Trigger Warning: This story contains mentions of addiction, substance abuse and suicidal ideation.
‘Jersey Shore’ star Ronnie Ortiz-Magro is celebrating a new lease on life after revealing this week that he’s been sober from drugs and alcohol for four months.
The 40-year-old posted a series of snapshots to Instagram on Tuesday, including two side-by-side photos, which he claimed are a “reminder of a person [he] never wants to be again.” In the caption of his photo carousel, Ronnie thanked those who have showed him “love and support,” before opening up about the struggles he was battling earlier this year.
“ … I have never been one to hide my struggles,” Ronnie wrote. “I’ve discussed my struggle with mental health & addiction for years. I always shared hoping my story could reach at least one person. The beginning of this year I can admit and say it was one of the lowest points of my life and unfortunately it’s publicized to the world. My mental health and my addiction brought me to such a dark place it had me questioning whether this life is worth it.
“I’ve always struggle[d] with both but never at the same time,” he continued. “I felt something inside of me turn off. I stopped caring about the things that were most important to me. I started to resent this beautiful life I was given.”
Ronnie went on to tell fans that, while in this “dark place,” he attempted to fill the void he was feeling with things that ultimately hindered his “growth as a man and as a father.” Ronnie also revealed that, despite masking his struggles publicly, he was very much aware that he was “destroying everything [he] built and hurting the people [he] loves.”
As you may remember, concerns for Ronnie’s health and wellbeing were raised in April of this year after Ronnie was seen closing his eyes, seemingly nodding off and leaning forward during a cast interview with Stars on Sirius.
A week after the clip was posted, Ronnie took to social media to address the incident, stating that what happened during the interview was just his response to meds he takes for his mental health issues.
“Some recent emotional events had begun to wear on me,” Ronnie wrote at the time. “Medication had helped me manage my symptoms, but it can have side effects. Typically, I can work through the effects in private. Wanting to be with my castmates for a press tour celebration at the same time as carrying this weight required me to work through effects in a public setting. As a result, I was taped nodding off, which started rumors and accusations.”
In his post on Tuesday, Ronnie told fans that it was not his choice to fall into this dark place, insisting that nobody wakes up and decides they want to “destroy” their life by doing things that they know will “ruin [them].”
“The hatred and shame I felt for myself exceeded anything I’ve ever felt before,” he explained. “It wasn’t until my prayers were answered and I was able to try a medicine that freed me from the struggle and the fight.”
Ronnie went on to reveal that he sought treatment through an organization called “Beond,” while noting that his experience with the organization is not a “sales pitch.” According to its website, “Beond provides medically supervised ibogaine treatment for people living with PTSD, depression, anxiety, and chemical dependency, with physician oversight, continuous cardiac monitoring, and structured preparation and aftercare.”
According to Ronnie, working with the Cancun, Mexico-based organization “saved [his] life” and restored his “joy and love for the world.”
“It’s been 4 months,” he wrote. “I haven’t had to take any depression meds, anxiety, bipolar and touched a drink or drug. Never too late to start over. My journey starts now!”
Shortly after Ronnie posted his Beond testimonial on Tuesday, the organization shared the post to its Instagram Story, while thanking him for “sharing his story with such honesty and courage.”
“It was an honor to support him, and we’re cheering him on as his journey continues,” the organization added.
As Ronnie mentioned in his post, he has historically been open with fans about his mental health and substance abuse issues. Back in 2019, he did a stint in rehab for alcohol dependency, and in 2021, he stepped away from ‘Jersey Shore Family Vacation’ to seek mental health treatment. (Ronnie ultimately returned to the MTV series in 2024.)
In the comment section of his post, Ronnie explained that, this time around, he used Ibogaine to treat his addiction and mental health issues. (According to CNN, Ibogaine is a psychoactive compound made from the roots of an African shrub with anti-addiction properties that reduces cravings. It also is believed to help with mental health issues. Ibogaine is illegal to prescribe or possess in the United States currently but is available in Mexico, where Ronnie went.)
“I did Ibogaine,” Ronnie told someone. “I did rehab twice and I was miserable everyday I was sober taking meds it was a fight and now I’m free.”
View this post on Instagram
In the comments, Ronnie also told fans why he lied about being “good” following the April interview where he nodded off.
“But you told us you were good then?” someone asked in the comments. “And you weren’t? So how can we believe you now…?”
“I was good than my depression hit,” Ronnie responded. “So I did what I shouldn’t have done. I relied on substances to numb myself. Instead of living in my feelings or chose to numb everything in my life bc in my mind it made it easier to cope with the pain. But all I was doing was sweeping the issue under the rug and eventually I tripped in front of the whole world.”
Ronnie also sympathized with other addicts in the comment section.
“It’s amazing how 5 years of hard work and dedication literally fighting a battle everyday,” he wrote. “And literally in the matter of a week of slippin up you can destroy all the hard work you put in for years.”
RELATED STORY: Ronnie Ortiz-Magro’s Baby Mama Jenn Harley Responds After Being Arrested (Again) for Domestic Violence (Exclusive Details of Arrest!)
(Photos: MTV; Instagram)
