turkey
The Ashley is obviously thankful for her mad Microsoft Paint skills….

Happy Thanksgiving to all of The Ashley‘s American readers! As we all prepare to sit down at our dinner tables this year to attempt to cram a disgusting amount of mashed potatoes, various crunchy-onion-topped vegetables and pumpkin pie into our gullets, let us give thanks for the things in life that really matter: reality television and the people who appear on them for our amusement!

Each year on Thanksgiving, The Ashley takes the time to reflect on the things that she is grateful for. (Click here to read her post from 2015, here for the 2014 post, and here to read the one from 2013.)

This year, The Ashley is thankful for the following things…

1. Debra Danielsen’s closet

debra_danielsen_sophia
“I hear they’re having a sale on juniors’ hip-hugger jeans over at Old Navy! Feet don’t fail me now!”

Farrah Abraham’s mom never fails to prove that she’s “not like a regular mom.” (She’s a cool mom!) The Ashley is grateful that Debra frequently showcases her ultra-hip fashion sense on ‘Teen Mom OG!’ From belly-baring tops to leather pants to backless tanks, Deb’s everlasting bounty of Forever 21 club clothes is truly a marvel.

2. Jana Duggar

"Get stuck marrying some goon and making 100 babies with him? Yeah, that's gonna be a no from me..."
“Get stuck marrying some goon and making 100 babies with him? Yeah, that’s gonna be a no from me…”

The Ashley is thankful that eldest Duggar daughter, Jana, exists. As the oldest (and still unmarried) daughter of the Duggar clan, Jana gives us fans hope that at least one of the girls in this family has bigger dreams than just being a wife to some random goofball (here’s looking at you, Ben!), and a baby machine. Jana has managed to dodge the courtship/marriage/baby story line, unlike her younger sisters. In addition, Jana is selfless; always willing to lend a hand to her ungrateful sisters (here’s looking at you, Jessa!) and help her family out.

3. Gwen Stefani coming back to ‘The Voice.’

"I'm baaaack!"
“I’m baaaack!”

Whether you love Gwen or hate her…well, The Ashley doesn’t care because she loves her! The Ashley is thrilled that Gwen will be back on ‘The Voice’ for a third season, starting in February. Even if you don’t like Gwen on the show, having her as a Coach means that at least we won’t be subjected to another season full of Christina Aguilera and her stupid handheld fans!

4. Weird ‘Teen Mom’-hawked products

"Ugh....I've gotta get up and go sell some butt pads...."
“Ugh….I’ve gotta get up and go sell some butt pads….”

From yogurt to adult coloring books to that weird tea stuff that every reality TV star seems to be hawking on Instagram, the stars of the ‘Teen Mom’ franchise continue to use their followings to sell weird products…and The Ashley loves it! The girls (and their fellas) are always looking to make a buck, and sometimes the products they sell are just straight-out ridiculous. Who could forget Jenelle Evans hawking butt enhancement pads on The Instagram, or Farrah’s poorly spelled, oddly hashtagged offerings? Each month, a different ‘Teen Mom’ comes up with another money-making venture: online clothing lines, books and even weird baby urinals. The Ashley hopes that the ‘Teen Mom’ product train continues to chug along for many years to come!

5. Her readers!

The Ashley is so grateful for all of you, who come to The Roundup each day for your news and snark! The Ashley is so happy that there are others out there who share her love of bad reality TV and all the ridiculousness that comes with it!

 

Happy Thanksgiving! And if you’re going out shopping for Black Friday…try not to be the person who ends up on the news!

(Photos: MTV, NBC, TLC)

8 Comments

  1. Oooh, cocky 😉 Happy defamation lawsuit ;-). Did she ever actually sue and if so, win?
    Anyway, happy day after Thanksgiving to all the US residents. (Don’t let them squeeze to much money out of your pockets today with “super Black Friday only offers”. It has to make cents.)


  2. We’re grateful for you the Ashley for putting all the news and snark together with fabulous humor! I love your page and check it everyday. Happy Thanksgiving!

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